- Date posted
- 4y ago
- Date posted
- 4y ago
hello! first off - the fact that you're so worried and distressed about these things means they're not your true intentions / you wouldn't do them. many people (mental illness or not) deal with intrusive thoughts related to harm. it's just people with anxiety or ocd (even if u haven't been diagnosed) think that these thoughts mean something about them, when they don't. the fact that you're distressed is a clear sign that they're not your values💗 you're not alone in this. intrusive urges and images are also very common! the thing with intruisve urges is that they're not the same as a real urge. for example - you may have an impulsive urge to cut your hair & this is an urge that you WANT to do. intrusive urges are urges that you don't want - hence why they're called intruisve. they can be scary, especially when you don't know much about them. but they're common! @windsor.flynn on instagram (i recommend following her or looking at her page) has a post specifically for "how intrusive thoughts can feel like urges" and it's related to harm ocd / harm thoughts, i recommend checking it out! as for you avoiding people - that will just make your anxiety worse. you see - our brains don't know real danger from danger we create in our brains. you may think that avoiding people is helping but it's really fueling your thoughts (fueling them as in they will become more frequent not that you'd act on them). don't give power to your thoughts! they're just thoughts. hangout with your friends or family!<3 i promise you you're not a monster or whatever else you may be thinking you are. many people deal with this.
- Date posted
- 4y ago
i also recommend mindfulness. it helped me with my intrusive thoughts and anxiety! there's many books you can buy. what helps is when you get an intrusive thought, don't pay attention to it but also don't push it away. don't try and figure out what it means bc it doesn't mean anything. just let it flow by, eventually if you keep doing this the thoughts will become less and less. and then when you do get an intrusive thought (bc everyone gets them!!), you would've developed a new and better relationship to it, and you'll let it just pass by because you'll know it doesn't mean anything about you!! and do the same for urges, let them pass by and don't try and figure out what they mean.:)
- Date posted
- 4y ago
Thank you so much!! Yes, these thoughts feel very real sometimes, it’s scary, it’s like I have something disturbing stuck in my mind following me 24/7!! I will follow the ig account! And also I feel like this is not OCD, like this is something real, but I guess it’s part of OCD. Yes I feel urges sometimes, like if I could go and act on my thoughts, but I really don’t want to, and it feels like an urgency. Thank you so much :)
- Date posted
- 4y ago
@Anonymous that's totally apart of ocd & anxiety! i'm not diagnosed but i have bad anxiety and get intrusive thoughts, so i know what u mean! but that's normal<3
- Date posted
- 4y ago
@coucou Thank you! It makes me relieved <3 I hope I cope this, because it’s really uncomfortable :(
- Date posted
- 4y ago
@Anonymous you will get through!! <3 theres always blue sky after a storm :)
- Date posted
- 4y ago
@coucou Thank youuu that’s so sweet🥰
- Date posted
- 4y ago
I have Harm OCD and this sounds pretty textbook. OCD can feel VERY real. And I second mindfulness. A good rule when it comes to thoughts is this: If you didn't choose it, let it be.
- Date posted
- 4y ago
Did this happen to you too? And thank you for the advice!!
- Date posted
- 4y ago
@Anonymous Yes, I believe it happens to most people that have OCD, and it can be especially scary with Harm. I've definitely felt the urges along with thoughts and images. It's all part of OCD which is how it latches on. It is so scary. Everyone with OCD has questioned whether or not they have OCD or if this is who we've always been. I had that thought just this morning. But honestly, you know who you've always been? Right? You know it. Psychopaths would not have distress over these thoughts. I've been there too. Afraid of schizophrenia, psychosis, turning into a psychopath, sociopath...all of these fears are also common in conjunction with Harm OCD because its like a brain hijacking. OCD loves to ask you what if, what if, what if. I recommend Ali Greymond on YouTube, and listen to a few talks from Jeffery Schwartz as well. Also, Dr. Michael Greenberg has a great interview on the OCD Stories podcast, also on YouTube. It sounds like you're ruminating a lot, and his methods might help!
- Date posted
- 4y ago
@CB6236 Thank you! Yess it’s the fear of turning into a psychopath, or going schizophrenic, or the fear that you might act on your thoughts and not knowing if that will happen or not. Yes I ruminate a lot, so thank you for your recommendations, I will check those out!
- Date posted
- 4y ago
I fear I might have psychopath characteristics, I really feel like I could be one :(
Related posts
- Date posted
- 25w ago
Hi everyone. I’m going through it at the moment. Any advice would be appreciated. I posted this before, but I really need to vent about this again. Feeling really anxious. I would just like to hear more opinions and advice please. So my main theme of OCD is harm related, especially towards my mom. I live with my mom and I love her dearly, and she loves me as well. We’re best friends and have been close my whole life. I was diagnosed with ocd and generalized anxiety disorder at 15 years old, and I’m 32 now. Got back into therapy this year due to flare up of my ocd. Back in July I had the thought “what if my mom wants to hurt me?” Which led to thoughts that she is going to hurt me in my sleep or plotting against me. Also just other crazy thoughts like what if she’s secretly a killer or something. My mom is one of the kindest people I know, gentle and polite to everyone she meets so to have these kinds of thoughts just seems too bizarre for ocd. They seem almost delusions. There were also urged to like barricade my door at night so she couldn’t get in, which I never did of course but the thought to even do that and feeling like I wanted to freaked me out. I even had the thought like “maybe I should report her to the police.” It just sounds crazy deep down, but those thoughts and fears feel so real at times. It just seems to lead to more paranoid type thoughts and it freaks me out. Fast forward and the thoughts went away, but the past two weeks or so they came back and I have been thinking them on and off. They give me anxiety, which then makes me think I believe them. Like if I’m scared of the thoughts, that means I believe them. I wonder a lot if I really believe them or not. I know I truly don’t deep down, I never once thought like this before, but the feelings and doubt make it feel real. I have told all of this to my mom and she understands me, but I feel guilt and shame as well to have these thoughts. I want to get back into seeing a psychiatrist again since it has been 15 years without any adjustments to my medication, but ai’m terrified of seeing someone new and then diagnosing me with schizophrenia or think I’m experiencing psychosis due to how delusional these thoughts sound. I’m scared to be misdiagnosed, even though I have always just been diagnosed with ocd. But maybe I have changed… I hate these thoughts and I just worry they’re too bizarre for ocd. If this isn’t something else. I’m scared ERP won’t help with this or that it will make it worse, prolonging me from getting different help that I may need instead. Thank you for reading all of this.
- Date posted
- 24w ago
I know I shouldn’t be seeking reassurance as I know this just fuels OCD, but I really need to vent. I just continue to feel so alone with these thoughts and worries. I feel pathetic for writing about this again on here, but right now it’s just overwhelming feeling. I have posted on here before about this, but basically I continue to have thoughts that people are out to hurt me, including family members. I don’t even feel comfortable at home right now cause I get these thoughts and I feel so fearful/anxious of them. I’m terrified this is more than OCD and that these are actual delusions. It’s always just in the back of the mind the past few days and it’s exhausting. Feeling like I can’t trust others and not even myself. Plus it goes a long with my harm thoughts, because I thought “if my mom is trying to hurt me, I need to hurt her first as a way to protect myself!” And I just feel so much dread thinking that. Like I’m actually going to do it and it makes me depressed and panicky. Plus I picture all these different scenarios, like me being in the hospital, my life officially over, losing my job, etc. I’m thinking the absolute worst. I was diagnosed by a psychiatrist with OCD at 15 and have had flare ups over the years on/off, but at the beginning of this year it started my worst flare up yet and has just continued to persist. First started with health, then turned to my usual theme of harm, and now it’s harm/mixed with fear of psychosis. I try hard to just let the thoughts be, but the anxiety persists and the thoughts won’t go away. It makes me feel so uncomfortable and hard to concentrate on anything. I just want to know if this is OCD or delusional thinking. I feel like I need to know for sure, to know that I’m actually safe and that I’m not a danger. If the longer I wait, the more damage I’m actually doing to myself. Thank you to whoever reads this and relates or responds. I appreciate this community and how open-minded and open-hearted you all are. This disorder is horrible how it makes us doubt and question everything.
- Date posted
- 24w ago
Hi all, my ocd has been flaring up lately and I’m not sure why. I think it may be due to stress and anxiety involving school and the hurricanes (I live in Florida) anyways I keep having random intrusive thoughts involving my real event and a lot of false memories are popping up, they feel so real it’s like I can feel everything in them even though I haven’t actually felt them. It’s so weird, like sometimes I will watch a movie and be able to feel the texture of snow or a piece of clothing even though I’ve never felt it before. I have noticed when I get those “phantom” ? touch feelings that they cause a lot of false memory intrusive thoughts. I’ve also been having intrusive thoughts that because no one interacts with my posts on here that everyone hates me and knows about me and thinks I’m horrible and disgusting or that someone is talking about me behind my back and telling people to stay away from me and then I’m a horrible person. I hate OCD so much, I hate that I ruminate constantly on little things and mistakes I’ve made and things I can’t let go. I just hate it so much. Does anyone else struggle with these thoughts or even the “phantom feelings/touches” I’m not sure what to call them sometimes I also get them with certain foods or smells even if I hadn’t had them before or smelt them before. It’s so weird
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