Today it happened. I got out the prison of my mind for the past 4 years. 1 year of therapy and today IT FUCKING HAPPENED. I came out of MY IMPOSSIBLE I am even scared to say it knowing that I will doubt it or remember how I got trapped in the first place. BUT IM FUCKING OUT GUYS. I MADE IT OUT TO THE OTHER SIDE AND I FEEL LIKE ME AGAIN. WOW. I sill never thought this was possible.

Thank you. I posted for the hope of everyone on here that their dead end can be FUCKING BROKEN

@rb@2 your reading about someone who subconsciously built a no escape route to his “problem” and that problem destroyed his entire life and after he finally wanted a way out and had to hope that there was even such a thing...it happened...after a long time...but it happened ....it really did. when I say impossible I mean every value/possibility of suffering would work against me so I don’t get out of ...EVER (you know how scary that is)...but I hoped and worked slowly and prepared myself to come out of it OFFICIALLY. And here I am.

But whatever theme your OCD is sometimes it’s okay to read about it through other psychological self help books too not only OCD focused. My problem was how much can I create or how much will this OCD theme destroy my life in terms of guilt shame and what I would be trapped in most (those 2 things)...so I bought a book as well on the subject of those two exact things...which once worked on lessens the impact of OCD because the OCD guilt and shame work off of social and general guilt and shame.

Do not give up hope *****

so happy for you. this makes me want to cry because i am realizing there is hope

Constantly understanding my theme and suffering more and more - from the question of why? Why do I want to make myself feel this way? Why do I want to find no way out? Why am I scared of these thoughts...that slow analysis was a definitely a boost

OCD will try and convince me it’s not working at times to trick me into going back. But going to keep focused now!

Congrats! So happy for you!

Awesome!

This is also after good therapy and self help ocd books along with some other general ones. Boy was it a process but I (YOU) will get there because hey...here I am...writing about it.

that makes me so happy to hear. so proud and happy for you

what are the books called?

So I first got one OCD book Then one book on “how to escape toxic guilt” which was what you can say my OCD theme way of torture - always working around right and wrong and guilt and shame.

Now I am reading another “freedom from OCD” which is good too.

im so glad, congrats!!!

Amazing xxx

What’s my theme if I keep thinking my children are dying?

Congratulations ?

Nice man!! Today is the first day in 2 months I have felt normal ish...I have felt like I couldn’t live anymore every day. ‘False Memories’ have been ruining me. But I’ve been trying something new and it’s been great so far!

Hi John, congrats really, that‘s great!! I like your approach as well reading so much about your problem. May I ask what form of therapy you took?

?????? ❤️

Hi @jin I have been actually in normal therapy where she understands about my OCD but I was so deep into the stories and the theme that I needed to come to full acceptance of it ALL at this point no matter if it’s OCD air NOT OCD - there is still hope for a way out. Now this definitely helped and I’ve built such a personal relationship with her that I don’t want to ever stop attending sessions haha but I agree that OCD therapy should be first choice for most and I will still consider it to better improve myself in anyway and go through a more focused OCD therapy.

@lewis hey man funny enough the false memories was the first theme I GOT OUT OF before another one hit me and made me create serious distance from the false memories theme that I was able to see so much clearer of the prison I was trapped in because I know that’s how it feels. My false memories was fucking horrid to the point where it was a god daym miracle I was suddenly able to get out and see it for what it is and promise myself I will never go there again. I’ll promise you this, the less time you spend trying to see if it’s false or real the better things will get for you. To fall in deep and proving yourself what happened or what could of happened is the first hole you will fall into. So if you’re deep enough already you must do everything you can to distance yourself from the story you obsess about and try your best to not doubt or prove it - step by step focusing on other activities and adjusting to reality “the now” Because whatever story that you are tapped in...one sudden moment of right now or checking back into reality will break the entire thing...believe me or not ...but this is true and if you work off that method and slowly start practicing that instead - putting yourself in the moment, putting yourself in the reality of WHAT IS HAPPENING NOW - your mind will realize what is real again.

So what will save you is the freedom that you have to live the presence because that is the only reality. The more you do that the more your mind in the background can adjust to reality and start to give less value to whatever is “the past” real or imaginary as it does not matter because right here right now all has been good up to this point and you are safe and sound and the reality is you haven’t done anything bad.

Yeah I’m starting to see that. My false memory’s went from about 20 of them to just this one. I’ve been dealing with it better the last two days. But it’s a ‘real event’ memory so it’s been hard to let go. I’ve been using Ali Greymonds advice and it’s been great so far!

John, how long did it take for you to get over the false memories? (Not looking for reassurance) This one is sticking more than others. But is fading a bit the more I don’t pay attention

With me I never did therapy or anything when it was happening...I suffered a few years until it kind of faded for a bit then another intense theme took over which took me out completely from the first one and gave me absolute clarity of holy shit where was i

Oh right, these ones were/are so painful for me. They are so intense, make me feel like **** every day and I contemplated ending it. A bit better at the moment, it’s so hard. But when you don’t pay attention to it things seem clearer?! The mind is strange