I’m confused on something… so me and my ex broke up three weeks ago and she wants me in her life and I wanna get back but I wanted to talk about something else, I have dreams about her all the time and she affect everything my sleep, hunger everything. And idk if it’s ROCD or I lost feelings or if it’s just I’m maturing but in the past I used all think about her and stuff and lately my thoughts have been saying you don’t like her anymore and stuff like that since whenever she unadds me I don’t get worried anymore too maybe she’s predictable cuz she always adds me back. And whenever I don’t talk to her a lot my thoughts say ur not putting in enough effort cuz u don’t like her. Even tho a few days ago I thought about her nonstop and I still smile at our pics and vids and I ask to see her a lot. She’s pretty predictable so idk maybe it’s ROCD or I’m maturing but still like her or I lost feelings someone help pls:(

hey you guys i’m new to the app, i just wanted to come on here and share part of what i’ve been struggling with recently- around the beginning of 2024 i started having intrusive thoughts and they completely took over my life to the point where i began planning my suicide once i had finished out some of my commitments for that year. during that time i met this girl and we began texting and keeping in touch with each other every single day since last february. (tw suicide) unfortunately i did have to spend some time in a hospital after i attempted suicide in may of 2024 and i never really knew if this girl was into me or if she even liked girls but we kept talking up until the end of october where we finally said we liked each other. immediately i could tell smth was wrong bc i was shaking and crying and completely scared because i wanted to be very clear that i couldn’t commit to a relationship and then i disclosed to her i was in the hospital in may and i still hadn’t fully recovered from that (#stillhavent #butiwillsoitsokay😛) and i felt awful that i had responded to such an amazing moment like that andever since then i had been plagued with these constant thoughts about not liking her, being straight (which i still don’t know and fully branched out into SOOCD and i have an incredibly hard time distinguishing what is OCD and what is genuinely true about my sexuality because ive never really felt like this for a girl) and for about 4 months we went out on dates where i felt absolutely horrible because i felt like i wasn’t acting like myself or i was being rude to her or i was more attracted to male passerby’s than her or i accidentally thought something about her that just felt so mean and horrible. i also convinced myself it could never work because i couldn’t picture her face and that continued for the first two months, but then i decided to call things off at the beginning of march because i just couldn’t handle debating if i actually liked her if i was gay if i was a horrible person and if i was wrong for all the things i thought every single day and currently we’re on a break because i tried to call things off and she kind of talked me out of it in a very kind and understanding way. i just hate leaving her in limbo because at the end of the day i just want her to be happy because she is an amazing incredible and sweet person and if i wasted more of her time i’d feel even more awful. kinda long lowk… if u read all this thank u and lmk what u think:)

Lately, I’ve been feeling extremely confused and guilty. My boyfriend has been really busy with exams, and we haven’t talked much this past week. I don’t really feel like I miss him, and that scares me. It makes me think maybe I don’t love him anymore, maybe I’ve changed, and maybe this relationship doesn’t feel right for me anymore. A few days ago, a friend invited me to go to a club with her and another girl. I know that if I went without my boyfriend, he would feel bad — not because he’s controlling, but because in our relationship, we’ve always had mutual boundaries and respect. I decided not to go, but ever since, I’ve been spiraling. My thoughts keep going: “What if I didn’t go just because of him?”, “What if I actually wanted to go, but I stopped myself because I don’t really love him?”, “What if I’m holding myself back and this relationship is limiting me?” All of this makes me think I’m bored, that I don’t like him anymore, or that I’m staying out of habit. It’s hard to tell what I really want or whether these thoughts are part of ROCD or some deeper truth. I keep wondering if I’m just attached to him because he’s my first boyfriend and we’ve been together for so long. Sometimes I even think I wouldn’t care if we broke up, and that I don’t feel anything for him anymore — and that absolutely destroys me, because he’s such a good person who truly loves me. He doesn’t deserve to be treated with so much doubt and coldness. I feel miserable. I don’t know what’s real and what’s just obsession. It hurts that I can’t feel any clarity or peace. I just want to know if this is ROCD or if I’m in denial and refusing to accept the truth

So I haven’t been diagnosed with ROCD but I’ve kinda self-diagnosed myself because of my repeated thought patterns and my way to escape them by searching for answers online (“signs I love her” or taking “do I love her or am I attached/codependent” quizzes) and asking loved ones how they knew they were in love. But recently I started to question this symptom of ROCD, wouldn’t someone in denial about loosing feelings for their partner do the same thing? (try to look for reasons that they do love their partner) I started to feel emotionless and apathy for my partner around the 3 month mark but as we grew closer and had real and emotional talks I started to regain my feelings. But sometimes when we are cuddling i’ll get this sudden emotionless feeling and it gives me anxiety. (It also scares me to think this started at the 3 month mark due to the 3 month rule phenomenon I see on social media) Our relationship has always been soo healthy, I really love my girlfriend and I know it but Im not to sure if i’m actually “IN LOVE.” I sometimes get intrusive thoughts about her looks and feel like im in love with her physical potential rather than how she looks now and that feels so wrong but don’t get me wrong either I still still think she’s beautiful regardless of how she looks. I love everything else about her like her personality, kindness, generosity, and loyalty. She’s my first girlfriend so I don’t know how to distinguish between loving someone and being in love with someone. I also don’t know how to or how it feels to move on from someone after so many emotional/special moments with them and the thought about starting a new relationship makes me feel uncomfortable and is just something I don’t want, hence the feeling that I might just be attached/codependent. I feel so uncomfortable when thinking that if we break up I might never see her again and we’ll never get to rejoice in sharing these emotional, special, and beautiful moments. I want it to be her that I spend the rest of my life with so badly but I feel like my mind is stopping me from picturing a future of us together even though that’s what I really want. (writing this sentence^ I got the intrusive thought of “are you sure that’s what you really want” and now i’m questioning myself) I also can’t help but feel this intense anxiousness in my chest and an inner gut feeling/voice telling me to break up with her without any reason other than because I have a strong feeling she isn’t the one. I haven’t acted on this feeling because In the case that I do have ROCD I know this gut feeling/intuition cannot be trusted. I also read, in the case that I do have ROCD the way to treat it is to endure the anxiety and face uncertainty but I feel like there is no uncertainty about my relationship. I feel 100% safe with her and that she won’t cheat on me, so why do i feel like this!!! I don’t want to endure this anxiety forever, I’m so confused! I’m currently looking for therapy to help decipher my feelings correctly and see if I’m experiencing ROCD. But according to what i’ve explained.. Is this ROCD or DENIAL about losing feelings?