So I do a lot of rumination, actively bringing up stuff from my past/real events,thoughts, and other stuff to “figure out my sexual orientation.” I know this is keeping me from getting better and there are days where I can just stop when it’s not so loud but then other days/most days I still find myself actively searching and arguing in my head. My fears have gotten less about late bloomers but more of right now and searching for how I am lesbian due to what I’ve done in my past. It keeps bringing up or feeling like I’m putting on an act for my boyfriend and others of being straight which gets me stuck on ruminating! Any advice on how to stop? I’ve listened to Michael Greenberg’s episodes where he has talked about it and read articles he has written on it but it’s not as easy as it sounds. I also noticed I distract myself from “thinking” like I thought I was trying to stop myself from ruminating but more so any thoughts that may pop up like being on social media, playing games on my phone, always needing a distraction. So I feel like I need to use my phone less too! Any help with what has helped with stopping rumination though is greatly appreciated!

I do tons of erp focusing on this! I’m alright with preventing responses during exposures but regularly throughout my day is tough! It’s just an exercise I need to constantly practice and get better at

@Corie Oh yeah I’m completely the same! During the time I set out to do exposures I smash it but when I’m going about my day I ruminate tonnes, I guess it’s like you said, we now have to start practicing it all the time! A constant erp task 😂

hello! sorry if this is so out of nowhere, but i was wondering what you do for ERP? i have the same theme as you and id love to know what works for you :) it might not work for me, but it’s worth a shot haha!

@alixacceptance I’m only at the beginning of my erp therapy so I’m still focusing on really low triggers and exposures haha so I haven’t gotten to the hard stuff yet :S but so far I’ve watched video of romantic scenes, music videos and things, during this time I get a lot of intrusive thoughts and feel the need to ruminate but I have to sit with my thoughts and not do compulsions! For harder triggers and exposures my therapist is recommending me to create loop tapes of me saying the words/ thoughts that scare me, write them down, things like that! I’m not 100% sure of many other exposures at the moment as like I said I’m focusing on my baby fears right now! :)

@alixacceptance It completely depends on your triggers and making your own hierarchy! Start small, like repeat trigger words, write down your tigger words/phrases, etc. Bigger ones may include coming out stories, watching movies and tv shows with lesbians and lesbian sex scenes, and so on. It varies from person to person!

@Corie corie are you working on higher exposures now? I’m so scared to start working up! I’m managing the little ones so well :S coming out stories and lesbian scenes are gonna make me freak out I just know it haha

@MelodyOCD I’ve watched the coming out stories! And now need to watch the scenes in movies which is really going to freak me out

@Corie You’re so strong! It sounds like you’re smashing through erp! :) yeah I’m also scared to watch that kinda stuff, I guess it’ll get easier with time tho!