- Date posted
- 4y
- Date posted
- 4y
I’ve had similar experiences
- Date posted
- 4y
Really ? :(
- Date posted
- 4y
What if that wasn’t an ocd thought? Bc I remember how the thought went, I feel like such a pedo :( but then it doesn’t make sense how the intrusive thoughts really hit me later on and I had no idea what was going on
- Date posted
- 4y
I’m so terrified like I feel bad for having that thought but at the same time idek if that was ocd or not or true? When I didn’t mean the thought in an inappropriate way
- Date posted
- 4y
Now I feel like my abuser bc when he said stuff about my body he said it wasn’t in that way but idk if it’s the same for me bc in his case I knew he was lying and that he did but for me it was more like a compliment type thing? And I didn’t mean for it to be like that and I didn’t feel any type of arousal or pleasure or anything
- Date posted
- 4y
Now I feel like I can’t live with myself for having thatt thought :( when it was a few months ago before my ocd came in.. and remembering that makes me feel like I am a pedo and in denial :( I feel so bad I feel like them like him
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- 4y
Comment deleted by user
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- 4y
But I feel like a pedo for it :(
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- 4y
And I feel guilty for it
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- 4y
@BlueMountain But it’s making me feel bad for having that one thought and it’s killing me 😭 like it feels like it’s proof that I am a p
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- 4y
@BlueMountain I’ll try 🥲
- Date posted
- 4y
@BlueMountain I’m crying bro 🥲 like I’m really trying but I keep thinking new stuff and more shit keeps popping up liek all the possibilities and it feels true and it feels like I like it :( like I’m becoming more and more like a pedo and it’s inevitable at this point I don’t know how to continue what if it’s not ocd at all or what if I do but there are ppl who did and acted on those thoughts .. I’m sorry for bothering and being difficult but it’s just how I feel..
- Date posted
- 4y
@BlueMountain But I’m worried tho bc now that I remember 😭 I’m pretty sure it was intentional 😭 and I’m feeling like this is all proof that even before my ocd really kicked in it must mean I’m a pedo 😭and that this whole thing must be fake or that I’m fake :( like what this is the real me which is a bad person ? What if my trauma revealed who I truly am 🙁
- Date posted
- 4y
It is possible if I reach you 😭😭
Related posts
- Date posted
- 24w
Why are things so real the first time they’re in my mind and then when I think about it later it’s easier for me to be like wtf?? I was watching a movie earlier and the young girl had developed more in the chest area than the last movie and I felt the desire to check her out so I did. Then later I let myself imagine her having sex and I liked it. But now looking back I’m like ew. The boys in the movie have also developed as the movie went on and I couldn’t help but think that in their real life they’ve probably woken up to boners and s*men and stuff. And looking back it’s just ugh. Idk if it’s sexual relevance but I genuinely let myself indulge in these thoughts and groinal responses and I remember thinking to myself I don’t want to be attracted to little kids and how do I stop myself (everyone has attractive qualities so in younger boys I see man like qualities). Idk I need help. I wouldn’t type this out if I truly believe I was messed up but I’m still scared
- Date posted
- 19w
I just had intense sexual thoughts of this 6 yo, I got intense groinal response and I felt like I genuinely liked the thoughts, like I had 0 distress from the thoughts and I felt intense groinal response, I felt like I wanted the thoughts, now I feel like a litteral pedo, I don’t wanna be a pedo, idk why I felt that way towards the thoughts, but it felt genuine, like attraction and enjoyment, I’ve not been diagnosed with pocd and I just started therapy, can someone please help me? Idk why this happened or if it even is pocd, I don’t wish to be a pedo but I feel like one rn.
- Date posted
- 19w
I was just out a few minutes ago and I saw this 9 year old kid, I felt what I hope is false attraction, idk if it was or not, I don’t understand what I felt, but I felt a need to look away but also a need to look to check if I was attracted or not, when I looked it genuinely felt like I was attracted, idk what’s happening but I don’t wanna be attracted to a kid, I’m convinced I’m a pedo bc of the amount of times something like this happened, I don’t know what this means, but I’m worried it’s not pocd, I’ve never gotten a diagnosis, but many ppl online said I did and I should see a therapist, i don’t know if I liked the feeling or not, but it made me have a feeling in my chest, similar to attraction, I’ve been trying to pursue a relationship with a girl my age, but this just feels so real, I don’t know if it was false attraction or not, It felt so genuine, now that I left, the feeling kind of dissapeared, but it felt like I was genuinely attracted to that, I can’t be attracted to that, I don’t want to be attracted to that, I think I’m just a pedo in denial, I feel like I’m writing all of this to try to convince myself I’m not a pedo even though I am, this feeling only happens sometimes when I see a female kid, Idk if it means something or not, but I don’t think it’s pocd, it feels too real for me, it feels like I’m actually liking kids, I really hope it’s false attraction. I don’t wanna be a pedo, I wanna be able to have a relationship with a girl my age. I don’t understand what’s happening, please help me. I can’t tell if this is pedophilia or ocd anymore. Edit: main thing is the feelings not the thoughts because it feels like genuine attraction, I also get urges to not look but to look at the same time, for me it’s mainly the feelings, they feel so real when I think abt it now I’m still getting those feelings, I’m so convinced that I’m actually attracted. It felt like real enjoyment, so I’m worried that I am a pedo bc of those feelings, I feel like I’m not able to pursue a relationship with someone my age. But this can’t have been ocd it feels to genuine, it felt like actual enjoyment.
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