harm ocd TW i’m usually quite an empathetic person i’d say. especially with physical pain. like if a friend told me they fell over, i can almost feel that? i’ve never been someone who enjoys those ‘funny’ videos of people getting hurt etc. and i’m a bit queasy with pain and blood. but i remember a few years ago being told that evil is defined as ‘suffering for the sake of suffering’. and i was just watching a tv show where they were basically torturing people for the fun of it, and i felt excited? i think it might have been adrenaline and nerves (because i feel that when i’m anxious, so i felt their anxiety and then felt ‘excited’). but i’m just super worried that i would find doing cruel things exciting or pleasurable. i’ve worried this for a while now. even though i’m the kind of person who moves snails on the road so they don’t get squashed. like as a kid whenever i did something rebellious or sneaky, i’d feel this wave of excitement and adrenaline. or with chaos or drama i feel excited. and i’m ultimately scared i’m a psychopath who would feel that excitement torturing people! it’s causing me a lot of distress. i know i can’t be a psychopath because there are so many parts of me that don’t fit with the description of one. and i hope what i described above isn’t actually sadistic. i hope it’s just adrenaline.

Hi! I want to say, you said you are worried that you would find doing cruel things exciting or pleasurable. Here is what I've learned from so many years of experiencing Harm OCD- I shared this with someone else yesterday. ☺️ 1) If you are wondering whether your current distress is OCD or not, it surely is OCD. 2) if you're worried that you would find harm pleasurable, you absolutely wouldn't, because people that do find these things pleasurable don't worry about them and they don't wonder. They just....do. 3) OCD is a liar. It tricks us in our minds and when we struggle with trying to fight them off, we become more distressed. Try to accept the thoughts. Not necessarily welcome them, but don't fight them, just let them pass through your mind, and they'll usually just come "in one ear and out the other". 4) as indicated before, if you're worried that you're a bad person or wondering if you are, you're not. My psychiatrist and I had a conversation one day. I said, "Dr. (insert name here), I don't want to hurt anyone and I wouldn't ever." He said, "I know that better than you do." I hope this helps you. ☺️☺️

I know this post was forever ago. But I'm currently deal with this. I felt excitement over a video of two kids getting hurt and it has freaked me out so bad. I worried I was a sadist or psychopath because of it. But I don't fit that criteria except the 0.2 seconds of excitement I felt... just wondering if you got any insite for this?