Anyone with Relationship + Harm OCD?

Me too!! I have harm OCD too!! It is so horrific.

@Anja82 i like to think of my thoughts as clouds. some are light and beautiful, and others are dark and stormy. they pass by, coming and going as they please, and they are completely separate from me and have nothing to do with me

@branzimm Thank you so much for your explanation.

@branzimm I have already experienced a lot but nothing was as horrific as harm OCD. I have four kids. I think you can imagine. Then when you have a harm OCD that's just terrible. There is nothing worse for me.

@Anja82 have you done ERP yet?

@branzimm No, unfortunately I haven't done that yet!

@branzimm I live in Germany and hardly anyone knows about OCD and ERP!! 😩

@branzimm I've been researching the whole time.

@Anja82 there are therapists on this app that can help you with that!

@branzimm Oh really? I thought they offer this only for the US.

@Anja82 is that true? i imagine they can help you if it’s over video, they probably would just accept health insurance from here

@branzimm Hm. I tried it. I would even pay for it myself. BUT you have to indicate where you are from and if you say that you are not from the US, they say that the service is unfortunately not available?!

@branzimm And you can not use the service to be called or to speak to a therapist because it is pointed out that the service is not available. 😭

@branzimm You are left alone here in Germany! I could cry.

@Anja82 have you googled therapists in your area that specialize in OCD?

@branzimm Yes!! They know CBT. But nobody does ERP! Especially not in my area.

@branzimm I think I have found ONE. But she lives 9 hours far away.

@branzimm I don't understand why we're so far behind here in Germany?

@Anja82 see if she can do sessions over video call

@branzimm Oh, I think she can do this. But shouldn't she be on site for ERP?

@branzimm I see on her side, she does skype calls.

@Anja82 awesome! yea the therapist i’m going through next week on this app will have on on ERP thru video call

@branzimm Oh ok. Would you have the opportunity to see him live? Or only thru video calls

@Anja82 she’s a whole state away so it would likely have to be online

@branzimm Oh ok, I see. ☺️

@branzimm Dear Mrs. Attendorn, With pleasure. I checked the calendar and Wednesday the 6th of January at 12:00 a.m. fits well and is reserved for you. best regards Piotrowska She wrote me this! 🙏🏻🙏🏻

@Anja82 Specialties Anxiety Obsessive-Compulsive (OCD) Trauma and PTSD I think she knows how to treat OCD 😉

@Anja82 congratulations! it’s a scary road but we’re gonna beat this 💪

@branzimm Thank you very much!! Yes, it is very hard!!

please talk to her and try to apologize and make things up. but the fact that you’re scared of your thoughts means you would never act on them. your brain likes to create outlandish scenarios so that you constantly question yourself and seek reassurance. it’s just OCD and it is treatable

@branzimm I told her that I am sorry for what I said and that I know she is in pain. I asked her to also say sorry for the "go die" but she said no and now we are in different rooms and we dont talk. My anxiety has been reduced but not completely

@DimitrisOCD if she doesn’t wanna apologize that’s up to her, just let her know you’re sorry and let her decide if she wants to make amends or not

@branzimm This "go die" thing triggered so many racing thoughts that tried to justify unbelievable harmful actions and it felt so real

@DimitrisOCD dude i totally get it, same stuff happens to me. it’s your brain trying to trick you. if you were actually a bad person you wouldn’t get anxiety about the thoughts, question them, or even think they’re bad

@branzimm Thank you so much once again! You have helped me so much! Best wishes to you and a happy new year!

@DimitrisOCD you too man best of luck!