I’ve always felt that people that committ sucicide are just wasting there life and it will get better but they didn’t care and I always thought that was stupid and anytime someone would tell me they were sucicidal in the past and tried to do it I would be like wow they are dumb but now since my panic attack and the sucicidal intrusive thoughts I have happen I feel completely different and don’t understand why I feel differently about it and am very worried that I will be sucicidal one day and that I won’t be able to help it but before all this I was positive I would never

It does help with that. I’m not sure what the chemistry behind the medication is but it does help. In the past, I almost felt like the medication prevented me from having any intrusive thoughts. Like when a intrusive thought would come to my mind, it was immediately targeted and it wouldn’t even form in my mind. It’s so weird how the medication works but it does help. I felt like before the medication I only saw things in different shades of grey but a while after the medication, I started to see colors! (figuratively speaking, I was able to always see color but the medication feels like it woke me up).

Last year, I had a really hard time and I understand why people when they are not okay hurts themselves... And I never imagined that I could experiment that. Fortunately, I was able to ask for help and here is the first time I speak about it with someone other than my psychotherapist... But something I can say is that I never imagine commited suicide because I am too scared and in some way it helps me to say that I can't do it...

I’ve taken medication in the past and it has helped a ton! I was at a point in life where I was only having one intrusive thought every two weeks. That’s how good it got but I made the awful mistake of stopping medication (cuz I was feeling so good) and I just literally started them again. I’m taking 150mg Zoloft & 300mg Wellbutrin. When I first started, I was at 25mg and the dosage was systematically increased. Medication does make a difference but it takes a good minute to see it and feel it

I am currently going through the same situation. I feel like my mind fixates on a certain things from time to time. I remember fixating on thoughts like these in the past like 8 years ago (I am 30 now). I am not sure if you’re doing ERP or meeting with a therapist yet but I start my treatment next week and I’m hoping to get to the root of this thoughts or at least to learn to not be afraid.