Does anyone else have a form of SOOCD / HOCD in which you worry about your appearance / interests? More recently I’ve started not caring at all about making myself look nice. Truthfully, I feel awful a lot of the time because of this. I look in the mirror and think I’m ugly. But on top of this thought I also think, “I look gay”, “I look like a lesbian”, etc. Then, it morphs into other thoughts such as, “Wait, I don’t care about makeup anymore? I must be gay”, “I don’t care as much about fashion anymore? I must be gay”, “I don’t feel like I can easily connect with other girls when they talk about “girly” things? I must be gay”, “I don’t like as many “girly” things as I used to? I must be gay”. On top of this, I also create false memories from my past of me faking being girly to fit a certain standard. I’m TIRED of it. Of course, I know straight women only liking girly things is a big stereotype, but it’s enough to scare the shit out of me.

Sexual Orientation OCD

Anonymous

Date posted: 4y

This exact thing happens to me. ESP overthinking my outfit looking “gay”

Anonymous

Date posted: 4y

we are the same. i have never been the girliest girl, and my hocd makes me think i’m a lesbian just because of it. it is so tiring, but i know what it’s like to fall out of love with yourself. i am struggling right now to see how beautiful i am because the thoughts make me feel awful. we will find a way to get through this though!

queen of rum...

Date posted: 4y

We’ve got this!

Melodyocd

Date posted: 4y

I have this too! It often makes me scared to go out/ be around other girls because I just feel like I’ll look the most masculine and people will assume I’m gay, or I’ll look the ugliest out of everyone :(

queen of rum...

Date posted: 4y

I feel this exactly! I actually went to a party with my boyfriend’s friends’ and their girlfriends last weekend. We all took pictures and I literally 10,000% looked the absolute worst of all the girls. It’s been messing with my head & self-worth so much.

Melodyocd

Date posted: 4y

@queen of ruminating Awh I’m sure you didn’t! But I get what you mean I always feel like I’m the ugliest too, all my friends have tiny noses and clear skin and my nose is huge and I have such problematic skin so they’re so naturally photogenic and look amazing without makeup and I look like a troll hahah

Anonymous

Date posted: 4y

Yes!! I heard someone talking about how wearing flannel is a lesbian stereotype and now I can’t wear the flannels I bought because it makes me think people will think I’m lesbian

Melodyocd

Date posted: 4y

Yup lol I’ve got the same fear about flannels! My therapist wants me to buy one to do an exposure with haha. But they’re also a really trendy pattern right now! I see so many people wearing jackets with flannel print haha, but I’m convinced when I wear it that I look like a man/ lesbian

hyperactiveb...

Date posted: 4y

For me it was the other way around, obsessing whether the fact that I am into "girly" stuff, have mostly female friends and role models must mean that I am gay and cannot connect with men or that me caring a lot about my female appearance in the past must have been forced to hide my latent lesbianism 🤦‍♀️ same shit, different way? 😂

Anonymous

Date posted: 4y

And then I’ll have thoughts like “well why did I buy the flannels??” “I must be lesbian because I like flannels”

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