Anyone else always get triggered by people Brie Larson? Always seems like she’s always fancied by women and it terrifies me :( Lots of little things triggering me today

llike tbh i find a lot of women, especially actresses, pretty and it scares me too but recently it's been like each time i see any girl my heart starts beating so fast

@Nour04 Yup omg same, I can’t wait film or tv anymore without stressing about it, and then when some of them are like bi/ lesbian icons, it triggers me more

@Melodyocd Watch*

@Melodyocd yeah same!! like i've been having a hard time whenever i find a girl pretty because it scares me and i start imagining myself with her to see if i like it and i ask my sister if she finds her pretty too or if it's just me and i'm bi/lesbian and recently it's just like i get anxious when seeing any girl but i don't feel anxiety towards those scenarios anymore, i'm actually getting groinal responses and it's scaring the bejesus out of me

@Nour04 and like i had a thought lately (this might be triggering) but what if all of those mental compulsions i've been doing such as imagining myself with women are actually just fantasies i want to live out but am scared because i'm in denial?!?!

@Nour04 Oh no honestly I get all of this too! I haven’t had groinal responses in a while but I’ve also found my labido is just on the floor, I feel nothing haha. And does your sister know about your ocd? It must be so nice to have someone to talk to about it and help :( Is it normal to think girls are pretty? Like I never know if that’s a normal thing for straight women to think, that’s how warped my brain is thanks to all of this haha

@Melodyocd no she doesn't know that's exactly why i ask her she's straight that's why i ask for reassurance that she finds certain girls pretty too just so i could be at peace that it doesn't mean i'm gay

Wait what happened ?

@Nour04 Ahh I get you! Maybe a good exposure for you would be to not ask your sister these kinda things (as much as I’d also want to if I was in your position haha!), because I guess it’s giving you reassurance in some kinda way

@Melodyocd i know this is so far from out subject but i'm panicking rn because i feel so convinced i'm actually bi/lesbian in denial help

@Nour04 and now i'm like just accept that you're bi already and idk how i feel like i do feel anxious yes but not anxious enough like i used to plus the scenarios i imagine used to make me feel so disgusted and nauseous but now not anymore like what if it had been denial all along ??

@Nour04 That’s honestly suchhh a common thing when you’ve had a theme for a while! I panic about the same things! I don’t get as anxious about the thoughts as I used to which makes me think it’s a sign. (This is called a back door spike) all it is is used getting used to being uncomfortable and full of anxiety, because it’s been happening for so long! Take a deep breath, do the whole breath in for 4, hold for 4, out for 4, hold for 4 thing, it really helps! You’re doing so so amazing I promise! I know it’s scary (trust me I know hahah) but try your absolute best to response to all the thoughts and feelings with “maybe this is true, but also maybe it’s not, they’re just thoughts, not facts, either way I’ll be okay” :) it doesn’t mean accepting the thoughts as true! Just accepting the anxiety, because the more we push away anxiety the more anxious we’re gonna get!! :)

@Melodyocd Is us getting used*

@Melodyocd it's just that i don't recall ever having anxiety before this and i didn't get professionally diagnosed how i knew about this was just after my cousin had made a joke about "yeah you could also marry a woman" and i started doing all of those searches and whatever and the first 2 weeks were super intense i had an upset stomach all the time so i searched "feeling nauseous about being gay" and i got this but now it's like my brain is toying with multiple thoughts like "what if my compuslions and checks as scenarios are fantasies i want to live out" "what if it's not hocd but denial" "what if these aren't compulsione but i'm doing them willingly because i am covering up my denial with ocd" "what if i had always knew it's denial" especially because before all of this back in early November i used to say yeah i'm bi/questioning because i thought it was cool and trendy on tiktok, but even then didn't feel attraction to women, but i once said in the shower "yeah deep down you know you're bi" and now it's haunting me because denial is knowing deep down but fighting it i can't i literally can't i just wish i'd put a bullet through my brain it would be so much easier

@Nour04 sorry for the long rant i just had to

@Nour04 no actually i meant i never recall having ocd before this**(not anxiety)

@Nour04 The main intrusive thought with ocd is “what if it’s not ocd and my thoughts are true” honestly I get it constantly too. We have to treat this intrusive thought the same way we treat all the others, maybe it’s not ocd, but also maybe it is, so we’re gonna just go with that it is and treat it, we gotta stop doing compulsions like checking, asking for reassurance, ruminating and that. Trust me I wanna message people on here all the time telling them every single thing I’m worrying about but I know it’ll make it worse :( But please I promise you’re so brave and strong and you can get through this!

@Melodyocd thank you so much tbh today i was like bro if you're bi just accept it already and i have been freaking out because like if it wasn't ocd i wouldn't think that today has been awful tbh but thank you ! knowing that other people feel that too puts me at ease

@Nour04 Honestly I completely get you, I’m struggling rn too, I feel like I’m lying to myself constantly and feel zero attraction, it’s all so tiring, I hope you’re okay ✨

@Melodyocd i hope you're okay too if you need to vent i'm here

@Nour04 Thank you! Same here :)

Yeah I think I’m the same tbh, I also got super triggered once by her in Scott pilgrim and I spent hours checking over it. So she’s just a huge trigger now