Im at my first day of college and am gonna be sick i haven’t been to school in a year and a half & im so anxious im literally shaking

I dont want my relapse to stop me to assist, I will go but I am sad because I don't want a beautiful moment to became horrible because the fear and dicomfort I am feelling this days. It will be a good exposure but how can I enjoy it? The depression came back, I wasn't prepared for this, like I knew OCD is chronic but I forgot it hahaha Right now I am trying just to think in short times like, 24 h and it is helping a bit Update: The day was really good !

day 2 , I’ve been taking it at night. the nausea is unreaaaallll. I also woke up in panic but since I got off Zoloft I’ve kinda been doing that. Hope it gets better 🥹

i finally moved in to my dorm and im with my dormmates rn, earlier i touched the string that my mom used to tie my bed foam and i feel like its from our house. i have a really bad contamination ocd especially to my own body fluid (semen), i used to touched things while my hand is contaminated with it back then and i feel like my family also touched those so i feel like everything in our house is contaminated with it. i want to move to my dorm without that feeling and sanitized all my things before going, but after that tie my mom used and touched i feel like my whole things and body is contaminated rn and i feel really really dirty and idk what to do