Does anyone know if you just develop OCD out of nowhere? I have been dealing with stress and grief and I’ve always had a tendency to have some anxiety but always manageable. In the past few months anxiety has been really high. I was put on Xanax and then Ativan for a total of 4-5 weeks during that time my anxiety seemed to worsen and insomnia worsen, then I tried zoloft for a week and with that and the meds I suddenly got intrusive harm thoughts ever since then (been 3 or 4 weeks) and I’m also off meds now the thoughts got slightly better but I feel a lot of shame and guilt from them and the theme of them were so disturbing. I thought this means that it might happen and that’s what’s been really bothering me for several weeks now. I didn’t know this kind of thing existed until coming across an OCD intrusive thoughts podcast. I research a ton for hours trying to find out why it started for me and what it means and I’d it will be there forever or if it was just from the medicines and anxiety? I don’t seem to be having a ton of new thoughts they just keep recycling back to the theme of the original ones that went on for several days to a week or so... and in between I’m getting some random visualizations of the thoughts as well as others that tend to be on the same theme or morbid type. I’m working on trying not to put emotion to these and recognize they are just thoughts but it is hard to do. Also is it normal to have the visualization with the thoughts? Just need some insight. Thank you.

"Pure" OCD

miss down ba...

Date posted: 4y

YESSSSS omg . i literally got sent into a spiral in march that i’m currently still dealing with because of a dream. Granted i had ocd even before that but this is def the worse it’s ever been, i’ve also had visuals with my thoughts aswell as long as some other people i’ve met you’re not alone at all

Anonymous

Date posted: 4y

Really?? Well I’m sorry you are going through that but I’m glad to hear it because I just don’t understand this. It came out of nowhere. Looking back I may have had some form of OCD in the way of ruminating on my worries about having anxiety and mental health and health anxiety etc but never had the images/thoughts that came up recently and I’ve been stuck on that same thing and theme over and over again there’s some variation because it almost seems like I forget exactly how the thought happened or what it was precisely but my mind just made up all kinds of scenarios and things from it. It’s hard to tell if they are thoughts or visualizations or both. I think it’s both I think it was the visualization first and then the thoughts of could or would I actually do something like that? And then it just spirals from there questioning your own self, if you trust yourself, or your thoughts, the feeling of being out of control of your thoughts which makes you feel out of control, and the fear, and just how real the stories you make up in your mind are. It just is so weird because I never have had anything “disturbing” like this come up. I worry about ERP because 1. I don’t know if I have OCD 2. I don’t think I want to be exposed to the theme I have been ruminating/fearing over.

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