I feel like I'm never going to be happy again 😔

I can't do this mate. I feel as tho I want to be with a man etc.. And obviously I feel attracted to penises. How can this be hocd

I've lost who I am

@Ihateocd83 First, take a second and breathe. Second, think of a totally non-triggering thought. It could be of a person if you like (like your sons. For me, I think of my neice Ella). Next, look around you and name 3 things you can see, hear and touch. Then take another deep breathe. You know for a fact that I've been exactly where you are right now. I can tell you that I'm not 100% great and a lot of things still bother but I'm moving forward. What you need to learn to do is agree with you HOCD thoughts, tell them "stay if you want". Say "sure, why not. Maybe today, tomorrow or next year." Do it over n over. Your mind will fight you. It will look for any trigger, memory, reason, contradiction it can to bring you back to ruminating. But keep with it. Like I've said before, try to get out the house and be in nature or around people. At the same time never be afraid of alone time (but make it alone time with something to occupy yourself). You can do this brother. If I can do it (and I'm the most terrified person imaginable), you can too...

@Ihateocd83 Funny enough, I gotta practice what I preach. I let loss of attraction get to me every day now.

@Jbm421 Your a legend mate and I'm so grateful for your help. I get so stressed because of the the thoughts. Most of the time it feels as though I don't have hocd I don't know what's real and what's not. It's the not knowing. Like I keep thinking of maybe trying it .... it feels like the only way 😔

@Ihateocd83 Yeah, I know what it feels like to feel like it's not OCD. It feels like you lost your grip on reality. And dude, believe me it still affects me. I just woke up and immediately the loss of attraction crap kicks in and it's awful. Sometimes it feels like I'll never get females back. Maybe it's because I want it so bad. That thinking is you engaging and analyzing the thoughts when you should accept and then distract yourself. That is how u get the thoughts to chill out...

@Jbm421 When I lay down and close my eyes is horrible aswel

@Jbm421 When you get loss of attraction what happens ?

@Ihateocd83 You can't try to lay down to try to sleep. Your mind won't let you. You have to do stuff until u get tired.

@Ihateocd83 I can't feel a damn thing for any female and my mind starts to use that against me in any way it can.

@Jbm421 I definitely can't feel what I used too. Is it possible to get groinals in your butt?😔

@Ihateocd83 Like now in the gym. It's terrible. But I gotta accept it for now.

@Jbm421 What goes through your mind etc....

@Ihateocd83 First off, trigger warning next time. Two, you are seeking reassurance. And three, the mind can make you feel anything especially if you don't want it. The more you worry about and/or check for them instead of accepting them as part of OCD, the more you will get them and the cycle will repeat.

@Jbm421 Sorry buddy

@Jbm421 I honestly feel like giving up I really do. My head is a mess I have no support around me 😔

@Ihateocd83 I'm sorry bro. I know what it's like feeling alone while dealing with this. Like my family is only as supportive as they can be throughout this but I gotta deal with it myself at the end of the day. We all do. Never give up bro. You know how many times at least since last night that I had thoughts that convinced me it was all over or that I should just give up? Shit is terrible but gotta keep trying.

@Jbm421 I think what if I'm really gay and just think it's hocd I will have to live like this forever 😔

@Ihateocd83 Everyone thinks that. You are seeking reassurance. I understand. At the end of the day thoughts are thoughts.

@Jbm421 It'd the penis ones that get me. I don't even like masturbating anymore

@Jbm421 You OK buddy ?

@Ihateocd83 I'm good. I was just watching the Loki show and basketball with my bro. Not feeling my absolute best (too many intrusive thoughts today and attraction/libido is sputtering) but I've been way worse...

@Jbm421 I'm just trying to agree with thoughts it's the only way I'm finding to cope. Hopefully things will get better 🙏

@Ihateocd83 It does work bro. You gotta be persistent but it works.

@Jbm421 How do you cope with the penis thoughts?. I feel fucked up writing that 😔

@Ihateocd83 Hey mate I need your help this shit is to real 😔

I don't want to be gay 😔

I'm so depressed 😞