- Date posted
- 4y
- Date posted
- 4y
First , you should stop checking what turns you on and what doesn’t. That is going to do nothing but make it worse. The brain does not know you orientation. Anything can turn a person on. Your brain looks for dopamine, especially in pornography. Your brain tends to like things more taboo. Sometimes your brain likes the anxiety that comes with it. I can’t stress this enough, but STOP checking. You will never find what you’re looking for.
- Date posted
- 4y
so you’re saying fantasies and taboo things don’t mean anything about sexual orientation and that that’s just the brain and the actions are what matter right?
- Date posted
- 4y
Yes, So I was addicted to porn. And I was so confused why I went from watching straight porn to gay porn. But yeah there is a lot of research on it. There are so many people who watch things that they don’t identify with. It becomes an addiction and something you brain looks for. There are a lot of people who have start having HOCD becuase or it too. That’s why i recommend people to stop watching porn. Especially us with HOCD.
- Date posted
- 4y
Have you gotten any better man? I’ve done so many checking compulsions that I honestly can’t tell anymore.
- Date posted
- 4y
@nGfloat So from when my HOCD first flared up, I have gotten better. Not watching porn has helped me, because it became a constant checking of what aroused me more. And we know how that goes🤦🏽♂️ I am trying to break the habit of constant “checking”. It became so automatic to check if I was attracted to someone of either sex, and it would always let me down. I’m trying to get to the point where I don’t care. It doesn’t matter and shouldn’t matter. This is my life, and I don’t want to be controlled by my thoughts and feelings that are unwanted. Do your best to break the “checking compulsions”. It has been the hardest thing for me to break, I have still been doing it constantly. But hey any progress is progress. I can 100% say if I never started watching porn, I don’t think my HOCD would have flared up like this. There was an article i read before. It mentioned if you were to live on the farm with no internet, phone , or TV your entire life, do you think your HOCD would still be there?
- Date posted
- 4y
@NoRuminations same! my hocd would’ve never started if i never watched porn.
- Date posted
- 4y
@NoRuminations I still struggle man. I had the most intense feeling I think I have ever felt in my chest and it felt like I wanted to be gay with every ounce of my being, but now I’m confused and can’t tell if I like it or not.
- Date posted
- 4y
this is research based, but the female brain can literally get turned on by ANYTHING sexual. no matter what. i wouldn’t worry tbh
- Date posted
- 4y
please someone respond
- Date posted
- 4y
i can’t give you reassurance but if it makes you feel any better i’m scared the reason i’m not being bi is bc my bf got mad at me when i came out to him. he’s not against it but he just hates when i say it bc he knows it’s not me. and of course me fearing abandonment i wanna be with him so i’m scared of that.
- Date posted
- 4y
i genuinely cried after i told him and not a happy cry it was a compulsion.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 23w
straight girl suffering from hocd, okay so when i was younger i looked at like a girl corn star insta for like 2 weeks and like did get aroused by it, didn’t think much of it still fancied boys, girls were like ew no to me, but its triggering my hocd so badly, like is it normal that i could look at a sexy pic of a girl n get aroused by it, but like a shirtless pic of a boy i wouldn’t, however i have insane attraction to men irl, i love my boyfriend, i love the idea of being with a man and hate the idea of being with a woman, this really freaking me out!
- Date posted
- 17w
can i turn gay? and suddenly start liking gay and men sexual parts even though i never liked them before i scared i will start doing it and lose my attraction to females
- Date posted
- 12w
Last night I took my meds to help me sleep and I kept waking up throughout the night with thoughts like “I’m really a lesbian now” or “I’m ok with it now, this is what I prefer”. I really feel like everyday for a couple of days now, I’ve woken up feeling more and more like my preferences have completely changed. The first few days was major anxiety, panic attacks, then I had a really bad double-bind and reversal spiral, and I became a little bit calmer since then. Now I feel like I’m managing the thoughts without anxiety or panic like I’m used to, but now it feels like I really want them and that I’m ok with it. Like I don’t care anymore. But the thing is, in between all of the mini spiral episodes I’ve had, I had these little moments of clarity like “I’m not giving up on my fantasies of men” or “I’ve always wanted men, that doesn’t just change”. But last night I’ve had really sexual dreams that I’m having trouble interpreting. I had one where I think it was me sleeping with a guy, but I woke up frantically because I think the roles got reversed, but I’m not sure. Another one I was a random woman with a husband, but I think the roles got reversed again so I woke up immediately. Both times it felt like arousal. Obviously I still care somewhat if I’m still here asking, but my brain or maybe me (I’m really not sure anymore) is telling me that I’m a lesbian now and I prefer it. It’s like I don’t care and want it now. It’s like I’m not even feeling confusion about it. I don’t know if it’s because of the meds, I’ve been distracted (family in town), because I’m in maybe quieter stages after two bad spiral episodes, or because I’ve really changed. It’s literally like I think being a lesbian will be enjoyable now but I don’t want that, even if my brain (and body apparently) keeps telling me that. I was told that ocd doesn’t change who you are, but now I’m worried that what I thought was background noise leading up to another spiral was suppressed self discovery (I’ve had two major soocd episodes in my life: late high school and now a few years later).
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