I really need to talk to someone who has recovered from this please I need hope

That is so great to hear. I am sooo happy for you 💕 I just started ERP and am hoping and praying it helps me. If you wouldn’t mind telling me, how long did recovery take you? And did you find ERP helpful? Thank you so much for responding.

@Anonymous It’s going up and down of course but I have noticed a change in how much it affects me. A couple of weeks ago I started to figure out what my underlying fear was, and that was the fear of being single forever a and stay a virgin ( it affected me very negatively due to social expectations and status, and therefor I got HOCD I think). So I started giving it less meaning (being a virgin and boyfriend). I have not done erp with a professional but I do erp almost everyday, I try to sit with the thought and everytime I want to ruminate I do something else and then I forget about it. I have learned that thoughts often lies and you can never know for sure. So I will live my life the way I want and if I find out that I am a lesbian, we’ll let I be, I want my self to be happy and if that’s what I want then it will come one day. But right now it affects me badly and therefore I choose to do and think about other things that are happening in the present moment! Good luck to you❤️

@🥰 That all makes a lot of sense. I’m so happy you’re doing well. I’m going to try and do more and more erp and face my fears. I think my underlying fears are my life plan with my bf falling apart, having a lack of control, and being a disappointment to my very Catholic family. That last part is super unfortunate because it makes me feel like I’ve just repressed this because of my upbringing. But I know that thoughts often lie and I truly am in love with my bf. Leaving him would make me sad and the thought of living a homosexual life makes me sad, so there’s no reason for me to choose that life. But you’re right, it’s definitely good to recognize that we don’t know what the future holds. It’s a hard pill to swallow though.