I have obsessive thoughts. I broke up with this guy about a year ago because we weren't growing...there was something missing. I wanted to be with him but it had been 3 yrs off and on and i had nothing to show for it. He would go back home all the time and never took me...thay bothered me. I ended it. 8 months later i see he is having a baby shower SURPRISE!!! The girl is pretty and petite. She is wearing red bottoms (i dont have that). He posted the pix to instagram. He never posted me. I have become OBSESSED with them. I want to know why not me? What did i not have? Am i ugly? Is she cuter than me? How does she move? What kinda car does she drive? Was my car too basic? He says he wants to be with me...but it seems to be secretly. I'm like, will you tell your family we back together? Will you tell her you're going to coparent? Its driving me insane!!!

I know he’s not cheating on me. He’d never do that and, as hard as I try to tell myself “he’s proven already that he’s not” and show myself all the signs of commitment and dedication, I still have that fear. It’s eating at me and ruining my relationship. How do you guys get over this? If my brain were true he’d have been cheating on me for months in ways that aren’t even possible. It doesn’t make sense if I think about it logically but it seems like when I do, I create in my head more ways for it to be logically true. What is your advice? How can I stop self sabotaging?

Hey everyone so I am having a really terrible bout of anxiety due to an exam I have tomorrow. It has sent me spiraling. And unfortunately my ROCD/anxiety has gotten ridiculously triggered. So I had a birthday party this past weekend. I got all dressed up and put on some cute makeup. It was a lot of fun. I then posted some pics from the party, some of them included him. They were cute! I had never posted him in anything in my feed. So I was a little nervy. I was hoping he would comment something on the post or repost or something, but he just dropped a like. I feel like he usually comments on posts that he is tagged in, so for some reason this really hurt me that he didn’t comment or interact more with it. Like he doesn’t like I posted it? Or is he ashamed of me? I don’t want to be shallow, but some validation on social media would be nice? Or maybe him just posting me would feel nice. I want to talk to him about this, but I am so terrified that this will make me seem so shallow and a fein for public validation. I’m worried he thinks this of me, as I have posted on social media. I’m worried this makes him like me less. Someone please provide some expertise on how it would be best to handle these circumstances, as silly and minescule as they may seem. I’ve read a lot online (I know it’s not good) about how to handle relationships online. I know it’s more important obviously how the relationship appears offline. But I’ve been pretty obsessive about this and have a hard time letting it go. Part of me wished I never posted anything. All of this anxiety could have been avoided.

My psychologist tells me because my thoughts are based off of facts/ broken boundaries which is why I am having thoughts of am i in love , am I settling , and feeling guilty I should let him go to find someone who wouldn’t doubt him that I do not have rocd. She states rocd is intrusive , irrational thoughts not based off of real facts and I may have ptsd not ocd. He kissed someone else before we were official and he finds a certain type of female attractive that I find disgusting . So I spin about these issues all day long to the point I’m so unhappy with him and had to break up . It’s been over a month now but I’m still severely anxious and depressed The thing is I can’t stop thinking about this 24/7 with severe anxiety and depression and nothing is helping me . Can someone please tell me their thoughts