Date posted: 4y

I’ve been struggling a lot lately thinking that I don’t have OCD because I don’t have many physical compulsions. I avoid things, I ruminate, and I check things like body sensations and feelings I get with the thoughts. But for some reason my OCD is making me feel like those aren’t real compulsions and I don’t have OCD and I’m just a manipulative liar who is just in denial or something. This feels like a relapse and I’m tired of OCD. I can’t even leave my house. I feel stuck and hopeless.

"Pure" OCD

#happiness

Date posted: 4y

You are stronger than you think. I am struggling too. I wish I could take the pain away from all of us who are a victim of ocd.

Hebi

Date posted: 4y

You are so sweet, I wish the same thing too, and you know what? We can all do that, just by giving support to each other ❤️

0823

Date posted: 4y

Thank you for saying this, just being part of this community helps ease some of the pain and shows me I’m not alone

ShanO

Date posted: 4y

I'm so sorry to hear that you're struggling with this. Unfortunately I have been feeling this exact way you describe, for the last couple months ever since I was diagnosed with OCD. My new compulsion is that I am a psychopathic manipulator who's working an already broken system for the fun of it. OCD us a bully and once you realize that it needs you and you don't need it the process of healing can start. It is a long journey it seems but we do have this wonderful community here and I'm so glad you reached out! You are not alone. Thank you for making me not feel alone. I really appreciate you! Take care and be kind to yourself.

0823

Date posted: 4y

That’s exactly what I feel like, it’s like imposter syndrome and I can’t stop thinking that I’m a horrible person in denial, but I guess that’s also an OCD thought and I should treat it as I treat the other ones. And that’s so true, OCD needs my reaction and it’s convinced me that I need to do all these things to keep myself and others safe but it just keeps OCD comfortable. Thank you for saying all of this and I’m happy I could help you know you’re not alone, and thank you for helping me feel less alone! I appreciate you too, and I hope we both remember to be kind to ourselves

Hebi

Date posted: 4y

This is clearly OCD, you can have only one compulsion, and that will be always OCD, now just stop focusing on it, it's OCD, not you, don't try seeking reassurence, I did it, but I felt like I needed to tell you, since I understand you very well, now that you know that, you have to start recovery, and you'll feel better and better ❤️

0823

Date posted: 4y

You’re right. It’s like I understand that it’s OCD and doubting that it’s OCD is very common in people with OCD. But that what if always gets me. I get caught up in the loop of googling and checking and ruminating. I know I need to refocus on my goals and keep fighting. Thank you ❤️

ShanO

Date posted: 4y

I meant my new obsession- most of all my compulsions are internal like you said as well. Which does make it harder to catch them or notice them sometimes. Again great job for learning yours!

0823

Date posted: 4y

It is harder to notice them and I think the stigma around OCD makes me feel like I’m not as valid as those with noticeable compulsions, but that’s just not true. I am valid and I can get better too

ShanO

Date posted: 4y

You are so right! The stigma makes it so much worse. Your mental compultions are causing you distress just like the physical ones! You are valid and deserve to feel better and will!

0823

Date posted: 4y

Thank you so much for the support! OCD is misunderstood but I’m thankful that more people are starting to recognize what it’s really like. You’re valid and deserving of recovery, too, we all are!

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