Hey guys can i talk to someone? I need some encouragement and advice

Thank you! This message thread gives me stength! I will :)

@Coul.C I’m so glad! Good luck to you!!

Hi!! Thank you! How is your night/morning?

@Coul.C My night is going alright! How about you?

@anaserafina Im kinda struggling. I did something i had been avoiding for awhile and now i have this itch to redo it or change it. The feeling that I didn’t do it right. (It was making a new email and using it for different things) im trying to sit with the feeling but now I feel like anything that has to do with the account is tainted. Makes me not want to do anything with it until ive deleted it?

@Coul.C I see, I think I would suggest keep doing what you’re doing!! Sit with that discomfort! You can find something to do at the same time but don’t force the discomfort away and don’t give in! You got this!!!

@anaserafina Gotcha i just feel so uncomfortable. Im about to make a big purchase and feel like if i do it’ll cement anything bad that could happen by not redoing or changing the things? Does that make sense? Idk if I explained it right. That’s what makes me afraid because if i make such a big purchase just to delete it... thatd sure be a waste 😅

@Coul.C But at the same time i want to be brave i just dont want to make a mistake

Yeah it’s just my dads money that he gave me so i feel a little bad

@Coul.C Ah I see! I do encourage you to challenge yourself to sit with the discomfort but I also don’t want to tell you you have to push yourself too much!! If it isn’t gonna work right now, don’t make it, trying is good enough I think :)

@anaserafina What do you mean by isn’t going to work right now? Sorry for questioning im just curious.

@Coul.C No worries at all! If you can’t make the big purchase right now, that’s okay! Just try and do it if you need to at some point, working up to it if that’s easier?

@anaserafina No i can make the purchase! I have the money already! I just worry it’ll be a waste if i back track or something. Sorry for talking so much :) i really appreciate you being here and talking me through though

@Coul.C No no I know what you mean, sorry I wasn’t clear on my end! If it makes you too anxious to make the purchase, don’t push yourself too hard. Sorry about that! :)

@anaserafina Ohh gotcha haha. Thanks. I feel like im rambling so sorry again for that. It’s just making this account and such has been hard to do and i keep pushing it back... i dont know when I’ll be ready tbh and idk. What do you do when faced with a big exposure your not sure if you should do? Cause i do want to but i dont want to make mistakes. Sorry again.

@Coul.C You have nothing to apologize for :) and you’re totally fine! When faced with a big exposure, it really really frightens me, but I do kind of tell myself it’s the best for my recovery and that I can get through it, and for me if it’s something one and done and sitting with discomfort afterwards, treating myself while I’m uncomfortable? So like getting ice cream or spending time with someone I love or watching a movie, just so I have a support system while I’m uncomfortable to show myself I can do it! I hope this helps!!

@anaserafina That does help. Alot actually. So you do think i should go ahead and do this then?

@Coul.C Also last last question what do you mean by one and done? Because idk if this exposure would be or not. Making an email is kind of like a permanent thing that I can’t change which is why this exposure is kinda scary for me.

@Coul.C I think that decision is up to you, and by one and done, I mean making the decision to do something that would be an exposure and then sitting with the discomfort following? Would that work for this?

@anaserafina If its just that then yeah i would think. I thought you meant something like speaking out your fears or something along those lines since after there would be no trace of the exposure you just did. Can exposures be things that are permanent like creating an email? Thanks again for the help... I really do feel better I don’t want to be a bother though

Which both? And ok. I think ill make the purchase as well tonight... it might be a big exposure but i want to get better in terms of my ocds severity

@Coul.C Sorry again! Both in terms of something permanent as well as something that would have no trace. And best of luck to you! I know I’m a stranger but I know you can do it!!!!❤️❤️❤️

@anaserafina Thank you soooooo muchhhh you’ve helped me tremendously and I appreciate having someone to talk to it makes me feel like i can start today off right. I gues im nervous so i keep over analyzing your words but you really don’t need to apologize. Um just curious even though creating an email would leave a trace would you consider it one and done as well?

@Coul.C Of course! I’m glad to help! And yes I would, since your sending it off and sitting with your discomfort - perfect exposure!

@anaserafina This made me smile for some reason. Thank you so much even though you are a stranger you don’t know how much your words have helped me tonight. I have tears in my eyes writing this haha. I’ll try to do more of the things im avoiding and fight my ocd more fiercely at least today. Thanks so much ❤️ again.. you’re an amazing person