- Date posted
- 3y ago
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Trust me your partner doesn’t want the negative thoughts anymore than you do, I hate mine so much because my boyfriend is so special to me. Let it be known that his thoughts aren’t an accurate reflection of you or your relationship. Talk to him about it and let him know you’re there for him. If it helps, maybe ask him not to tell you the specific content of his thoughts so you don’t get too upset
- Date posted
- 3y ago
It is just very hard for me to distinguish between the thoughts being intrusive and th being real. All the doubting makes me wonder if they’re actually real and if I’m actually losing him
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@jbenoite I completely understand, if I was in your position I’d be terrified. However it is up to your boyfriend to decide if the thoughts mean anything to him or not. Ask him how he feels about the thoughts and why they bother him so much. I’m sure he wouldn’t be trying so hard if he didn’t want to be with you
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@PinkLotus He says that he hates them and they terrify him and he wants to be with me without them there. But sometimes he’ll have moments where he’ll begin to doubt if it’s even ROCD and those moments scare me, but I can’t imagine that it’s anything except the ROCD
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Let me tell you, your boyfriend really doesn’t want the thoughts there. They do say ocd attacks what you love most. Keep that in mind
- Date posted
- 3y ago
It is just very scary to think of some of the stuff he thinks about, and I know he hates them most likely more than I do, but it’s just hard to wrap my head around it because it seems like this came out of nowhere
- Date posted
- 3y ago
I have rocd and I don’t think you’ll stop being upset. It hurts. That level of uncertainty. Y’all will get through it.
- Date posted
- 3y ago
I have exactly the same situation. I've just signed up to this app to get support for my bf - so the username is his. But I cannot tell if what he feels is OCD or if he really hates the rship
- Date posted
- 3y ago
I have the same issue. In my mind it doesn’t make sense how someone can question so much but still love the other person; I was always told if the answer was a maybe, then it is basically a no. But he has had so many breakdowns because of his obsessions, and gets upset almost as much as I do, so that in itself makes me worry for him
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Oh I feel for you. I broke up with my bf yesterday because it got too much. He told me he is in a thought pattern where he is sexually attracted to younger women, but would never cheat on me. I just couldnt take it. We spoke today and he said his OCD is just so bad. I'm trying to get him a therapist but I dont think I can ever feel attractive around him again. He makes me feel like I'm not fulfilling his desires as he has a thought loop going on of what the ideal woman/ relationship is that relates to porn/ control. It is soo confusing.
- Date posted
- 3y ago
My boyfriend obsesses over other females as well, but it’s more so if relationships with them would be better than a relationship with me. It makes me feel so incredibly undesired and unappreciated
- Date posted
- 3y ago
That is exactly what mine does! He wonders if another relationship would be better. I feel so so so undesired and have told him this
- Date posted
- 3y ago
I tell him as well, but he always tells me that I am the only one he wants to be with and that the thoughts mean nothing, but it’s just so hard to believe
- Date posted
- 3y ago
it is so hard. That is why yesterday I broke up with him
- Date posted
- 3y ago
I am very scared that eventually it will get to the point where I break up with him as well, but I desperately don’t want to because I love him very much
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@jbenoite I hear you. This is how I felt too. Is he in therapy? I am trying to get my now ex therapy. But I just feel too insecure that he doesnt want me to think we can get back together
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@Anonymous He has his first appointment in a week, but this is the only therapist that we could find that was covered by insurance and they’re a drug and alcohol counselor, so I don’t know if they even have experience with OCD and ERP therapy. That makes me ever more concerned
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@jbenoite Good luck. I really hope it works! Remind yourself you are wonderful, beautiful and a real kind and loving person x
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Yep. Mine also says he doesnt want to be in a relationship with anyone else. But feeling undesired feels too much. I can't tell if he really does want out of the relationship and that's why he is getting the OCD
- Date posted
- 3y ago
It is the EXACT same thing here, I feel like i’ve cried so much about this. I’m just terrified that this isn’t even ROCD and he just truly doesn’t love me, but I think that it not being ROCD is close to impossible because of the stress he puts himself through
- Date posted
- 3y ago
It must be ROCD so dont worry, please! I think if he is seeing a good counsellor, it will heal?
Related posts
- Date posted
- 10w ago
I'm 18, and been in a relationship with my man for nearly 2 years. I started living with him around 2 months ago, and all I do is think about if he's cheating. We were long distance for a year and a half of our relationship, maybe seeing eachother once every month or two. I decided to move in with him, and ever since all I can think about is if he's cheating or watching porn. When he's in another room I think he's doing something wrong, I have to check on him every ten minutes to ease my anxiety. I didn't have this problem before moving in. Granted he has talked to some girls on his phone, even having his ex on his phone (didn't do anything bad) and he is porn addicted though he is getting better for me. It's gotten so bad I want to leave him. A couple days ago I broke up with him and it absolutely broke my heart, I couldn't bare it so I gave him a month to show me he can do better, and for me to work on myself. If I'm still unhappy with us I'm going to leave. I love this boy more than anything. I'm scared to be without him, this is my first real relationship. At this point I refuse to even sleep until he is sleeping. I don't want to start over, I don't want to leave him, but I really can't take this pain it's causing me. It's all I think about. I've convinced myself so many times that he's cheating, but I know he wouldn't. I question whether it's anxiety or intuition. Maybe I just know deep down he really is cheating and I just don't want to believe it. I don't know. I don't think he would do that, but at the same time he's really into women. I hate that he looks at other girls in a sexual way, it bothers me so much, and we talk about it often, but with it being an addiction it's difficult. He has gotten a lot better since we have talked about it. He understands I have an issue and is usually happy to talk about it over and over and promise me over and over that he's not cheating. He allows me to have his phone whenever I want and everything, I have no reason to think he's cheating, but I can't get over it. It's not fair to him either. How do I deal with this? How do I stop hurting so much?
- Date posted
- 5w ago
My psychologist tells me because my thoughts are based off of facts/ broken boundaries which is why I am having thoughts of am i in love , am I settling , and feeling guilty I should let him go to find someone who wouldn’t doubt him that I do not have rocd. She states rocd is intrusive , irrational thoughts not based off of real facts and I may have ptsd not ocd. He kissed someone else before we were official and he finds a certain type of female attractive that I find disgusting . So I spin about these issues all day long to the point I’m so unhappy with him and had to break up . It’s been over a month now but I’m still severely anxious and depressed The thing is I can’t stop thinking about this 24/7 with severe anxiety and depression and nothing is helping me . Can someone please tell me their thoughts
- Date posted
- 29d ago
Hey guys! My boyfriend has said recently that he doesn't know if he's strong enough to continue with our relationship because of my OCD. He wants to see me overcome my symptoms and learn to live a healthy life with OCD, but my anxieties and obsessions are starting to really affect his life. I understand his reasoning, it's hard to see someone you care about struggle with OCD, especially when it starts to affect you too. I'm asking for tips to deal with my compulsions in the relationship. I HAVE to know the answer to things and sometimes that leads into arguments because even with apologies and discussions I can't let things go, even if they genuinely don't matter or are miniscule issues we have. It's a healthy relationship otherwise but I feel horrible because it's impacting him so negatively, that's the absolute last thing I want to happen. I care for him deeply and he cares for me too, so I don't want my OCD to be a reason we break up but I fear it's headed in that direction. I'm starting therapy soon, but until then what are some things I can do to stop my ROCD from impacting him? I know sitting in the guilt and anxiety of not completing my obsessions will help, but I'm wondering if there are other things I can do to maybe remedy some of the damage already done.
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