- Date posted
- 4y
- Date posted
- 4y
First , you should stop checking what turns you on and what doesn’t. That is going to do nothing but make it worse. The brain does not know you orientation. Anything can turn a person on. Your brain looks for dopamine, especially in pornography. Your brain tends to like things more taboo. Sometimes your brain likes the anxiety that comes with it. I can’t stress this enough, but STOP checking. You will never find what you’re looking for.
- Date posted
- 4y
so you’re saying fantasies and taboo things don’t mean anything about sexual orientation and that that’s just the brain and the actions are what matter right?
- Date posted
- 4y
Yes, So I was addicted to porn. And I was so confused why I went from watching straight porn to gay porn. But yeah there is a lot of research on it. There are so many people who watch things that they don’t identify with. It becomes an addiction and something you brain looks for. There are a lot of people who have start having HOCD becuase or it too. That’s why i recommend people to stop watching porn. Especially us with HOCD.
- Date posted
- 4y
Have you gotten any better man? I’ve done so many checking compulsions that I honestly can’t tell anymore.
- Date posted
- 4y
@nGfloat So from when my HOCD first flared up, I have gotten better. Not watching porn has helped me, because it became a constant checking of what aroused me more. And we know how that goes🤦🏽♂️ I am trying to break the habit of constant “checking”. It became so automatic to check if I was attracted to someone of either sex, and it would always let me down. I’m trying to get to the point where I don’t care. It doesn’t matter and shouldn’t matter. This is my life, and I don’t want to be controlled by my thoughts and feelings that are unwanted. Do your best to break the “checking compulsions”. It has been the hardest thing for me to break, I have still been doing it constantly. But hey any progress is progress. I can 100% say if I never started watching porn, I don’t think my HOCD would have flared up like this. There was an article i read before. It mentioned if you were to live on the farm with no internet, phone , or TV your entire life, do you think your HOCD would still be there?
- Date posted
- 4y
@NoRuminations same! my hocd would’ve never started if i never watched porn.
- Date posted
- 4y
@NoRuminations I still struggle man. I had the most intense feeling I think I have ever felt in my chest and it felt like I wanted to be gay with every ounce of my being, but now I’m confused and can’t tell if I like it or not.
- Date posted
- 4y
this is research based, but the female brain can literally get turned on by ANYTHING sexual. no matter what. i wouldn’t worry tbh
- Date posted
- 4y
please someone respond
- Date posted
- 4y
i can’t give you reassurance but if it makes you feel any better i’m scared the reason i’m not being bi is bc my bf got mad at me when i came out to him. he’s not against it but he just hates when i say it bc he knows it’s not me. and of course me fearing abandonment i wanna be with him so i’m scared of that.
- Date posted
- 4y
i genuinely cried after i told him and not a happy cry it was a compulsion.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 24w
can i turn gay? and suddenly start liking gay and men sexual parts even though i never liked them before i scared i will start doing it and lose my attraction to females
- Date posted
- 16w
Hi everyone, I’ve been really anxious lately, and I just need to get this out of my head. Someone recently told me that maybe I’m bisexual — that I might be more sexually attracted to women, but more romantically attracted to men. That bisexuality is not 50/50. And ever since I heard that, I’ve been spiraling. The thing is: I don’t want this to be true. It scares me. I don’t feel romantic attraction to women, I’ve never wanted to be in a relationship with one. But yes, I get aroused by fantasies involving women — and that makes me feel broken or like I’ve been lying to myself. I love my boyfriend deeply, I don’t want to lose him. I want to feel fully connected to him, physically and emotionally. But now I’m stuck in this obsessive loop of questioning: “What if I’m just in denial?” “What if I’m not really straight?” “What if this is why my libido is low?” It’s exhausting, and I don’t know if this is OCD, anxiety, or if something is fundamentally wrong. Has anyone else felt this split — romantic feelings for one gender, sexual feelings for another? I feel so alone and scared. Thanks for listening.
- Date posted
- 11w
So I’ve been recovering from my obsession from my sexuality bc I am attracted to men 100% but when I was a child, a cousin I was really close to had me do things to her and ever since then my perspective on things have changed. After that experience I would sit in corners and watch girls kissing and when i got older and learned what pornography was, I would watch girls to learn how to pleasure myself and I would hide and watch women on women in the same room where I was sa’d in. When I became a teen I started learning about wattpad and teen stories and i got so into men and dating in the books and I ended up forgetting about all of those things that changed me. I never thought about any of the girl things till a old friend brought it up and said I should explore but it really makes me uncomfortable to do something like that because it doesn’t feel right and it makes me feel sick to my stomach to be with women or even talk to one that way bc I’ve never perceived women in that way. I’ve always fangirled over men and male celebrities and I have my favorite singers like Sabrina carpenter but I’ve never thought about her in that light nor have I done any other women. I even read this document called am I a lesbian and it’s very good and it helped me realize that I am straight and it definitely took a bit of weight off my shoulders but then I saw a video of a therapist saying how being sa’d doesn’t change your sexuality and so I looked up how did people know or what clues did they have to know if they were bi and a lot of people usually know from a young age as young as elementary and having crushes on women and men but i never thought about women in general even tho I watched porn on it. I simply did it because it was really all I knew and I guess it was familiar to me?? now my new obsession is what does this mean for me ? And how do I know if im attracted to a women? I’ve never had a crush on one before. I never even thought about any of this until my friend tried to convince me to explore and it all just sparked from there. Ever since that day I’ve been avoidant of women and giving them genuine compliments like I used to. Everything all of a sudden seems inappropriate or gay to do. I get anxious and my lower body part starts to ache (groin) and it keeps making me wonder if that is attraction or fear or am I uncomfortable? But when im around a man I clearly find attractive or a male celebrity I find hot, or if I have a crush/relationship with a guy, I start smiling and trying to act all pretty and squealing like a kid who just got the best Christmas gift and I know that I clearly want to bone him. And my biggest dream is to be a mother. I want to get married to a man who will be the love of my life and have a happy family and I just personally never seen myself doing that with a woman and i can’t even imagine myself doing so. I know that probably seems cliche and I know this probably is a lot but what does it mean ? Am I just in denial or is it something more ?
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