I feel like it’s so hard to tell the difference. Like sometimes I have this moment of clarity where I know when someone is only a friend. But then next thing you know I feel like I can’t even remember what it means to like someone as a friend. And so if I like them as a friend or if I’m having a good time then that must mean something. That I’m attracted to them. I hope I can remember the difference some day and stop questioning.

I’ve had similar experiences :( i convince myself i’m in love with every single one of my girl friends then my ocd fixates onto certain ones Like one us my old female friend whose non binary & pansexual & would hit on me and talk about my body and make jokes about us dating And my other old best friend who was the opposite of that and i was so envious of her cause she had a sheltered life, is getting married to her first love, and all this stuff So i completely feel:(