- Date posted
- 3y
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
Learning to not be homophobic is a great thing!
- Date posted
- 3y
So am I turning gay. Please I dont want toš
- Date posted
- 3y
@raj123 Not being homophobic doesn't mean you're gay. It just means you're becoming more accepting that LGBTQ is okay.
- Date posted
- 3y
I'm the complete opposite. Before HOCD, I'm totally okay with people from the LGBTQ community and support them. But after this, I feel like I've become homophobic and I feel so bad.
- Date posted
- 3y
I don't know any people who are gay so I dont know much about lgbtq. But my mind is constantly telling me that it's okay to be gay. WHYYYš. IM 15 And I always wanted to be with women of my age and older. I used to fantasize about women everytimeš
- Date posted
- 3y
@raj123 Same here. When I was a child, I would fantasize about having a boyfriend. Now, with HOCD, I try to imagine myself with a boy and my brain replaces it with the same gender instead.
- Date posted
- 3y
@CharleneP I'm scared I no longer enjoy fantasizing about women. Neither do I enjoy fantasizing about men
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- 3y
@raj123 Have you gone for a psychiatric consultation?
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- 3y
@CharleneP No, I'm just 15. I dont have any financial helpš. On anxiety days I'm like I need a therapist asap. On non anxiety days, I'm like I'm recovering, why do I need a therapist.
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- 3y
@raj123 If it's impairing your day to day activities, it's best to have a therapists specialised in treating OCD.
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- 3y
@CharleneP Even I want to. I'm a student and I'm studying. Hocd doesnt lete concentrate. But I cant help it. I dont have any source which can help me financially
- Date posted
- 3y
@CharleneP I thought I was the only one, unfortunately I think its making sense for me bc I never had a gf or romantic feelings for a girl( Maybe I did and I just cant remember) but I never had any female friends. Would you want to talk about this somewhere else?
- Date posted
- 3y
Exactly, Now that I understand that its ok if you like same sex but now it feels like why choose girls when you can also like guys? Its messed up my head
- Date posted
- 3y
Exactly the same!
- Date posted
- 3y
Just because you think it's okay to be gay doesn't mean you're gay. Like I think its okay to be trans doesn't mean that I am trans
Related posts
- Date posted
- 13w
I need too know that I'm not insane, really. I am 16 and for the past two weeks, this has been completely ruining my health and happiness. I only recently came out as a lesbian like 3 months ago after a lot of confusion about my attraction since I used to think I liked men. At first, I felt so sure that I liked women, but lately, I've been having these unwanted thoughts about the possibility of liking men. I never used to feel this way, but now, every time I look at a man, my brain obsessively fixates on it. It forces me to imagine kissing him, loving him, things I donāt want, and then tries to convince me that I do. Itās painful. The thought of this fills me with fear and anxiety, leading to panic attacks and breakdowns. I donāt want these thoughts. I hate them with every fiber of my being, but Iām terrified that one day Iāll act on them and somehow like it. I used to think I liked men, but back then, I was in a very unhealthy space in a time of escapism and something deeply parasocial. Iāve only ever liked the attention and validation a man could give me, but these experiences are somehow treated as further proof that Iām "bisexual." Iāve never been in a real relationship with anyone, which makes my brain constantly challenge meātelling me, āYou donāt even know what love feels like.ā It wonāt shut up. It keeps obsessively trying to make me prove that Iām a lesbian, testing my reactions and questioning my certainty. Is this normal?
- Date posted
- 13w
For me it was a weird intrusive thought and after that I slowly started developing anxiety and I felt a weird thing like I was losing my attraction to girls. Then I woke up one day in complete panic cuz it felt like I had lost feelings for girls suddenly and I started searching online how to know if youāre gay if sexuality changes suddenly and I took some gay tests or sexuality tests online. Chat gpt was a big thing back then too. That was before therapy and before I knew what ocd is.Can anyone relate?
- Date posted
- 11w
trigger warning!!!!!! Iām really scared right now. Iāve been reading Elle Warrenās articles about her experience with HOCD/SO-OCD, and it feels so similar to mine. She went through the same fears of being a lesbian, felt distressed by her attraction to women, and spent hours ruminating, Googling, and analyzing her feelings. She even experienced groinal responses and revisited old memories, just like I do. Eventually, she had a moment of realization in college when she flirted with a girl, and everything clicked. She now identifies as a lesbian. Iām terrified that the same thing will happen to me. I thought the OCD fears were supposed to never be true and that HOCD thoughts are usually just compulsions that donāt end up being real. But reading her story, itās like Iām seeing my own experience mirrored. What if it clicks for me, just like it did for her? What if I realize that I am a lesbian? Elleās story makes me so scared. I thought my feelings of attraction to women were just OCD-driven, and now Iām questioning everything. I thought I was straight, but now, reading her journey, Iām wondering: could my OCD fears actually be real? Elleās experience was very similar to mine: ⢠She got distressed when she thought she might like women, not relieved. ⢠She spent a lot of time ruminating, Googling, analyzing, and comparing. ⢠Her attraction to women only became intense when her OCD flared up. ⢠She said things like, āI feel peace when I believe Iām straight.ā ⢠She had already been diagnosed with OCD and had a history of this pattern. After years of fear and distress, Elle had a moment of calm and realized that it was true. Iām scared that this could happen to me too. Will I have a similar moment of acceptance, where everything clicks and I realize Iām gay? Or will I come to accept that this is all OCD, and that Iām straight, with the possibility that Iām not? I also keep thinking back to when my OCD lessened the first time. Did I go back to men because I wasnāt actually attracted to women, or was it just because the grip of the OCD had loosened? Elle also talked about the shame associated with non-heterosexuality. She mentioned that, like many of us, she had internalized stigma around being gay, and that it made her fear the possibility of being non-heterosexual. I can relate to this so muchāgrowing up, I never saw it as an option to be anything other than straight, and now itās hard to shake that fear and shame. Elle mentioned that she found reassurance in seeing other people with HOCD who worried that their fears would come true, but eventually realized they were just OCD thoughts. That idea is comforting, but also a little scary, because what if that moment of realization happens for me too? What if I finally accept that I am a lesbian? Or, what if Iām just struggling with OCD and eventually realize Iām straight? I just donāt know. The scariest part is that, just like Elle, I feel like I donāt have any obvious signs. She had no idea she was a lesbian until one day, everything clicked. She was 21, just like me when my OCD fears really flared up, and she had a breakthrough moment in Denver when she made friends with lesbians. That hasnāt happened for me yet, and itās terrifying to think that it could happen in the future. I donāt know whatās going to happen, but Iām really scared about where this will lead.
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