- Date posted
- 4y
- Date posted
- 4y
Hey there, I completely empathise with you here because I’ve been there. Without providing too much reassurance, I want you to know that this is pretty universal for people with HOCD. And as you say, the fact that you’re in your head is really the cause of the issue. Sex is very triggering because it’s the perfect ‘testing’ opportunity. OCD is a self-fulfilling prophecy, the more I think, ‘what if I don’t like this?’, ‘what if I would prefer this with a girl?’. The question becomes so powerful that it starts to actualise itself and you feel like it’s coming true. Anxiety is the BIGGEST libido killer too. I’m sorry you had to go through that, I’m sure it was really, really unpleasant. Try and not let it consume your day, focus on things you need to get done. This is most definitely OCD, and that means in engaging is just going to perpetuate how you feel! Sending love ❤️
- Date posted
- 4y
You can’t shut off your mind but when you stop feeding the thoughts like you’re doing they more than likely will go away
- Date posted
- 4y
I really appreciate your kind words! Conquering the day became easier with this encouragement. I really do appreciate it!
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 4y
Thank you so much for posting this. This literally happened to me yesterday. I was in my head and everything I did with my boyfriend felt like I test. I kept thinking would this be better if it was a girl. It drove me crazy. And today I’m really trying to stick with the uncertainty that maybe, maybe not. But I keep falling into compulsions. Especially when as I’m sure you feel, our taboo thoughts feel 89 times more intense then regular thoughts. Regardless, it’s so encouraging to not be the only person dealing with this and we will get through this.
- Date posted
- 4y
I’m definitely here if you want to talk! Those days suck so bad, but we got this! Just try to sit with the anxiety and let it come and go.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 24w
TMI!! Hey everyone, I was coming on here to ask if anyone has experienced this before! Im in an amazing relationship with my boyfriend so in this post I wanted to ask this question because this is how it felt to me! I remembered earlier today I was watching this movie, etc. and there was this spicy scene in it (iykyk) and it got me feeling some sort of way. This has happened before especially if I’ve played a game or watched a show with some content like this. I felt really in the mood and started to imagine my boyfriend and I doing those things together and I sort of decided to (yanno, the m word) hopefully everyone understands because I just don’t like saying the word😭, but I found that every time I do that, that’s when my ocd is at its worst/peak. Every time my mind has tried to convince me I’ve cheated, when I self pleasure. I get in the mood if I think of my boyfriend and I doing those things I see in movies, shows etc, and that’s when I’ll do it, But literally I realized after I’ve done that at times my ocd is at its worst because my mind will attack me constantly asking “Is this cheating? Does this make me a horrible girlfriend?” If I self pleasure, I also want to add that I mentioned it to my boyfriend at one time and he told me it wasn’t at all and that everything is okay, but constantly I feel guilty for it and extremely horrible. Just wanted to see if anyone else has experienced this?
- OCD newbies
- Young adults with OCD
- Mid-life adults with OCD
- Real Events OCD
- Students with OCD
- Relationship OCD
- Date posted
- 22w
I don’t know if my hormones are extra wild this month or what, but I have been having so many POCD thoughts lately. It feels like I enjoy them in the moment, and then a few seconds later, I get this tiny flicker of *wait I don’t think I actually want to enjoy that.* It’s scaring me a lot. I was watching adult videos for the first time in about a year, since I had been avoiding them because of my OCD. I know they are not good for anyone, but I felt like i could (ironically it felt like a tiny win that my OCD had calmed down enough). But while watching, I had like 3 separate POCD thoughts. And it felt like I liked them. Like genuinely *liked* them. I don’t know if maybe my body was mixing up physical pleasure and mental pleasure, and then my brain inserted those not okay thoughts into the situation, which got tangled up with the pleasure responses I felt mentally and physically. It is all really confusing. I just feel so scared. I know OCD thoughts are supposed to feel real, and that once you get desensitized to the anxiety, they lose their power. But this feels like I am *actually enjoying* the thoughts, and that makes me want to cry. I’m scared that I actually like these thoughts when I’m really aroused :( Please help.
- Mid-life adults with OCD
- Young adults with OCD
- Older adults with OCD
- "Pure" OCD
- OCD newbies
- Relationship OCD
- Religion & Spirituality OCD
- POCD
- Date posted
- 21w
Why are things so real the first time they’re in my mind and then when I think about it later it’s easier for me to be like wtf?? I was watching a movie earlier and the young girl had developed more in the chest area than the last movie and I felt the desire to check her out so I did. Then later I let myself imagine her having sex and I liked it. But now looking back I’m like ew. The boys in the movie have also developed as the movie went on and I couldn’t help but think that in their real life they’ve probably woken up to boners and s*men and stuff. And looking back it’s just ugh. Idk if it’s sexual relevance but I genuinely let myself indulge in these thoughts and groinal responses and I remember thinking to myself I don’t want to be attracted to little kids and how do I stop myself (everyone has attractive qualities so in younger boys I see man like qualities). Idk I need help. I wouldn’t type this out if I truly believe I was messed up but I’m still scared
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