So I know that I shouldn't ask for reassurance but then I wanna tell yall something. I tried to not ask for reassurance for a day or two. It was horrible. I felt completely gay. I felt that I'm turning gay and so I was forced to reassure myself but I think day by day , the sources for reassuring myself are becoming less

I'm struggling. Not going to seek the reassurance I feel I NEED.

I keep asking for reassurance( which I know I should not do) and when I get the reassurance I want I don’t believe them and I keep asking again and again and again Basically I thought I did something today and my sister was there and I asked her and she said no but I keep asking her because I keep thinking I did this thing. She said she was right there and she saw and nothing happened but I seem to think that maybe she missed something and blah blah blah. My anxiety is even worse now about this topic

I had a bad rumination spiral yesterday and went to bed hoping I’d start over in the morning. I was wrong. I had dreams about liking women and not being attracted to men anymore and my entire body has been in a state of anxiety since. I genuinely feel like I’m gay and just need to accept it. I have this urge to accept it. Maybe if I do I’ll get some sort of relief because this feeling is awful. I feel like my brain is telling me that I’ll get relief if I just accept it and come out. The intrusive thoughts don’t even seem to be around sexual images anymore, just to come out.