- Date posted
- 4y
- Date posted
- 4y
like idk how erp is supposed to help me here i’d really love some guidance. bc it’s real events and feelings but i’m connecting it to something that has very little to do with the situation when i know that’s not smth i’m into or want to be into. im into men my age or older i know that so why does it feel like i’m in a courthouse being judged by a prosecutor that knows everything about me but is making assumptions based on what i know or think i know and a defendant that’s doubting itself
- Date posted
- 4y
Hey! I’m going through the same thing at the moment. I keep thinking about characters i really admire and like that are kids and it scares me to even remember I like them. My mind keeps trying to tell me I must have only liked them in a gross sexual way but truthfully I just liked them like any other character. Like I like Starfire from Teen Titans just like Aang from Avatar the Last Airbender. It disgusts me because I realized my brain is trying to not make me enjoy the character at all even if it’s a perfectly normal liking to a character. And it even stops me from like men my age or older too cause I feel like I have some issue to resolve too. Just remember you’re thoughts do not define you. And what you felt in the past was perfectly normal, my own sister who doesn’t have this ocd likes Aang just like we would a child character and she knows it has nothing to do with anything sexual. I try to remember that. I’m going through this right now with you too, and we are going to get better! An affirmation that has helped me is “I expect love” it was hard at first but lately I’ve actually started to feel that way about myself. Hopes this helps💕
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- 4y
this made me tear up thank you so much i really appreciate it! im going to start saying that i think it’ll help
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- 4y
@Xxara Glad I could help! Sending love 💕
- Date posted
- 4y
Hey there, I'm going through the same and idk if you would like to talk about this? Just if you want, my instagram is @anibalf51
Related posts
- Date posted
- 23w
I’m a csa survivor which made me develop hypersexuality while actually being a asexual individual. (Where I did CP and talked to groomers and sexted, ect ect) A few months ago I’ve started to heal, but the fact that I’ve seen so many private parts since I was idk, young? I imagine them everywhere, it’s really frustrating and sometimes I also get intrusive thoughts about other kids or my siblings. It’s deeply distributing but I also kind of think of it from a curious kind of aspect which I despise too. Honestly I have a hard time with any kid in underwear, my intrusive thoughts have been ALOT the last months and they’re really really overwhelming. I also easily go into overanalysing them or even trying to figure out more clearer the thoughts to “test myself”. I think, I hope. Idk it’s scary
- Date posted
- 21w
Why are things so real the first time they’re in my mind and then when I think about it later it’s easier for me to be like wtf?? I was watching a movie earlier and the young girl had developed more in the chest area than the last movie and I felt the desire to check her out so I did. Then later I let myself imagine her having sex and I liked it. But now looking back I’m like ew. The boys in the movie have also developed as the movie went on and I couldn’t help but think that in their real life they’ve probably woken up to boners and s*men and stuff. And looking back it’s just ugh. Idk if it’s sexual relevance but I genuinely let myself indulge in these thoughts and groinal responses and I remember thinking to myself I don’t want to be attracted to little kids and how do I stop myself (everyone has attractive qualities so in younger boys I see man like qualities). Idk I need help. I wouldn’t type this out if I truly believe I was messed up but I’m still scared
- Date posted
- 20w
Ive dealt with pocd for a very long time now and it gets more real as time goes on. I was watching a movie and I’ve read the books so I knew there was a kiss scene coming up.The actors and their characters are children but I was basically looking forward to the scene. Then as they were kissing, it looked kind of weird and mechanical because again the actor was technically still a child. And I let myself indulge and enjoy it, of how someone young was doing something sexual and adult like. Idk I feel like a fuckikg creep but I don’t WANT this. There was nothing intrusive about this, it’s just something creepy that I’ve done. I keep ruminating about it but still. I don’t identify myself by this mistake but it still sucks. My mind then went to children that I know, one girl and one boy, and them separately doing sexual things for the first time and navigating that and it feels like I like it but I don’t. It’s not as real as the movie scene because the fact I enjoyed the scene WAS real but it’s still stressing me out.
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