Any tips to know when you should bring a problem up to your partner vs when to leave it because it’s an ROCD thought, I’ve been feeling last couple days like my partner isn’t giving me attention/being off and not making as much effort but I don’t want to bring it up if it’s just ROCD

But there are actual facts to it like she didn’t even say night last night, she’s replying one word replies, not giving me quality time on the phone and today on her lunch she didn’t even talk to me she just said she’s coming off her phone to eat so I feel like those are valid things to bring up n say I feel like I want more attention

But I also do think the ROCD makes me more hyper aware and critical than I used to be

So I don’t know if I should leave it or say something

It’s hard cause they say communication is key but if it’s just intrusive thoughts I don’t wanna have to say every time but also don’t Wana hold in real issues that bother me and not air them, anyone able to help with this dilemma????

I know exactly how you feel cause I have the same dilemma sometimes except it's about my partner liking a sexy pic of an ex-match/acquaintance WEEKS ago and knowing I actually DON'T want to tell him it bothere me bc I've weighed the consequences and realize it's such a small thing and it's probably my insecurity and jealousy issues + paired with my obsessive tendencies. i've red before it's not the content of your thoughts that makes the OCD but your obsessive tendencies towards it and it seems to me you're ruminating on this thought too much. Normal people would simply go "hey babe, lately you seem distant, is anything wrong or bothering you?" and that's how they open the topic and communicate efficiently. You could do that especially you have HARD facts that could back you up that you're not just imagining it but I'd say wait it out, see if it changes or her behavior changes. If it keeps up and is affecting your ENTIRE relationship then that's when you bring it up. She could be stressed about something too. Sometimes we're so hyper focused on our thoughts and our own problems we forget to pay attention to our partners too. Their REAL situation btw not the "what ifs" in our mind

Communicating how you feel is very important in a relationship, it doesn’t matter if it’s ROCD or not! But try to stay real on the facts (her changes in texting style, her not paying attention to you during lunch) and how they made you feel (invalidated maybe? Sad? Anxious?) rather than letting your OCD thoughts come through (I struggle with “she doesn’t love me anymore”, “she wants to dump me” etc). There can be many reasons why she is acting this way and you’ll never know for sure the reason, but through communication you’ll be able to set healthy boundaries and be clear on your expectations.

Thankyou!