I struggle a lot with the memories of my past friends. I remember having 2 female friends that I loved so much, I wanted to get their attention. I remember getting jealous with them when they had other significant friends. I remember wanted to be important for them and hug them. When this thoughts started, I just started to notice all this things that I “felt” or “made” for them, and I started to feel that those friendships were “different” to others, and when I remember the past times with them, my mind keeps telling me and I feel like as if I wanted them and I really can’t just sit with uncertainty when I remember all the things I did or how I felt or how important those friends were for me. I’m scared that I was in love with them and this is not just “ocd”. What do you think?