- Date posted
- 7y
- Date posted
- 7y
@Fox - thanks. We have been together for 8 months in a LDR. He’s committed and plans to move out here I just wish he would be more supportive. He tends to lose his temper in the face of all the questioning and I lose my shit sometimes when I can’t get a hold of him. I think we focus on the ROCD way too much in the relationship. It takes over a lot of our conversations these days b/c of how he reacts and how I react to how he reacts. That cycle needs to break. We both try. We both love each other a lot. He’s the first man in ten years I felt I actually have a future with and I think that’s a lot of pressure to put on one person...
- Date posted
- 7y
That’s amazing!! Great job ??
- Date posted
- 7y
Awesome! I know how hard ROCD can be and it’s so important to have a supportive partner!!! Good for you!
- Date posted
- 7y
great job!
- Date posted
- 7y
Thanks!!! @Rory
- Date posted
- 7y
Thanks @P, yeah I’m really glad about how supportive she is. I know a lot of people who would try to back out once they realized that “this isn’t going to be a simple relationship/ friendship”. I’m sorry you have to deal with ROCD as well, and I hope that you have found someone who is supportive and understanding and if you haven’t yet well know that you will find someone who’s right for you out there c:
- Date posted
- 7y
That’s great! It’s up in the air for me and my current partner unfortunately (he’s the “this isn’t what I signed up for” guy) ? so he might not be the right one after all which sucks to think about but something I have to accept. For now we push through it and try, try...
- Date posted
- 7y
@P, aw I’m sorry to hear that. Guys don’t expect to have to do tend to these types of things but sometimes that’s just how life is. Idk how long you and him have been together but seeing that he’s still with you I think he does want things to work out. If he’s committed to the relationship he’ll make changes to his behaviour towards it. It’s likely that he’s scared about doing something wrong and doesn’t know how to act in ways that doesn’t trigger your ROCD, if he’s willing to listen you should bring up some pointers with him maybe like a ‘do and don’t’ sort of list. I hope everything turns out for the best between you two
- Date posted
- 7y
@P , Hey I'm happy to hear that he's committed and that you guys have bigger plans for the future. Just from reading this I think you guys do yes focus on the ROCD too much but maybe in a bad way. A lot of good can come from talking about your ROCD but when those conversations are arguments and fights or how those fights and arguments turn out it doesn't create a lot of room for constructive conversation. I think what might help is to give him some tips of what he can say when you bring up something that seems like you're accusing him of something and I think he needs to learn some calming excercises like breathing strategies to help keep his cool. Idk if you have done this already but you should talk to him about the FEAR (False Evidence Appearing Real) Principle. He needs to know that the evidence you find is for a lack of better words not real. I really do hope the best for you two, it sounds like you really really feel connected to him and love him very much.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 23w
Today I over came something that had been consistently bothering me with my contamination OCD and I'm over the moon I never thought I could do it yesterday the anxiety was there but I sat with and it faded I'm so happy thank you for all your support guys and I recently started working out and I feel much better To anyone out there struggling it gets better trust me a few months ago I was at the Lowest point in my life I couldn't even leave my house I failed really badly at school but now I can even go outside I try to socialize some days are harder than others and I've had a few hiccups along the way but it has gotten much better And I'm starting a recovery course for school to make up for my grades I'm so happy guys 😭then I can finally get into uni
- Date posted
- 20w
I am FINALLY starting to (somewhat) recover from this last existential spiral, which admittedly, was probably the cruelest my OCD has ever been to me. Only thanks to you all. You were all able to provide me with kindness, understanding and support… without the kind of reassurance that feeds OCD, of course. When I downloaded this app, I was genuinely terrified. I was so scared that I was permanently doomed to the endless whirlpool that is the thoughts produced by my own brain and that life as I knew it was over, that I would never be happy again. For anyone who might be feeling that way right now, your OCD is LYING to you! Whatever you may be going through, it CAN get better. As hard as it may be right now, HAVE FAITH! Get up and do that thing you want to do in spite of the fear and discomfort. Take the fear with you like a whiny, unwilling toddler and do it anyway. Watch the movie, read the book, order that takeout you’ve been craving, bake the cake, wash the dishes… Please do it anyway! It will be hard at first, I won’t lie. But the OCD part of your brain, like a toxic partner, WANTS to win. It wants you to give up on those things that you love, all those things that make you happy so that there’s no space for anything but itself. Don’t let it win. The more you push yourself, the more you rewire your brain to realize that as much as it may feel like, the obsession doesn’t matter! Thanks to you all, even without therapy (YET - I’m starting that journey on Tuesday because there’s still a lot to unpack, and I know that OCD won’t just magically go away), I was able to get a basic understanding of ERP and learning to sit with discomfort and how to live life in spite of it, rather than letting it take over my very being. So for that, I thank this community. I think I would be in a very different place right now if it weren’t for the people I’ve met here who truly understood my experiences. I hope you have a wonderful day. Please don’t give up. You deserve to be happy, no matter what your brain is telling you ❤️
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- Date posted
- 15w
This is my first post on this app, though I made this account back in late September of 2021. I grew up in a toxic environment, and was mentally abused by my parents, included being taken advantage of because of my autism. I’ve been suffering from OCD as long as I can remember. Ever since I was a child, I’ve sometimes had thoughts that scared me, and I’d often try to find ways to calm myself down. I’ve had thoughts over the smallest and silliest of things, but as time went on, these thoughts suddenly became more violent, like wanting to step in front of moving car while waiting for the bus, or grabbing a knife on the dinner table and using it to stab a family member. Even thoughts of death and what happens afterwards scared me. Aside from being afraid of a kids horror show for a while, OCD did bother me at points in my life, but they never severely crippled me… until my teenage years. Throughout my teen hood, I would very occasionally suddenly imagine fictional child characters being SA’d. I would also sometimes imagine children getting injured while noticing them sometimes. I didn’t know why those thoughts popped up into my head and they would weird me out, but I would be able to usually push them aside and not think about them too much… but it got worse after I was dropped out of high school without my consent by my parents. In March of 2017, I was at a gas station when I saw a child and imagined doing a disgusting action with them. It freaked me out immensely and sent me into a panic attack. I was able to calm down from it shortly after, but I think it planted a seed into my brain, and it would launch a horrific attack on me the very next month. Me and my family were driving around a town for a special occasion when I had the worst OCD attack I’ve ever had. Every child I saw, I imagined doing something disgusting to them. I was having a full blown panic attack and it honestly felt like my mind itself was being sexually assaulted by this horrifying thoughts. This incident scarred me mentally, and to this day, I’m still afraid of being around anyone younger than me. I tried researching what these thoughts could mean, and I found out about these being symptoms of OCD. After talking with a psychiatrist a month later, I was diagnosed with OCD. For a while, I thought I’d be okay from that point. I thought I could conquer this on my own… but by early 2018, I was still struggling. I eventually came out to my older sibling and parents about what I was dealing with. They thankfully didn’t ridicule me, and did help me with getting a therapist. The first visit with my therapist went alright, but I was an emotional mess after finishing the session. The next time I went in however, I was seen by someone else because my therapist was out. The man I saw honestly felt condescending, and he basically made go to a group therapy session. The group therapy didn’t help in the slightest, and with more toxicity developing in my family afterwards, I stopped going after the group therapy. I did see my therapist at least once I think, but that was it. Ever since 2018, I was silent about my OCD. I was just hoping that someday I’d be free of my shackles both from my mental illness and my toxic environment. Two years later though, a friend (now partner) of mine heard about my family’s living situation and wanted to help get me out of there. I first visited them in 2021, and thankfully I stay with them for the most part. That being said, I was still worried about opening up to them about my OCD. I did talk with them about general OCD from time to time, but never got into P OCD… until last year finally. I opened up them fully about it, and both they and their mother told me that they weren’t upset, and that they understood where I was coming from. I think that genuinely helped me out, and I don’t feel as anxious as I did before. Just yesterday, I finally talked about my OCD to my older sibling (they’re super supportive and understand our parents toxicity). I was genuinely nervous about telling them for a while out of fear of them either abandoning me or ratting me out… but they understood. They were accepting and didn’t ridicule me at all. It was like a weight was lifted off my shoulders… and honestly, I think I might have the courage to speak up on this app finally and hopefully find a therapist who can help me. I’ve been suffering with P OCD for over 8 years now ever since I was 18. I just recently turned 27 a few days ago. I’ve been suffering in silence for so long due to trauma, fear, and PTSD. But now, I think I want to take a step forward and get onto the road to recovery. It most likely won’t be easy and it won’t happen overnight, but I feel relieved knowing I have people who love and support me, now that I’m in a better environment.
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