- Date posted
- 4y
- Date posted
- 4y
Hey bud. This is me in a nutshell. In the past two weeks I’ve had a brain tumor, gastric cancer, leukemia, celiac disease, and multiple sclerosis. I perceive symptoms but because of the whole “uncertainty” bit, I become too afraid of what a doctor will tell me. I think this is one of the hardest subtypes of OCD because it’s difficult to know what’s real and what’s OCD. What I will say is that distraction/not engaging with those thoughts is super crucial. I find I fare better when I tell someone I am spiraling and we need to talk about something completely unrelated. Know you’re not alone ❤️ I am definitely right there with you
- Date posted
- 4y
I’ve also been trying to tell myself that my body will tell me when something is wrong. My OCD doesn’t know shit. But the wires get crossed because anxiety causes physical symptoms…it’s all so confusing. But I know that we’ve got this, and we’ll overcome this. 🙏🏼
- Date posted
- 4y
I saw my uncle pass from ALS. A year later, I had muscle twitching and for the last 4 years, I have been thinking I have it and am going to die. Same leg pain. Same twitches. I made the mistake of googling symptoms when it fist happened. It pointed to ALS. Despite 5 neurologists and multiple tests saying things are healthy today, I cannot convince myself I am ok.
- Date posted
- 4y
It’s so confusing because my anxiety makes me shake, muscle twitches, all that fun stuff. Anxiety produces really bodily responses, so to not go all OCD about it is probably the hardest thing I’ve ever dealt with. I need to make my avatar a female, because I’m a girl, lol!
- Date posted
- 4y
LOL oops. Anyway I understand what you’re saying, I have the same issues. The worst thing we can do for ourselves is hop on Google and try to figure it out though – the important thing to remember is that those Google searches lack context. We don’t know the nuances of medicine. We just simply make everything the worst-case scenario. I watched a video about how the nervous system plays a role in chronic pain (and by proxy, other fun symptoms). It helped me understand the mechanism of it, and what to do to calm down. Here’s a link: https://youtu.be/QFn_z_1lMWU Hopefully this helps you understand what the body does to us under stress. I’ve been diagnosed with IBS and fibromyalgia BECAUSE I live in a constant state of stress. Not the other way around. That channel also has another video talking about how to calm your nervous system with special techniques that I have found to be somewhat helpful. I hope it helps you too ❤️
- Date posted
- 4y
Thank you. I also have the IBS and other crazy stuff. I thank you for your support.
- Date posted
- 4y
It’s crazy what stress does to us!
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- 4y
I meant “real” bodily responses
- Date posted
- 4y
Anxiety does it all...
Related posts
- Date posted
- 14w
OCD can be so isolating. I’m in a health anxiety spiral and struggling at work. I feel like I am failing everywhere and feeling very alone. My support system is tired of hearing about my fears, health wise and work wise. I find myself crying a lot. I don’t particularly enjoy doing anything anymore. I feel like I just can’t get comfortable in my skin or my head sometimes. I’m not sure how to else to describe it. Like nothing soothes me or makes it better. Even sleep is bad dreams and waking up anxious all night. I’ve always felt different from everyone else but when I’m on meds I can fake it better and I feel more connected. I want to go back on SSRI’s but I’ve been dealing with health issues and the meds exacerbate them so am delaying for the time being
- Date posted
- 12w
I will preface by saying I am not diagnosed OCD, as I can't afford to see therapists or psychiatrists at this time. But given the things I've gone through, I'm pretty much convinced it's what I'm dealing with. I never really saw it coming. As a kid I always had health issues. Sick all the time, spent a lot of my very young years in and out of hospitals. In recent years as I've become an adult, health anxiety started creeping in. I spent my teenage years depressed, anxious and suicidal, both passively and actively. I engaged in self destructive behaviors in an attempt to end my life quicker. I left a toxic home environment and began my journey to improve my life, as I have a significant other that I want to stay on this planet for. I began lifting weights and exercising, eating better, and attempting to improve myself day by day. I didn't even realize it happening, but over time I started caring more and more about my health. Avoiding certain foods, making my diet stricter, and ensuring I did the right things. While it was good for my body in the short term, long term it seems it really affected my mental. As I started to feel better, I noticed that the times where I wasn't feeling 100% were very stressful. I'd start to worry about developing diseases. Diabetes, appendicitis, cancer, any number of rare and deadly diseases i could discover on Google. It got worse and worse as time went on. I'd spend money on things to test my body. glucose monitor, thermometer, supplements to ensure I was healthy. mental compulsions began (which i didn't know where compulsions at the time). Well, it all culminated at its peak in the last few months. Every minor bodily symptom, no matter how normal or common or frequent, became a life threatening warning. Constant googling, ruminating, checking and reassurance seeking, which at the time I didn't know was what I was doing. Then, at the end of May, I did get sick. And suddenly all of my obsessions and compulsions solidified themselves as real and premonitions that were true. I started spiraling. Avoiding social events, or anything that was outside of my room. Barely managing to go to work some days. Bringing my compulsions to work as well, sneaking them in when I could. Every day was anxiety riddled. I became exhausted. Sleeping for 10 hours, waking up still tired, coming home having no energy to do anything. It convinced me even more that I was getting sick again. I was getting suicidal again and contemplating it very often. I then noticed my Instagram feed getting filled more and more with OCD related posts and ads, I guess i was unconsciously finding and engaging with them. They described exactly what I was going through, and still am going through. I'm on day 4 of my recovery after learning some ways to help myself. I'm catching my thought patterns, learning to allow the uncertainty, and avoiding my avoidant tendencies. I removed the batteries from my compulsions and put them out of sight. I still am learning my mental compulsions and how to deal with them. I'm engaging with the things I would avoid now despite how I feel. I'm still riddled with anxiety and the OCD thoughts are very loud and frequent. But I'm feeling more in control and like I can handle the thoughts better. I'd love any advice people can give as well. I want my life back.
- Date posted
- 7w
So I’m new to this app and I knew there was something wrong w/ my brain for a few years now. I’m a professional volleyball player and was playing in France last year while in a long distance relationship. I would ruminate and think that one small thing was going to ruin my career every. Single. Day. And I have the fear that I NEEDED to end warm ups with a good hit or else I would play terribly. I had constant fears that my teammates don’t trust me and think I’m bad - when in reality and looking at the statistics I was one of the best players on the team - the fearful ruminating keeps me awake at night and it would get so bad that I would break into a rash on my neck. Lots of rashes from anxiety and over thinking :( My relationship was new but it was long distance. I never experienced this in my life: my mind became OBSESSED with the idea he might be ugly. I couldn’t stop thinking that he was ugly and feared that that meant I needed to break up with him and I felt like a terrible person constantly and the thought ate me alive - I was constantly googling about it to try and get some relief which I am now learning is seeking reassurance. I also have struggled with some forms of disordered eating for many years but it got so bad in France. I was binge eating a lot. I gained ten pounds in a month. I knew it and I felt it and I became OBSESSED with the idea that I’m so fat and a weak terrible person for not being able to control my binges. My therapist gave me some screener exams. I scored very highly on the anxiety test and the OCD test which blew my mind cuz I’ve never considered OCD in my whole life. I started taking Prozac which honestly I feel like saved my life. It’s been over 6 months since that point now and everything is so much more manageable. I’ve also recently learned that I may have autism as well. My brother has it and dad is convinced he has it but I was never diagnosed. I also learned I may have a bit of ADD as well recently. I’ve known I think differently for some time but this is just overwhelming and validating and confusing and a bit scary. My current obsession is worrying about my future career - I’m obsessed. I can’t stop thinking about it. I’m so afraid of my making a lot of money in the future. I take aptitude tests all the time when I get anxiety or go on Reddit to hear about other people which makes me feel okay for a little but it always comes back. My head is spinning. I just want to enjoy being 24 and having an interesting career and trust that my life will be okay but I’m so convinced that I’m going to suffer immensely if I don’t start pursuing a high paying job immediately. Im a smart girl - graduated from UC Berkeley - have done tons of networking in different industries - I have a financial plan for the future for when I start a normal job - but I cant stop this cyclical torturous thinking that I’m going to be poor and suffer immensely I also learned a few years ago I have an anxious attachment style which I thought I worked through but in my new relationship I have strong feelings for him and I feel the intense fear abandonment coming up and I’m so scared I’m gonna ruin the relationship - I thought maybe I’m just someone who needs a lot of reassurance but if I have OCD maybe that will make it worse? Feeling like I need reassurance to regulate? I just would like some help - have you experienced this? Is this even OCD? Am I making things up for attention? I’m going to bring it up with my therapist.
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