- Username
- Anonymous
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Omg!! I have obsession about antagonizing and promising things to god and now I’m scared bc I made a promise ( I can do ) but I fear that something might happen if I deviated from that .
I really need someone to talk. I been crying about promise and what would happen if i do something else instead of that promise
What promise did you do?
@Nathalie Aki I promised that I would finish my notes. It may not seem like much, but I’m so stressed about it and that god have something over me.
@Nathalie Aki And the fact that I have to do it
@drStrange.One.2678 I have the same problem. My pastor said that if such promises are obsessive, it's not from God and we shouldn't do it. But I don't know if it suits your case.
@Nathalie Aki What does that mean If promises are obsessive?
@drStrange.One.2678 Sorry for my English, I'm not native speaker. I mean if such promises are your intrusive thoughts and you can't get rid of it.
@Nathalie Aki Ur fine. I wasn’t aware of instrusive promises.
Yeah, I've had that obsession before. I can definitely talk about this too, although it's a different obsession than what I was originally thinking about here. What I was thinking about was stuff like playing games and watching movies where it could be sin for me -- aka sin grey areas, like what's talked about in the book of Romans. But yeah, I can talk about this too.
Are you in therapy?
@Anonymous I am but they only evaluated me but they didn’t tell me how to deal with it yet
@drStrange.One.2678 I really need help, any advice
Hey anonymous, Are you still there? I need some advice, I kept antagonizing god Deliberately , saying mean things. I’m scared.
@drStrange.One.2678 Yeah, I'm still here.
@Anonymous Omg thank you!!! I’m scared bc how I been Deliberately saying mean things to god. I think it’s bad that’s why I like it?
@drStrange.One.2678 So are you saying you like sayibg mean things to God?
@Anonymous And do you actually like it like it? Or do you just feel like you like it when you do it?
@Anonymous I kept using mean words like hate and other words along with antagonizing him.
@Anonymous Idk, someone told me that my brain just want me to get in trouble bc I know it’s bad
@drStrange.One.2678 How do I stop? Please talk some sense into me.
@drStrange.One.2678 Well, I have noticed a common, misleading feeling with OCD that makes me feel like I like something, but it's just a trick that OCD plays on us. Do you think this could be the case?
@Anonymous Idk I keep wanting to do it. And sometimes just gone ahead to and just said and I feel good when I did it but then Im scared
@drStrange.One.2678 *The next reply will be long, but it is good and important to read!* This could be OCD, but it also could be not. It could possibly be a compulsion to be mean to God, and it could be an obsession for you to be afraid that something bad will happen. I hope that you will be able to better understand what is and isn't OCD when you start getting into therapy, and you should talk to your therapist about what's going on and be open and honest.
@drStrange.One.2678 I've been mad at God myself before, even if I shouldn't have been. OCD -- and the Devil, of course -- want us to see God as the angry tyrant that we sometimes picture Him as. But how has God been to us? Haven't we gotten good food? Friends? Family? A green planet that is just the perfect distance from the sun for it to sustain life? And, "Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows." - James 1:17 God has been very kind to us. And the kindest thing He's ever done? "For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life." - John 3:16 The thing is, OCD will make you fear that God will do things to you because of some outlandish reason, like accidentally making a "promise", but that is just OCD, and that is where you need to do ERP -- when your fears go too far and too unrealistic. Yet, fear isn't all bad. Fear, in the right amount, is good! "The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and knowledge of the Holy One is understanding." - Proverbs 9:10 And, even if we don't like the thought of it, all who have sinned (that's everyone, by the way) have made themselves enemies of God. But again, God can help us change that! "For if, while we were God’s enemies, we were reconciled to Him through the death of His Son, how much more, having been reconciled, shall we be saved through His life!" - Romans 5:10 Fear of falling off a cliff will keep you from going too close to the edge, and fear of God will lead you to repentance. Yeah, sinning is bad, and so is being mean to God. It makes sense to fear God, as He is in complete charge. But fearing God isn't just fearing that He will harm us, especially not for Christians! Instead of fearing that God will smite us, the definition of fearing God for a Christian is "respect for God." For Christians, fearing God is not just fearing that He will harm us; as Jesus said, "Very truly I tell you, whoever hears My word and believes Him who sent me has eternal life and will not be judged but has crossed over from death to life." - John 5:24 And remember, God does not judge people because He wants to condemn people. But He is the judge of the universe and He hates sin, and it is His job to uphold righteousness. But again, God wants us to repent and be saved by Jesus and His work at the cross! "The Lord is not slow in keeping His promise, as some understand slowness. Instead He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance." - 2 Peter 3:9 What can help with OCD is ERP -- ERP really helps! But knowledge is also important. If you want to know about God, you should seriously check the Bible. But you don't have to read through the whole book cover to cover right away! I would just suggest reading the Gospel of John to start. The whole Bible is long, but the individual books in the Bible are much shorter than the whole thing! And again, if you haven't checked the link I put up before, that could be a good resource too.
@Anonymous Thank you for that. It must taken you while to write that. I want to thank you for your efforts. It kind of give me relief and some knowledge. I’m kind of worried where it says be meaning mean to god is bad.
@drStrange.One.2678 Yeah, sorry for the long message. But I think it's pretty important, and I appreciate you sticking through it! :)
@Anonymous And I don't say any of this as reassurance for your obsessions. I am telling this to you because it is important, OCD and compulsions aside. (I hope this doesn't seem like I'm giving you reassurance..) Well, again, it makes sense to fear God. Jesus says (and I bring this up not to simply scare you, but it is important to explain what I'm trying to tell you about some really good news) "I tell you, My friends, do not be afraid of those who kill the body and after that can do no more. But I will show you whom you should fear: Fear Him who, after your body has been killed, has authority to throw you into hell. Yes, I tell you, fear Him." - Luke 12:4-5 So, who should you fear? Jesus is referring to God, of course. But there's a point to the fear, as I have said earlier. It is a good fear that leads us away from sin and to Jesus. As Jesus says in the verses immediately after: "Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? Yet not one of them is forgotten by God. Indeed, the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows." - Luke 12:6-7 As you know, God is merciful. He cares about you, and He knows how many hairs are on your head and how many cells are in your body. And did you know there are trillions of cells?! God knows the exact amount you and I, and everyone, have! I've already been over John 3:16: "For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life." But here's another great verse: "But God demonstrates His own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." - Romans 5:8 But how can we be saved? Is it because of what good we do on earth, and trying to "outweigh" the bad? No! That wouldn't work because we've already sinned and are guilty, and we can't make up for it ourselves by trying to keep with the law -- in other words for "keeping with the law", trying to do what is good now after we've sinned: "Therefore no one will be declared righteous in God’s sight by the works of the law; rather, through the law we become conscious of our sin." - Romans 3:20 Instead, it is only God's grace that can save us: "But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions—it is by grace you have been saved," (Ephesians 2:4-5). Furthermore, "For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— not by works, so that no one can boast." - Ephesians 2:8-9 The work is done, all by Jesus who paid our debt on the cross. As Jesus said while on the cross, "It is finished," (John 19:30). In other words, the work is finished. You just have to receive His mercy to be saved. How do you do that? Repent from sin -- that is, try to stop doing what's wrong and have this sort of repenting attitude -- and accept Jesus as your savior. "If you declare with your mouth, 'Jesus is Lord,' and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved." - Romans 10:9 And of course, that means doing these in truth. God knows our hearts, and we can't trick Him. "A person may think their own ways are right, but the Lord weighs the heart." - Proverbs 21:2 And it is important to note, we don't know how much time we have here on earth, and it's your choice to repent and trust in Jesus. But I don't say this to just scare you, I say this because it is important and God cares about you! And so do I.
@Anonymous Now, having OCD, you need to do ERP too and work with your OCD. Obsessive fears need to be dealt with. If you choose to repent and trust in Jesus, you will be saved, but you won't have your OCD automatically taken from you... You'll still need to do the work to help yourself get better, just like me and everyone else here. For Jesus said, "I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world." - John 16:33
@drStrange.One.2678 If I may ask, have you visited the link I shared with you? It goes into more detail of how we've sinned and a bit more of the specifics. I could also go into a little more detail here if you want, but at the link there's a nice and descriptive video you can watch.
@Anonymous Thank you for all your help! I still have some little bit worries but u explaining this to me help me.
@drStrange.One.2678 Is it still the same worries that you're talking about?
@Anonymous Also, eventually in faith we can stop being afraid of God’s punishment: “There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.” 1 John 4:18 “Whoever believes and is baptized will be saved, but whoever does not believe will be condemned.” Mark 16:16
@anonocd Thank you! It's important to remember though -- feeling fear doesn't mean you aren't saved, of course. This reminds me of something Mark DeJesus on YouTube might say. I'd recommend watching his videos on OCD and Scrupulosity
@Anonymous And don't forget! "For God is not the author of confusion, but of peace, as in all churches of the saints." - 1 Corinthians 14:33 This is important to remember with OCD.
@drStrange.One.2678 I know all of this won't cure your OCD, and I didn't mean it to. But, it is seriously important, and I really hope you'll think about what we talked about. I also thought maybe I should give you a few verses that go over how we shouldn't wait to receive God's grace, thinking we have a full and long life ahead of us to decide, for we don't know how long we will be here. "For he says, 'In the time of my favor I heard you, and in the day of salvation I helped you.' I tell you, now is the time of God’s favor, now is the day of salvation." - 2 Corinthians 6:2 And Jesus also gave a parable about a man who stored up a bunch of goods for years to come, but the man's time was about to be up that night (Luke 12:16-21). Again, the only reason I bring these up is because it's important. Besides, what good could come from putting off running to Jesus, the one who loved us and died for our sins? To recap, I'd recommend reading the Gospel of John to start, and from there the rest of the four Gospels. If you don't think you have a Bible, you could have as many as you want from the internet or an app store! Also, while watching the video at the link isn't as important as reading the Bible, it can still give you a good set of things to remember, that I didn't go in to too much detail about. And I'm not saying that you need to get "super religous" the way you might be thinking of. In order to be saved, it is really as simple as turning from sin and trusting in Jesus! And God will turn you into a brand new person who loves righteousness and hates sin. It'll be a personal miracle! "Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, the new creation has come: The old has gone, the new is here!" - 2 Corinthians 5:17 Temptation will remain, but God will help you with that, and forgive you if you ever stumble. And of course, God isn't just some kind of "divine butler" we whip out whenever we need His help with something. Again, we are a brand new creation in Jesus! "We are therefore Christ’s ambassadors, as though God were making his appeal through us. We implore you on Christ’s behalf: Be reconciled to God. God made him who had no sin to be sin for us, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God." - 2 Corinthians 5:20-21 If you'd like, I wouldn't mind praying for you here, too!
“Since you died with Christ to the elemental spiritual forces of this world, why, as though you still belonged to the world, do you submit to its rules: “Do not handle! Do not taste! Do not touch!”? These rules, which have to do with things that are all destined to perish with use, are based on merely human commands and teachings. Such regulations indeed have an appearance of wisdom, with their self-imposed worship, their false humility and their harsh treatment of the body, but they lack any value in restraining sensual indulgence.” Colossians 2
Yep, I have that one bookmarked! But what I'm wondering is this... Of course, in Romans, Paul says this: "So whatever you believe about these things keep between yourself and God. Blessed is the one who does not condemn himself by what he approves. But whoever has doubts is condemned if they eat, because their eating is not from faith; and everything that does not come from faith is sin" (Romans 14:22-23). Who does what is said in Colossians 2 apply to? I don't know the context of Colossians 2, but I believe what is being discussed here are at least those who are used to rituals. That does seem to apply to many with OCD, but does this apply to the grey areas of sin, I wonder? We know that "everything that does not come from faith is sin", but we also know that "One person’s faith allows them to eat anything, but another, whose faith is weak, eats only vegetables," meaning that it is the one with weak faith who doesn't eat meat (Romans 14:2). What does all of this mean in relation to the obsession of grey areas of sin? I'm still planning on doing ERP, though... But still, that's a question I've got.
Let me give an example of what I'm talking about and why this obsession bothers me. I used to play Pokemon a decent amount, and as we all know, Pokemon is a pretty controversial topic in the church. I started playing Pokemon, decided it might be bad like a good portion of other Christians say it is and stopped playing it -- giving away all my cards, too -- but then decided I didn't actually believe it was bad and went back to playing it. But in 2020, OCD showed up a lot more in my life with new and worse obsessions, and along with it I began questioning things like Pokemon, and a bunch of other videogames and movies and music. Some things about Pokemon specifically are the Pokemon in the series that are based off of other gods, and Arceus and Giratina. But I also think about other things that have similar themes like The Legend of Zelda, which I also played a lot; that, too, has other gods, but is generally more accepted in the church than Pokemon is. That could be partly because of animal abuse in Pokemon, but I'm not sure that's entirely it. Whether we like it or not, we're all a bit hypocrital to some degree, even if we can't see it... but I digress a little. What I'm concerned about is, is this really just OCD? I know some people would tell me that it is and they have no doubt; meanwhile, others would tell me, "No way! It's sin!" But another good chunk would tell me to decide for myself, but I'm still confused... But if it really is sin for me, and I do ERP and desensitize myself because I felt pressured to or didn't know, then would I just continue in my sin and not know it? I mean, I have reason to believe it is sin, but if I do it and do ERP and I desensitize myself to it, how would I be able to find the answer truly for myself? And here's something else that's been bothering me: one time, I brought up to my family that the Bible uses a dragon to represent the Devil in Revelation. To my understanding, though, it says "serpent" in certain versions of the Bible, and dragon just replaces that word, as it is a giant, scary serpent. But I wasn't, and still am not, 100% sure that all imaging of dragons is evil, yet because I brought it up and questioned it, one member of my family brought up that they were thinking of it, too, and another member has a few statues of dragons for decoration -- but they took them down and put them up because of all this. This whole situation kind of shook me, and now I don't really want to bring up any more things I'm thinking could be sin, and I don't want them to make my OCD worse if it is really just OCD, and I don't want to make them give up something they really don't need to... the list goes on. Does anyone have any thoughts on this, in general? I'm not asking for answers, and I definitely don't want reassurance, and I know this is kind of a lot, but any input would be appreciated... :) And it doesn't help that I'm not making much sense! 🤣 Sorry.
Does your family know about ur ocd when they put them up or took them down?
I can relate to this type of mindset, but I don’t think it actually produces the fruit of the Spirit. You’ll know a tree by its fruit!
@drStrange.One.2678 No, but even now, sin obsessions are a bit difficult to grasp. I tried explaining it once with an example, but that didn't go too well the first time. I could try to explain other things to them, but I'm kind of afraid they'll, instead of thinking about how it might be OCD for me, try and decide for themselves if it is bad, and they might decide that it's bad again. And for things like videogames and movies, I'm kind of afraid that some family memebers would decide it's bad and others would get mad at me for bringing it up, and having things they like be called sin or even taken from them. And I don't know exactly what I'd say about the dragons situation. I could tell them that I think it might be OCD for me, but it still wouldn't be OCD for them, and they were kind of thinking it might be bad. In Romans, it explains that some people have different things they believe are sin, and they shouldn't do those things, and others shouldn't pressure them to do those things; so with the dragons, there isn't much I think I can do. Or, I suppose they could tell me it's my OCD and bug me to do ERP for it for a while, or for the rest of my life, perhaps even if I decide that I think it is bad. OCD is hard to understand, and they'd probably just not get it... But maybe I should tell them still?
@drStrange.One.2678 I'm not sure if these things are sin, but with me not talking to them about these things, it kind of feels like I'm trying to hold on to sin. But I'm not sure that these are sin, and I'm kind of afraid of convincing them to believe it's sin when it isn't necessarily, and I am afraid of them just not getting it and rushing me to come up with a decision. Should I bring it up and let them decide for themselves, after suggesting the facts? Or is this thinking another part of OCD? Still, should I tell them anyway?
@anonocd Yeah, but of course I also don't want to sin. And kind of what I'm thinking is, for example, is it bad to have any relation to a game with other gods in it, plus supporting the creators for making such material with my money, etc? Some people don't watch movies with blasphemy in it; if you watch Living Waters on YouTube, you might know that Ray Comfort doesn't seem to. If it makes another Christian stumble, then it is sin for sure, though. (Am I stumbling when doing ERP, or is that different than doing something not coming from faith?)
@Anonymous I’m not sure if this another part of ocd. Ocd is still kind of weird to me. It’s quite hard as u are always trying to decide what’s is right and wrong.
When I don't do ERP, others get upset about it, and I feel like me making others upset is sin, as I really should be doing ERP. On the other hand, I'm afraid of doing ERP because others want me to and THAT is really the sin and I shouldn't just do things because others want me to.
If it's alright, it'd be easier for me to use this post for now
I do!!!!
Hi
Where are you at with this obsession? Still bothering you? Or are you better??
I’m so tired and always crying
I just want it to stop
I wouldn’t really worry about movies tho but I do have that. It stops me from watching
So this doesn't bother you that badly then?
@Anonymous It usually do but my friend taught me something. God wont allow it to be mad if he was against it.
@drStrange.One.2678 You mean, if He was against it, He wouldn't allow it?
@Anonymous Yea sorry
@drStrange.One.2678 It's fine. Do you think God is good, though?
@Anonymous Right now, ocd making me think that he revengeful. Bc I’m scared that something bad will happen if I break a promise . I scared that if I do something other the promise, something will happen. People keeps telling me that god is merciful and forgiving.
@drStrange.One.2678 Trying to rationalize things like that is a compulsion, just so you know. You are trying to neutralize the thought. When you do ERP, you'll want to instead try to sit with the anxiety while trying to not neutralize the thought in this way. !!! Also, I should probably mention that we're getting into territory that could be a bit triggering, but I hope it doesn't. And in advance, I'm not saying God's going to punish you for not following through with these "promises"... God is very merciful, but He's also just. For example, why should Hitler go to heaven after what he did and just be let off the hook? And God shows justice with everyone. But there's more to it than that; again, God is merciful, and He shows His mercy by instead of punishing us, He Himself died on the cross for our sins so He could be just in having our debts be paid and show us His mercy and let us go to heaven at the same time. And all we have to do is accept that Jesus died for us and try not to sin again. (But just to be clear, I am NOT saying that not going through with your "promises" is sin! It's not sin.) I recommend going to https://www.dontstubyourtoe.org for a better description about all this.
They'll teach you how to do ERP. That'll help you out a lot. There's no correct amount of time to do ERP, but I was recommended to have ERP sessions two or three times a day, but you are also supposed to do ERP whenever you get triggered. Also, I've been told to not do compulsions ever, but that can be hard, especially without knowing ERP. It's important to have grace with yourself. Also, don't do compulsions while doing ERP, such as reassuring yourself and rumination, or other compulsions. Are you a Christian? I'd like to know before I suggest something.
Thanks for advice! I don’t know how to do erp yet, but I been ignoring my thoughts when I promised or I insult god. This time I feel I knew what I was doing when I promised him and this promise I feel I can do but I don’t want to. I’m scared. I’m not Christian, but I did obsessively prayed and I really don’t want to pray any more.
For when you can do ERP, ignoring your thoughts is a compulsion. And yeah, I get having a good guess as to why you had the thought but still being afraid to not go through with it... I kept papers that I wrote down about my "mysterious what-if thoughts", and that's the kind of thing I'd write in them. Plus, I understand not wanting to pray when it is associated with such negativity!
I struggling with this daily. Im really hard on myself if i watch a normal movie but it has a bad word in it or something like that. I do it in other situations also, similar to you.
So are you in therapy? How are you doing with this obsession at the moment?
Im not currently in therapy. Im doing better but my OCD coming in waves. I do worrying about the obsessions daily though. Im a christian so i have a bit different of view of it then some. I dont know if its a healthy way to deal with OCD but i like to keep myself busy to keep my brain focused on something other then the worry or obsession. Though its hard to do once the obsession starts it helps me prevent more obsessions.
I've heard of trying to keep yourself busy, and I've tried that before for other obsessions. I'm Christian too. Are you able to go to NOCD?
Im not sure if i am able to go to NOCD im still trying to figure it all out. Since you are a Christian, this may help or it helps me at least to remember how God is. God is love. And sometimes its hard to remember that because i catch myself being like what if im not doing enough, what if im not nice enough, and so on. But like the therpay NOCD offers we have to remember to sit with the discomfort. It helps me to remember that God wont hold us to the standard of being perfect because we can never reach it. Im not sure if that helps you but thinking of it that way sometimes helps me.
Yeah, I think that's some good advice. But while you're doing ERP, my advice to you is to just try to stick with the anxiety and don't purposefully remind yourself of this -- remember, you want to learn to tolerate the anxiety for it to go away. And just so you know, this could be considered a compulsion if you are doing this to neutralize a thought, but it is a good thing to remember.
But what still bothers me is that I'm not sure if it is sin for me specifically, like what is gone over in the book of Romans and the weak and strong Christian. I'm still planning on doing ERP, but still.
Yeah, its weird how so many things i used to consider normal are complusions. Thanks for advice also.
Yeah, I don't like the amount of things that are compulsions.
Is it just me, or does anyone else also spike when they watch Christian YouTube channels like Wretched and Living Waters? Also, I watched a video about someone describing hell, and you can imagine what that could do to someone with an obsession about sin! (Still not 100% sure what I believe is sin, not making this any easier)
Plus, when I do ERP for these obsessions, I feel like it's sin and God is angry with me, but when I don't do ERP for these, I feel like I'm disappointing God, and that NOT doing ERP is the sin, as I'm not trusting God enough to do the ERP... I've tried ERP with some of the obsessions, and I've tried not to do what I think could be sin and had little to do with them, but the thing I haven't done is take down all my posters and put up my possessions of things that I think could be sin to see how that would be and how I would feel.
@Anonymous But then I look at other Christians, even those who have a pretty good influence, like those on the channels I brought up, and even those Christians do things that, if I had given all of this stuff up, I wouldn't be doing! I.e. I wouldn't be using YouTube (not even to watch Christian content), and I also probably wouldn't be going on the internet (besides if I had to) and playing any games or watching any TV or reading any books (aside from the Bible, really). So it can be hard for me to see the rhyme or reason why they do what they do and don't do what they don't do. That's what's up with my third option of completely stopping what I'm thinking could be sin...
Yeah sometimes it keeps me from reading the Bible because I don’t want to become anxious again
@anonocd We know that we should be able to do these things (read the Bible, watch Christian videos) and still do the things we think may be sin, but it does add another layer of worry at the moment. But avoiding these things feels almost like I'm avoiding the truth of my obsessions perhaps being actually true. (Perhaps just another obsession.) These are more triggers to use ERP for
Does anyone out there obsess about sins and if you’ve committed sin? And get bad thoughts in your head that could become sinful if you don’t blink really hard or repeat things to yourself ? It gets to a point where I cry and cry about it cause I can’t see anything clearly. I’m always questioning.
So I cant remember if I've ever asked this here, but has anyone ever done something awful that their ocd convinced them to do and now can't let go of the guilt? And I dont mean like terrible terrible things but like lying to someone, cheating, or something else that can cause heavy guilt. If so, how did you get past this? I feel like I'm not sure how to forgive myself when my moral code is so high.
Every time I watch an explicit video, I obsessively worry about whether or not the person in the video was of legal age or if I unintentionally looked at a minor. This causes me to have intrusive OCD thoughts that I am some kind of horrible pedophile or that the FBI will arrest me. I'm currently experiencing an anxiety spike right now because of it. Can anyone else relate to this? I only want to watch videos of consenting adults, but the need for 100 percent certainty makes it difficult for me to stop questioning it. Because of my religious beliefs, things like pornography are outside of my ethical values anyways, so I really want to break the habit of watching it in any capacity (even if I knew for certain I couldn't accidentally stumble upon a video of a minor), but I struggle with doing that. Does anyone have any tips to stop engaging in lustful behaviors, and how to deal with catastrophic thinking about jail time and being a sick person because I'm paranoid about if the model could be underage?
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