Tips for beating sexual harm ocd or POCD: - radically accept all your thoughts, whether they create anxiety or trigger arousal. Practice this like you’ve never practised anything before. - if you have stopped masturbating or don’t when ‘those pics’ come, continue to cum? don’t forcefully redirect anything. Just accept your natural fantasy gets these odd and unnatural fantastical intrusions. If you FORCE the preferred response you will create more anxiety. - engage in sex and if this causes triggers or arousal difficulties (when I’m in an episode I sometimes need 10-15 minutes before I’m hard), communicate this with your partner. Accept and MARINADE in the disturbing yet pleasurable yet terrifying soup of fantasy and nightmare. What you are DOING will communicate to your brain that you have your preferences, and that your fears can be devalued. - also take time to look at your sexual self schema. I always liked to say I loved sex and was usually pretty confident. That’s kinda true, but also was built on shaky ground. I used to feel confident yet it would only take one bad aspect to then make me aversive that aspect. So for example I experienced premature ejaculation with a girl I loved, despite several years of sexual experience and confidence. The bad experience decimated all the good experience. I also have some side effects of sexual trauma that are affecting things in a future orientated fashion. On that last point be honest with your fear - in the interests of leading by example: My sexual failures would always surmount my successes. Successes have outweighed failures. But I was only truly confident in sexual areas where I had a 100% success rate. Problems are then triggered by past abuse I have recalled and the fear that that could turn me into a pedophile. So I have to control my fantasy and sexual conduct 100% to avoid that which I do without realising. When I have real insight, sexual harm and POCD return. The point here is to test your predictions and take a BIG leap of faith to reclaim your sexuality. The other aspect is to realise it is not a quick solution: sexual obsessions are particularly tricky but they are also getting more and more common. Problems with arousal and orgasm were common with people who used to have HIV. It’s the same irrational fear that you could enjoy molesting your own kid, or of having an unwanted pregnancy. - understand that your sensitivity to anxiety and fear may be genetic but it is not impervious to influence. This is where deep work on your self belief and the hard work of addressing confidence, past trauma or bullying and condependancy needs to be addressed as fully as possible. Erp is good, Cbt is good, But some inner work is also required. It’s about rebuilding your character and transforming to be closer to someone who just doesn’t get so easily tripped up. There are many with our predispositions who have we celebrated and excellent mental health. This is medium to long term work and is a deep investment in yourself. It should be seen that way. And aim for a grade A score, not 100%. Allow for some imperfection. That for me is: - knowing I will have perverse unwanted thoughts from time to time. - knowing that I sometimes take several minutes to get aroused, and may need that time again during love making. So I best build on those other skills I’m more confident in. - knowing I LOSE CONFIDENCE, when there is a break in activity ( for me this was birth of our second child which was very tough, and almost didn’t happen). Had that not happened.......I might not be here obsessing. Good luck people. I am FAR from free - and this is going to trip me up again and again, and I will need support and admit my embarrassments. But if I can help you today, then I would like to do so.