- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
Same, I wish I could have a different theme than pocd because the guilt and shame that comes with it is so unbearable and like you said I don’t feel hopeful for my future as well and genuinely can’t enjoy anything or feel happy most of the time because there’s always that guilt and that background voice telling me I’m a bad person. I’ve tried to give myself other themes because I’m so tired of this one
I have the same thing as u. We can talk if u need or ever need <33
I appreciate it, OCD is a very lonely disorder. Sometimes I forget that there are other people out there who are also experiencing the same feelings I am as well.
I feel the same it’s so sad. I wish it never happened:(
I feel you .. I have had most of them and that one with false memory hurt you to the core! If only we knew to disregard when we were young.. This is off subject but did y’all experience strep throat growing up have y’all heard of pandas and it ties to ocd?
Hey listen, I have obsessions that I am a cheater which involves things such as scrupulosity and false memory. Literally every single day I think I have to worst theme in the world and no one is struggling harder than me. I often wish I had POCD or something instead, anything else. But it’s really all the same.
^^
I hear you and understand you. I am sorry you deal with this. However, pocd comes with struggles of thinking we are PEdophiles, rather than just cheaters. Every single day, at 15 years old, I would sit in my room and cry for hours with a pit it my stomach, almost throwing up at the sight of myself in the mirror thinking I was a pedophile.
@Anonymous321 I think there can deffinitely be nuances to every subtype, but I think deep down we are all the same, dealing with the same struggles. I have felt that same way. I have been suicidal because of these thoughts and had to go to the ER. I think it’s just about what matters to us most.
I’m right there with y’all I had a false memory episode in real time .. it’s been horrific but doing my best with erp.
i feel the same way! just different themes :((
it can seem hopeless, but NO themes are good,
when i was going through ROCD, i hoped for Harm OCD to come back. be careful what you wish for with OCD! that’s like asking for a bully to bully you. they are waiting for you to ask!
@i_will_beat_this i completely understand, with Harm OCD, it targets my family and random people. ROCD, my boyfriend. i’m soooo sorry. no theme is good i promise. your feelings are so valid! OCD takes so much away from us it’s terrible.
For a while I've been struggling more with the contamination side of OCD, but before that, for a long time, it was POCD and things like thinking I'm a bad person. It was debilitating. And I moved on from it somehow, just left it behind. Until today, when even a small thing hit me with it again. It's not as bad as it might have been a year or two ago, but it just took me back to the awful pain of thinking I'm a creep. Even now, I'm convincing myself that it's real and not OCD. And it hurts so much that I can't tell. I know the pain each subtype brings isn't even comparable, but POCD and thoughts relating to it are by far the worst thing I've experienced. I honestly think I would rather wash my hands raw than go through POCD to the extent I used to. I would do anything to live with neither. Sorry this was just a bit of a vent, but I think it's important to talk about this kind of thing to people who understand. Whatever subtype you're going through, I'm sending you strength and comfort to get through it 💜💜.
I know there are a lo of different subtypes but I'm really curious as to which one has affected you the most, please comment down below and feel free to also share where and hoe you believe it has affected your life, I believe it's great for self reflection and just to let it off our chests. For me it's been Inc*st OCD! That shit has been the hardest subtype for me. Not only has it affected my relationship with my siblings by convincing me that I like them (which never used to happen at all before developing a strong case of IOCD) and making me feel weird and ashamed. It has also affected how I see families😭 for example I'll be watching a series or something and there would be siblings in the show and my mind would directly fly to incest and not only for shows but irl as well...I can't imagine going out to see my friends and their families or my own extended family in general because wtf!! I just feel like in my case all the other subtypes are nothing compared to this bad boy, but I know it's not the same for everyone so which one has affected you the most and how? (This is not to bring down the severity of the other subtypes istg, it's just for conversations sake)
Never feels like I can fully put my mind to rest. The problem with OCD for me is once I'm over one worry there's another buried deep into my mind that I'm not fully over. The two events I'm not completely over is when I tried to help a 17 year old with POCD when I was 19 and the topics unfortunately were detailed and even then I explained to them I wasn't comfortable with talking to them. I guess I just had a hard time saying no to someone needing help but it eventually made me so uncomfortable that I stopped talking with them altogether at some point. Then the other thing is being so worried that I committed a crime because my elbow touched someone's behind when I didn't want that to happen at all. I didn't want to listen to my OCD by saying move my arm or something horrible is going to happen so I didn't and then something bad actually did happen. I thought it would just be a light touch while zipping a bag up but then it was worse than I ever wanted it to be and it was so awkward and I hated it. I feel like I just won't be able to get back to the way I was before OCD started all of this. Aside from that I've just had extreme health anxiety but am too afraid to reach out to a PCP even though I need to. Something deep down is telling me I should do this but I'm just so anxious and embarrassed about sharing things to them. I can't even enjoy the things I used to do because this is constantly just messing up my life. I'm hoping I get a start of positivity next time I see my therapist. This just sucks. Feels like others around me are doing so much better than I am and I'm just kind of stuck on these same problems and feeling absolute shame and guilt from the past over and over again. I'm just so sick of dealing with this every single day so I just use escape whenever I can. Even that doesn't really work. I just wish I could go back in time.
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