Just read about the different types of empathy and I feel so anxious. I’m worried that I only ever use cognitive empathy (when you simply imagine how they feel - this is quite easy to do). Like I’m good at understanding emotions but now I’m scared I don’t FEEL those other emotions. Even though I think I do. It’s so distressing. I know I have emotional and compassionate empathy too as I often feel sorry for people and often cry in movies. If someone was being bullied, I would feel for them and try to help. I’ve always supported the underdog. And in films I tend to cry more when someone else is also crying. But my OCD won’t buy it. Like sometimes when I help people, I’m just using cognitive empathy and I’m scared that’s really bad of me for not feeling what they feel. This could be because I often help people online and not irl so it’s harder to see their facial expressions. But still. I’m just really scared that I don’t have emotional empathy but I think I do. I worry that’s not true though.

Yes exactly! That’s what I feel. Am I just doing a good thing because I know it’s the right thing to do?

@garden Did you feel like this before you had ocd?

@Annonymouse No never. I didn’t really care much about good and bad. I felt sorry for people and I’d cry in films or whatever. But now it’s like I’m 100% more aware of it all and I have to pressure myself to be good. How about you?

@garden SAME!!! I cared more about my actions but never paid attention to my thoughts. Now that’s all I do and lately all that’s been in my head is negative thoughts towards others and myself. I don’t really know if that’s ocd or what it is. It’s really confusing.

@Annonymouse I totally feel that. It’s so hard. Any spec of jealousy or competition (along with any lack of compassionate etc) makes me spiralllll. It’s just hard. We must hold really high expectations on what it takes to be a good person

@garden Yup same for me. It’s like not being able to have, process, and let go of negative emotions which are natural because the thoughts are so extreme. It’s like I have a Regina George living in my head.

@Annonymouse Perfect analogy ahhaha

@Annonymouse At the end of the day I think it’s quite normal to think and choose to do the right thing. It doesn’t mean we lack the emotions we believe are ‘right’. And as for thoughts and feelings themselves, there shouldn’t be any good or bad. We just label it that way

@garden I guess I never thought about it that way. I lately have just been feeling so ashamed of myself for even having thoughts like that. I know that not judging them is the key but then how do I know what to accept and me using my judgement properly or not? 🤔

@Annonymouse Hmmm true. I think any thoughts you low-key feel are bad are thoughts you’re judging so try to move towards accepting them.

@garden But how do you accept a thought you don’t want or agree with?

@Annonymouse I’ve read you should just look at it like a cloud in the sky and let it pass. Attaching meaning to it is what causes the cycle :)

:) hope ur ok