im just remembering more and more things and it’s causing me so much stress. i just want to be normal oh my fucking god. i keep connecting what i like for myself and saying i somehow get aroused when it’s applied to kids WHEN THATS NOT THE CASE AT ALL! i dont like seeing kids get hurt that’s never been in my fantasies like ever why am i suddenly doubting it now i’m so irritated

like idk how erp is supposed to help me here i’d really love some guidance. bc it’s real events and feelings but i’m connecting it to something that has very little to do with the situation when i know that’s not smth i’m into or want to be into. im into men my age or older i know that so why does it feel like i’m in a courthouse being judged by a prosecutor that knows everything about me but is making assumptions based on what i know or think i know and a defendant that’s doubting itself

Hey! I’m going through the same thing at the moment. I keep thinking about characters i really admire and like that are kids and it scares me to even remember I like them. My mind keeps trying to tell me I must have only liked them in a gross sexual way but truthfully I just liked them like any other character. Like I like Starfire from Teen Titans just like Aang from Avatar the Last Airbender. It disgusts me because I realized my brain is trying to not make me enjoy the character at all even if it’s a perfectly normal liking to a character. And it even stops me from like men my age or older too cause I feel like I have some issue to resolve too. Just remember you’re thoughts do not define you. And what you felt in the past was perfectly normal, my own sister who doesn’t have this ocd likes Aang just like we would a child character and she knows it has nothing to do with anything sexual. I try to remember that. I’m going through this right now with you too, and we are going to get better! An affirmation that has helped me is “I expect love” it was hard at first but lately I’ve actually started to feel that way about myself. Hopes this helps💕

Hey there, I'm going through the same and idk if you would like to talk about this? Just if you want, my instagram is @anibalf51