- Date posted
- 3y
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
I had this same thing with everyone I dated. It’s OCD and if you dump her you will the same thing happen in every relationship you get into. With ROCD we don’t get to focus on the normal infatuation and positive feelings of being in love. Enjoy them while they’re there but don’t rely on them, they’re not reliable. Don’t try to convince yourself that you are attracted or that she’s perfect for you. Making decisions of your own free will without needing certainty is key. Stick around, only break up if there’s an actual, real reason to. “What if I’m leading her on” or “I think I might not like this girl” is your OCD. Making a decision lowers the anxiety some. “Yeah, I might be making a huge mistake. Oh well. I’m gonna keep at it anyway.” Give yourself a time period and commit to it. Commit to staying for a week regardless of how you feel. Once you get to that week you’ll realize nothing terrible happened. Then you’ll be more comfortable committing, deciding to keep dating her for a month, regardless of how you feel. Keep increasing that time. Rather than saying “I either gotta be with her together forever or I need to break up now,” make room for that uncertainty. Eventually if she’s right for you you’ll get to where you might be comfortable saying yeah I’m gonna stick with her long term, but you may need to build to that. I had terrible ROCD when dating my now wife. When we got married the anxiety fortunately became manageable, because the finality of the decision was a powerful way of telling my OCD that I didn’t have to listen. I still have ROCD that pops up in different ways. But it isn’t crippling. Been married 7 years now, have a daughter. Good luck, you got this. Decisions/commitments over feelings, my friend.
- Date posted
- 3y
Thank you so much
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
Sure what’s up?
- Date posted
- 3y
So Ive a girlfriend and we've been going out for a month now and I started to get rocd thoughts a while back and then I stopped getting them but now they're back and it's so hard. I keep thinking I don't like her anymore and I keep comparing our relationship to couples from tv shows and ocd keeps telling me that I'm forcing feelings and that I should break up with her and that would make me happy but I dont want to break up with her
- Date posted
- 3y
Im going to meet her later on and I'm so scared and anxious that im not gonna enjoy being with her and that I'm gonna be thinking 'why are you not having enough fun' that I'll end up not having fun because I'm over thinking everything
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
Yup, expecting yourself to have fun while you’re freaking out is pretty backward. Go in with the attitude of “I will have whatever experience I will have. I’m choosing to be with her regardless of how I feel with her today, so how I feel today isn’t that important.”
Related posts
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 22w
PLEASE do not argue over political stances in this post that is not what this is for at all. For context I consider myself someone with mixed views (politically homeless) and I am connected with people of all stripes and beliefs and stances. After the inauguration in the USA this weekend there has been an overwhelming response from the populace especially online. I feel like I’m completely surrounded by people (on every “side”) who are making very intense and unyielding statements about other people’s morals and values and “good-“ or “bad-ness” based on their beliefs, opinions, responses or non responses to all the different things going on politically. I feel like it’s driving me insane. My head has been spinning constantly and I can’t stop crying. I feel like I’m drowning and cornered and under a police interrogation light. I’m so terrified of saying or doing or thinking or not thinking the “wrong” thing, I’m feeling my heart being torn in so many directions and I’m struggling to stop ruminating and spiraling over feeling like I don’t belong anywhere and no matter what I’m always going to be evil to someone. This is not me taking a side or revealing what I think, or trying to make an implied judgment or comment on ANY political figure, policy, etc….My point is: the issue I’m having is with the way people are talking about these issues and about other people in the midst of these issues, so black and white, so moralistic, and my OCD is having a field day. Just looking for camaraderie and to know I’m not alone in this. I please ask again do not bring up specific political issues or take stances in the comments. Thank you.
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 15w
So I’m not sure how many/if any of you are Christians, but I’m assuming this can still make sense to some of you. This morning has been rough. I’m constantly thinking, “am I saved? Have I never been saved and I’m tricking myself into thinking I am? When I’m listening to Christian music am I doing for the right reasons? Is it too late for me?”. Things I know the truthful answers to but yet I still think these thoughts. I don’t understand why. Why do I constantly think about these “what if”’s? My heart always feels so heavy and I feel as if I need to talk to God right then and there to make it stop and go away. But then am I talking to the Lord for the wrong reasons? And the cycle repeats. Thankfully, day one of my therapy is tonight and I’m hoping to find at least a little clarity on this stuff. I’ve had OCD for 7 years and I don’t even know how it works. Any advice?
- Date posted
- 11w
Alot is on my mind u feel like I’m going to lose my mind , not really a lot but if I think too hard I think I’m gonna lose my mind , I was trying to slp n I think I’m gonna lose my mind , I’ve always been having thoughts about going crazy it never really changed , I have other thoughts and triggers but they always somehow lead Bk to me thinking I’m going to lose my mind , guys I’m so tired , do I even have ocd
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