People with ROCD or have gone thru ROCD... I’ve been resisting a lot of urges to complete my compulsions for the past few days. I know this is a win in itself but right now I’m sitting in that uncomfortable “not right” feeling. It’s especially difficult since my OCD is trying to tell me it’s about my relationship. How do I act like my true self around my boyfriend when I’m in this funk of finding myself again? I feel like I’m censoring and watching so much on what I say (so I don’t ask for reassurance). He’s so supportive of me and what I’m going through right now. The past few weeks has revolved around my OCD and getting better but I just want to be back to our normal life where this wasn’t so prominent. Any advice?

I have this same problem. It takes a while to establish a habit and get out of that “funk” but distract yourself. After a little while you won’t even think about it. And I also write down concrete truths to look at when I feel that “not right” feeling. Your OCD and anxiety are playing tricks on you. Asking for reassurance isn’t a bad thing at all as long as you’re not going crazy on it. Especially if you explain that right now you need a little extra because of how you’re feeling. I’m sure he will understand. If he doesn’t, he isn’t the right guy for you.

Sounds like we have the exact same issue. Some of this I believe is an insecurity in ourselves, which is so common and so frustrating. I go through waves of being confident to going into that funk time to time. Unfortunately, when you love someone and the relationship is going so well, you become afraid of losing that person. That’s when the anxiety and OCD go off, terrible cycle. But it means we care.

Thank you! That’s pretty much what I’m doing. My therapist said I should write down reasons daily on how I know my boyfriend loves me. Because (obviously) I’m trying to get to a secure place without having to ask him! I thought this was something that was going to be difficult/triggering but I filled up a whole page in 5 minutes. So the evidence is there, it’s just about me fully trusting that and myself. It’s funny because a week or so ago I was in such a positive place and felt so good and then one thing triggered me and I’ve been trying to climb back to that spot I was in. Also when I’m in these dark spots it’s all I can focus on. It’s like I can’t even see that our relationship is so wonderful, I only focus on the negative behavior from my OCD and all the times it’s made me feel guilty.

Yes, I agree. Its a bad combination if you have OCD and insecurities. I actually had a breakthrough yesterday at my therapy session. My therapist asked me if any of my insecurity/OCD has to do with my parents divorce. And at first I didn’t think so because it didn’t really affect me when I was younger... But then I realized so many of my OCD insecurities lie within the longevity of a relationship, which relates to my parents divorce. I think this information is helpful in my “recovery” (not sure what else to call it).

I know you will get through this. It’s so hard but we just have to keep telling ourselves that we are worth it. And as long as we are good people and the person we are with is a good person, it will work out.