First post here! Hey. So I've read a few contamination ocd stories and omg I'm glad I'm not alone in this, it feels like the loneliest place ever 😭 in my case it's a fear of unwanted pregnancy from items contaminated with semen ie. getting on my hands from objects, from toilets and sinks, from mens' hands I'm taking things from etc, and if when wiping after using the toilet or changing underwear etc I could end up pregnant.. it's debilitating and my every waking moment is consumed by it! I'm waiting for therapy and in the meantime trying to practice some beginner ERP techniques like cutting out small washing compulsions but it's HARD. My fear response is enormous whenever I think in my head I could have touched semen. It's such a specific and taboo kind of fear and there's not much definitive research on the topic of it being possible for me to get it out of my head even though in general the possibility is waved off as too improbable to be considered. The 'what if's' just won't go away; because I can't achieve that 100% knowledge that its impossible! It's like I need a miracle thought or something to make it all okay and a lightbulb with shine like 'AH! IT'S impossible and here's perfect proof, you can move on!' Is this fear more common than i think? Sorry for the long long post 💕

I’m doing ERP with a NOCD therapist and it has been very helpful only after four sessions. I have contamination OCD, but my contaminate is blood, even though I really wasn’t contaminated.

I have had exactly these fears. You are not alone, and thus fear isnt any harder to treat than any other, but your OCD will tell you that. Glad you're starting with therapy! Make it your priority to work on your recovery. You dont need the certainty, you will find out in therapy that you dont need to know for sure, you can kearn to tolerate uncertainty. I know. Wushing you all the best!

Hi Ark, I am so sorry you are suffering with this. I suffered from this also as a young teen, I have had so many themes I literally forgot this until seeing you post this now. I am now nearly 30 years old and expecting my first child. It was very nerve wracking trying to fall pregnant but I tried to remember my values of the importance of family to me and work towards that. I hope you find something that works for you. All the best.

I would also guess you are on the right track by reducing hand washing after exposure. You could start even smaller if this is too distressing by exposing yourself and then timing the minutes you need to sit with the anxiety before hand washing. I.e 3 mins, then 4 mins, then 5 mins each day. Then eventually cut out the hand washing all together: One small step a day, you’ve got this.

Thank you! Certainty is so frustrating it's like, you know the chances of something happening are so low that realistically they would never happen to you but that WHAT IF is just so crippling! It's like fearing being struck by lightning or something falling on your head from the sky, you could never COMPLETELY rule it out but its not something everyone goes around being scared of every day!

NO BUT THIS IS ME okay I love how I’m in denial about ocd lol