- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
You're not a pedo. This is your POCD calling. You are a good person! Pedo don't think like you, they like these disgustings things. You not!!! They don't think "I'm bad" they believe they are right. Stay safe!
- Date posted
- 3y
Yeah people like the dude who made the content in the first place think they're right.
- Date posted
- 3y
This was also my dilemma with POCD. I can get into shadman for hours but I’ll just leave it at he’s a nasty person…
- Date posted
- 3y
I don’t ever want to be a pedo...
- Date posted
- 3y
For hours? Damn, I would just cut that out completely. It's not surprising that OP is going through trauma about the shit he makes. Ain't this the same dude that made a IRL Loli about Keemstar's daughter, then took it down? I also heard homie flew his country to do more of this shit, like wtf? Idk if that's true, but my God. It's sickening how down bad people can be when it comes to sexual shit.
- Date posted
- 3y
@POCDhell... Well if anyone is it’s shadman. You didn’t go out of ur ways to draw that junk. I know how it is completely, I was like 13 first seeing shadman and I hated his drawing and talked bad about them. By the age of 18 I was porn addicted and using his photos as fap material, of course that included a lot of his vulgar and fetish stuff. Still regret going that far in my addiction, maybe I wouldn’t have been in. Y current situation.
- Date posted
- 3y
@NihonWarrior516 What a coincidence, I was 13 when this horrible journey started as well. When you're so addicted to this fucking filth, you don't even think about the things you're looking at because the only thing that matters is the next big hit, no matter how crazy the material is. So yeah, this Shadman guy is a really sick motherfucker for thinking nothing is wrong with this. One way or another, people know about his content. I can't even stand seeing jokes that have his name near it. If you are still struggling with porn addiction, I'd be more than glad to be someone to help you get out of it, friend.
- Date posted
- 3y
Fucking hell, I hate it when people say that dude's name, I'm not even gonna lie. Lizzie is absolutely right. I don't want to offer any further reassurance because that won't help you in the long run. Just stay away from pornographic content tbh
Related posts
- Date posted
- 24w
Trying not to seek reassurance, but rather connect the dots on my OCD and possible reasons as to why I am the way I am. I have severe OCD (or at least I hope I do) mainly surrounding POCD. I've had symptoms of OCD the majority of my life but this theme has come up more recently. When I was a kid, and i'm talking 6-7, I was first exposed to some really gross adult content online. It was introduced to me by a friend of mine around the same age of me. I saw some really disgusting things that a 6-7 year old should definitely not see. This was not a one time occurrence, as I had been exposed to taboo topics online years to come after that, such as the same friend introducing me to Omegle... And i'm sure you can imagine how that went, theres a lot of genuinely disgusting human beings on there. Coming back to the reason for making this post; is it possible to early exposure to this content could be one of the reasons I struggle with POCD? It genuinely scares me to death because you hear that real p*dos dealt with simular situations when they were kids, so thats kind of making me feel that this could be more than OCD, and I could be a genuinely bad person. My POCD feels so real, that at times i'm fully convinced its not OCD. Sometimes I can't even distinguish the feelings of attraction between a younger person and an older person, except for the feeling of anxiety and fear. Its really hard to explain without going into detail, but it just feels so real. Some feedback on this would be great, thank you all.
- Young adults with OCD
- Students with OCD
- False Memory OCD
- Mid-life adults with OCD
- "Pure" OCD
- POCD
- LGBTQ+ with OCD
- Date posted
- 21w
Being exposed to taboo p*rn as young as first grade ruined my life and now ocd is making me pay for it. I have so much guilt for being a child/teen and looking at taboo stuff, and it was all fictional or anime or whatever but it was still so so gross. and I didn't realize It because I had been used to it at so young 🫠 I think what haunts me most is when I was a kid/young teen (like 12-14ish) and didn't have access to p*rn I'd imagine stuff similar to what I'd seen in the art. I can't even believe I'd imagine scenarios involving kid characters or whatever because it had been so normalized to me and I assumed it was normal since it was fiction. I'm 23 now so it's been a decade since I've done anything like that and I've never had the urge to since but still. I've NEVER been attracted to kids or had any urges or anything ever, even when I was addicted. The thought makes me want to vomit, I'd rather die than associate anything sexual with kids/minors and I think people who groom or assault kids are vile. But I still feel like the fact that I imagined stuff similar to the things I read sometimes when I was young is proof I'm a p*do. I don't think people would believe me if I said I'm not. I just feel like I don't deserve to live or that if I do, I'm living a lie. I know 'I was a kid too' but even when I was 13/14 I read/imagined stuff with characters younger than me because I thought it was normal. I'm so disgusted. I've had this theme for so long I'm starting to wonder if ocd is right. I feel too ashamed to tell my therapist.
- Date posted
- 17w
Hello, I've struggled with possible OCD but it didn't involved POCD at first, at first it was basically me denying that I was ever a victim of grooming/pedophilia and how I was the real abuser towards my abusers despite the fact that I was the child, they were the adult, how is that possible??. Then eventually in 2023, I saw a video based on a FNF modder exposing him as a groomer/pedophile, and it was because when he was 17 he allegedly had an interaction with someone who was 15 that was nsfw. Now keep in mind, I was a victim of grooming/pedophilia especially since age 11 and even at 17, however I was also a bit of a promiscuous teen due to years of being groomed and I was having nsfw discussions/heavily sex positive convos with people who were 15/16/17 at 17 and I never considered how that could be inappropriate and my intent wasn't to be predatory but the fact that I was just simply exploring my sexuality, also a lot of the people I was doing this with, we were apart of a discord server that heavily encouraged NSFW convos between Teens and adults and it was made by an adult so bad environment overall made by an actual predator. However it didn't stop me in 2023 thinking that I was a pedophile as a teenager and I was genuinely worried and thought that I was a terrible person and I still do. I only did what I did because I was being hurt and thought it was okay, I never meant to hurt anyone and I at 19 literally convinced myself that I was a pedo in my under 18 teen years because of the age gap between me and my friends {1/2 years} and we had conversations that were sexual based even though I at 19 was dating my BF who was 22/23 at the time, I was 19 having sexual convos with adults, I at 19 had friends that were minors and our conversations were always appropriate and never nsfw or those same friends that I had previous convos with that were nsfw, {they were all either 17/18/19 and I was 19} our conversation topics have switched to more SFW ones unlike the ones we had when we were all minors so how could I be a pedo? and I freaked out about it, I couldn't concentrate in classes at all, it was a genuine nightmare. Eventually I did get better and realized that my behaviors were under duress and how I'm not actually a bad person and how I've changed as an adult and do not wish to harm anyone however I'm back on my cycle of worrying again and I've communicated to the people who I thought I affected and they all express no ill will or any anger and were never uncomfortable, do not think about it or just don't care/simply forgot. But Guilt eats me up like a stray dog. I also sometimes see people on twitter calling 17 year olds dating 15 or 16 year olds pedophiles or calling them "P diddy"
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