This is so unfair. I can’t stop crying. My girlfriend feels like a complete stranger. I can’t even remember any of our memories. I can’t feel any love. I can’t feel anything. She’s the best thing to ever happen to me. She always puts me first and does nothing but love and care for me. OCD finds everything and anything it can to paint her out to be a bad person. I can’t stop crying I just wish this was all over. OCD is stripping the biggest part of me away from me.

me and my girlfriend since we started dating we be only had one problem, and that is my fear of everything of losing her of her cheating, and it’s all caused by OCD. my texts are massive and i get worried i know i love her and she makes me calm i know i love her. we had a conversation yesterday and basically she said that she feels suffocated with my texts and my fears. she went on trip were she doesn’t have her phone. and yesterday i spent the entire day crying about her. my head is filled with intrusive thoughts. and last night i got so stressed that it seemed like the love went away or i couldn’t remember the love, but it’s impossible because i was crying about her yesterday. this struggle my relationship is having is making me so stressed. pls give me advice

I feel like I’ve reached such a painful place where everything seems real. I feel like I don’t love him anymore, like I’ve been lying to myself and to him this whole time — and now I’m realizing a terrible truth that I couldn’t accept until now. The thoughts come in like statements, like facts: “You don’t love him,” “It was just habit,” “You’re pretending.” They don’t feel like just thoughts — they feel like reality. And the hardest part is that I don’t feel anything anymore. Just a deep emptiness, numbness, and detachment. I don’t know what love feels like anymore, and because I don’t feel, I start to believe there’s nothing left to feel — maybe there never was. My mom told me that I’m lying to myself, that I’m hurting him and myself, and if I really don’t feel anything, I should end the relationship. She’s overwhelmed, and I know she’s saying these things out of worry for me — but it still hurts. My boyfriend shows me so much love. He really does. He tells me, he shows me, he supports me. And yet… I feel like I can’t respond, like I’m empty inside. That makes me feel like a terrible person. I feel fake, like I’m performing in a life that doesn’t feel real anymore. I’ve read so much about ROCD. I’ve been told over and over again that I need to sit with the thoughts, that I need to accept uncertainty. I know what ERP is, I know the tools. But even with all this knowledge, I feel stuck. It feels like nothing is helping. Like I’m frozen in place, and my only truth is this awful, real-seeming feeling that I don’t love him. I keep thinking: maybe I just liked the idea of love. Maybe I only stayed because he’s a good person. Maybe the love I thought I felt was just me coping and hoping. And now it feels like that hope is gone. I feel so disconnected from everything. I can’t even remember how it felt to love him. I look at our memories and they feel distant, blurry, meaningless. I’m scared. I’m tired. I just want to feel okay again. Please, if anyone has been through something like this — if you understand this storm — I’d love to hear how you kept going. I feel like I’m barely holding on.

I have had ocd in my relationship for a while now. When I originally met him it was like this insane spiritual soulmate feeling and we just clicked instantly and he never judged me. I’m scared cause when I picture breaking up with my boyfriend I see myself being ok and being sad but moving on which I never was able to see before doesn’t this mean that this is what would happen or I don’t know till it happens? I still can’t imagine what life would be like without him but I just feel like I have lost feelings that I never wanted to lose. plus that’s also when I just picture knowing how people move on and how I’d just have to move on without letting myself picture processing the losses of all. I’m just really scared cause I used to think of wanting other things in someone else and what it would be like but I just thought how nice it would be to have it and not actually meaning it bc every time I thought about it I got upset and now it feels diff. He knows I have ocd but I never explained the ROCD because I thought it would have offended him so every time I went through a flare up I never told and acted like I was fine and it kept happening and OCD kept getting worse and worse. Maybe that’s part of the issue cause I haven’t been feeling like myself. But this is a feeling I never wanted to feel ever with him. I have gone through the feeling of numb but not like this. And he has a lot of positives but I can only see him overall as negatives and I’ve been told that’s ocd but it’s affecting how I feel. And yes there are legit actual things in the relationship that upset me but ocd has been affecting the way I look at him also. I keep being told my judgment is being impaired but this time it rly feels like not. And I’m Scared why don’t memories and things affect me like it used to doesn’t that mean I want this. Has anyone experienced this or is this the end 😭