The LGBTQ+ community is such a trigger for my OCD to the point where I will try to go against the community because it causes so many triggers for me like what if i'm lesbian, maybe I'm non-binary because I don't identify with alot of womanly things well the typical things anyway, I'm not even a boyish woman either so that plays into OCD, the gender thing is a very new occurrence and I'm realising how OCD will take everything in my life and make it about themselves. I'm beginning to remember when I first developed sexual orientation OCD (I didn't know it was a thing at the time) it all started because I wanted to become accepting of the LGBTQ+ community (I used to be quite homophobic, I'm not anymore) so I started doing research which meant watching a lot of youtube videos especially coming out videos and instead of being like okay being gay is okay my OCD self had to be like now you're probably gay, it's like I cant accept or agree with a community without actually being apart of it, it's such an OCD thing. So anyway what made me remember this is because I was doing something similar today because I've learnt to accept transgender and non-binary people and I was watching a youtube video where this person that identifies as non-binary said a few things I could relate to, my OCD brain thought oh so you're probaby non-binary. Its like why cant I just learn new things, accept people but not have OCD feel like I have to identify the same as them. Thankfully the gender OCD isn't going to be a thing for me because I've spotted it very early so I can keep my eye on it and make sure I'm not doing OCD behaviours around my gender.

Sexual Orientation OCD

Inferno

Date posted: 4y

I had one girl who was a presentor for my class about sexual orientation. She said sexuality is fluid and eveyone is somewhat gay. I asked her “So everyone in here is gay?” She had the audacity to say “yes”. And I told her about hocd by me making up a story about a guy who has it but in reality I was using that guy as a example so she didn’t know she was talking to me. She said “that guy is gay” I wanted to go off on her but she seemed nice and I was the only one talking to her so I let her off. First DIDNT the lgbt community say “Don’t speak for someone speak for yourself” Second how you gonna tell me what I am and what I’m not Third the Lgbt has put so much time and effort for the Pride Parade and reseach to fight for gay rights, but can’t do some research on hocd and just assume we are gay. Like I know they wanna be respected but they can’t respect others with hocd. The word gay was such a trigger for me and that lady who told me I might be gay made my hocd worst thanks a lot

Serine

Date posted: 4y

i’m gay with soocd and i’m not even respected either people immediately assume i’m bisexual and it’s driving me mad

lkkkk1234

Date posted: 4y

@Ness I’m sorry that must be really hard

Tanaya

Date posted: 4y

@Ness I cant comment too much on that as I'm not gay myself but I can imagine that being quite invalidating for you. Have you tried giving them some articles to read more on sexual orientation OCD, I think it's worth while just so they know you're not making it up.

Serine

Date posted: 4y

@Tanaya yeah i would tell people but i don’t really wanna publicise both my sexuality and my ocd so i guess i’ll use it as an exposure for now

Tanaya

Date posted: 4y

@Ness That makes sense, hopefully in the long run it becomes less bothersome for your anxiety the further you go with ERP :)

Inferno

Date posted: 4y

Ps also some gay gays like James Charles really want hot straight guys to be gay, and imagie if they had hocd and was questioning themselves the gay guy would take advantage and say “if you keep checking yourself to test if your gay you definitely are”

Tanaya

Date posted: 4y

This is what I mean, the more extreme people in the LGBTQ community just come off like they want everyone to be gay or trans and what not but someone doesnt have to be exactly like you to be accepting of you. Alot of people still dont get OCD let alone sexual orientation OCD or the subtypes, they just think its people are extremely clean or that your in denial of being gay or homophobic. I didnt even know sexual orientation OCD was a thing until sometime last year but I've noticed how common it is from this app and I honestly think it's to do with how prevalent the LGBTQ community is in our generation, whilst I'm not making them the horrible people or the ones to blame for OCD, I'm just saying I notice a pattern. OCD ruminates on things that are popular in the media and obsesses over it so it makes sense to me that alot of OCD sufferers are struggling with HOCD and I've also seen a few posts on here from people suffering with transgender OCD something I didnt know was a thing until very recently but again how could you not question things like this when it's so popularise now. I think the community needs to be more mindful about people suffering with mental illness. The whole concept of everyone being a little gay is very flawed, it's like saying everyone is a little OCD etc. They are completely straight people and in fact they make up most of the population. I'm not saying all that to say LGBTQ community is wrong but I think trying to make believe that everyone is somewhat gay does not help get acceptance from people and it deffiantly doesn't help with OCD.

Inferno

Date posted: 4y

@Tanaya Period! Like exactly it’s just some of the extreme people that make lgbt look bad. Telling a hocd they’re gay makes it only worst and i was alreayd scared to ask for help and her telling me I’m gay made me shut down and even almost come out as bi gald I’m not alone and found out that hocd exist and I’m not crazy

Tanaya

Date posted: 4y

@Peridottttt You always get people ruining it for the rest of a community, I know not everybody in the LGBTQ community thinks like that woman and hopefully she educates herself on such issues. You're deffiantly not alone, I remember how relieved I felt finally putting a name to how I was feeling. Its hard to explain to people that you have no problem with being gay, they just cant understand unless they're experiencing the discomfort we are.

kosmo

Date posted: 4y

ah i used to be like this (kinda still am but it doesn't affect me much) though for me i already support lgbtq+ community even before hocd, then when i developed my hocd (didn't knew i have it in first few days) i tried going against the community in my hopes that it'll make my anxiety go away or whatsoever. i am still learning alot about the community, supporting something does not mean you're also them. it is good that you're educating yourself about the lgbtq+ community even though it is hard bc of ur ocd and about the gender ocd i experience that too ! there are lots of genders and they're honestly triggering but don't think deep because it won't help. also they might misunderstand hocd and call you in denial gay and such but don't listen to them, they cannot speak for u, hocd is a 'taboo' theme not everyone are aware of it, expect not everyone to understand you and don't be affected by it !! i hope u get through this :)

Tanaya

Date posted: 4y

Thank you! Alot of people will just think I'm in denial about being gay, even I think that sometimes. I get so overwhelmed with all there is to know about the LGBTQ community, that's why I try to go against it but im trying my best not to do that and just taking my time with the amount of information I'm learning. I should note I can be like this with anything im trying to learn about from religion to culture it's very exhausting but im getting a little better at keep a healthy balance.

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