- Date posted
- 4y
- Date posted
- 4y
Following this
- Date posted
- 4y
Can you give an example of “pure o” thought? Just now learning about the different types. But have been dealing with ocd since childhood
- Date posted
- 4y
Most of my "pure O" thoughts are based around a fear of changing my opinion or in other words something that I don't want to believe is true. Especially about something that I really care about or something that I'm actually obsessed with and I really like. I don't know if I'm making sense though. To answer your question my ocd didn't start in my childhood it started in my adolescence. When I was 15 to be exact. Do you know anyone with ocd who has the same thoughts?
- Date posted
- 4y
Not sure if that’s the same as me...I feel like i am going to mess things up, something I care about: an interaction with someone, a work thing, my marriage etc. I imagine the worst and make it happen on purpose and use that as a way to be like”see, you didn’t deserve it any other way” I can’t let it go well because that would mean I could be happy. I hate thinking or being this way but I have no choice to punish myself. I have lost all confidence in everything, I doubt all my own thoughts...etc. Does that make any sense?
- Date posted
- 4y
Yeah it's basically what I'm experiencing as well. I doubt everything I believe in. Like I want myself to be a certain way or have certain thoughts or opinions and I fear I can't be like that and it causes me alot of distress and anxiety. I don't want to change as a person and I always feel like I'm changing or being things or believing in things I don't want to believe in. It's very hard.
- Date posted
- 4y
When you say you want yourself to be a certain way...but you can’t and it’s sucks. I totally get that! Wondering, are those thoughts positive? Like you would be happier if you could be a certain way? Then you said you don’t want to change as a person but find your self morphing into those things you think you should? I feel like I am always thinking about how I NEED/WANT to change myself. It’s all so exhausting isn’t it? I always think about how amazing I could be if so much of my brain power / energy/ focus wasn’t about this shit!
- Date posted
- 4y
I mean the way I've always been. That's who I always want to be. Basically who I was before ocd. So I can't say the thoughts are positive when they make me feel like I have no control over my life and making me become things I don't want to be or believe in things I don't want to believe in. It's very hard to live with.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 21w
So I've been working to address my OCD for about a month now. So far, I haven't been working on it with a therapist and have instead been trying to create my own exposure exercises. The primary obsession I'm working on is the fear that I'm somehow flawed or invalid on a fundamental level. The best way I can describe it it is that its similar to the feeling you get when you have germ OCD and you feel contaminated, except my whole existence and being feels contaminated, so to speak. I've identified a list of triggers, and a list of compulsions (pretty much all mental) that I've noticed myself performing. I started out by doing imaginal exposures and scripts where I'd write out triggering fictional scenarios and read them over and over, combined with mindfulness techniques to focus on my breath and bring myself back to the present when I noticed myself performing compulsions mentally. At first it worked to some extent, but eventually I started to feel like the stories I was writing about this obsession weren't triggering any anxiety anymore or a very low level. So I stopped reading them and focused solely on improving my ability to stay present and identifying compulsions as I perform them, and disengaging. Now, I'm at the point where it seems like my general anxiety levels throughout the day are lower, and the triggers I've identified are producing noticeably less anxiety. But that makes me wonder if somehow I'm just secretly doing mental compulsions without knowing it? Is only a month of rather disorganized and unstructured ERP enough to produce this much improvement? To avoid giving me re-assurance, I'd appreciate if you guys don't directly answer those questions, maybe just provide some possibilities or your own experiences so I can get a better idea of where I'm at. Any info would be appreciated. Thanks!
- Date posted
- 17w
Okay so I have been struggling with pocd. And I have been getting better but now my ocd is telling me that I'm proving it right by slowly started to get better. For example, after so long of trying my hardest to avoid anything protaining to children I realized that I have to in order to get better. So I've been letting myself go out more and yk see children. The intrusive thoughts are still there though. Which is feeding into it trying to convince me that it's real. It feels like it does that anytime I'm a step closer to getting better. Does anyone have any advice on how to help it? I struggle with mental checks and responding. I know that I should let it pass but it's so difficult. The intrusive thoughts have been getting worse too. They pop up over the smallest things. It's all just jumping to insane conclusions and I'm so sick of it. I just want to be better.
- Date posted
- 13w
I still do not have an OFFICIAL diagnosis (I dont have the means to do so) but given my symptoms, past and present in my life hugely suggest OCD is what I am dealing with. I cannot be 100 percent certain but after searching for answers and researching for a long time now, I am fairly certain and confident this is what I am struggling with. Given this step forward, I am making more effort into giving up compulsions. at the current moment I believe to be dealing with ROCD, as I have been having several intrusive thoughts that conflict with my relationship. For starters, recently over the past month or 2, I have been struggling with intrusive thoughts like not being over my ex, being attracted to someone else, losing feelings for my partner and not being in love, etc. I can consciously identify that I dont believe these thoughts to be true but it causes me so much distress and anxiety. It gets extremely unbearable some days, and I have leaned into 2 main compulsions. I have relied on thought checking and googling as my source of relief. At first the googling was genuinely to start finding answers; hence why I have made some of the discoveries I have about OCD including this site. But it developed into every time I was anxious, I would whip my phone out and start googling strictly to find an answer that would reassure me or calm me down. As for thought checking, it acted as a way to reaffirm my love for my girlfriend in my head when I have had the thoughts that collide with my relationship and how I feel about my girlfriend. It worked at first but developed into a compulsion where every time a bad thought got me worked up id either do my normal googling or Id think about that in my head to calm myself down. Over time these compulsions have gotten less and less affective and now when I do them it only gets me more anxious and desperate for reassurance (strengthening the cycle or whatever it is lol). I did some more research and finally have accepted the very real fact that I am going to have to sit in heavy anxiety and not give into compulsions for a while in order to treat this. I have to sit in the thoughts that make me feel all this hightened anxiety and distress without giving into compulsion. to be honest I am scared, the thoughts are more rampant than ever, but I am ready to commit to this. I dont think I am gonna be able to go cold turkey on my compulsions so I am ready for the reality I might relapse on the compulsions sometimes, But am gonna keep going until I can break these shackles OCD has on my life right now. I wanna ask, what is everyones methods they use to avoid giving into compulsion when the thoughts get loud? any advice is welcome :)
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