Hi can someone whose part of the lgbtq community talk??

I’m really really struggling with knowing whether im straight or gay and im just in tears you can read it on my last post 😞

Im sorry if that was rude i never meant to be 😞

@hate_ocd.123 oh no you didn’t do anythin wrong! i’m still not sure how to read your last post <:(

@eridindan It’s one of the most recent ones under sexual orientation ocd 😞

@hate_ocd.123 i cant give you the certainty youre looking for but what i can tell you is that findin girls hot doesnt automatically make you a lesbian.. honestly, the way i want to explain it may come off as insensitive and most likely won’t help you

@eridindan It’s okay if you do, sometimes the hard advice is better than no advice

@hate_ocd.123 it’s not your fault and these thoughts aren’t yours but being gay isn’t all about feeling sexual arousal- you can find women hot even with ocd, if anything if you see a hot women just embrace that! it doesn’t mean you want a loving relationship with that masc woman on tiktok and it doesn’t mean you want to spend your nights holding that person in the lesbian tag close, it just means you saw someone pretty- i’m very sorry if this triggered you in any way, i’m really bad with this

Im just having a really bad day, i explained it in one of my newest posts 😞

@hate_ocd.123 Yeah I understand the feeling. The mental gymnastics and just uncertainty can be really difficult to deal with

@Debbie7 I just cant do this im so scared and numb and idek

@Debbie7 Idek what im feeling

@Debbie7 This cant be ocd anymore

@hate_ocd.123 Just know you aren’t alone. I’ve gone through similar and i’m still going through it

@hate_ocd.123 A post i made 2 hours ago is me talking a little about my experience as I started working through my sexuality if you think it might not be too triggering maybe it could help

@Debbie7 Was it you struggling with SO-OCD??

@hate_ocd.123 Yeah it was when I was questioning if I was asexual and dealing with all the anxiety and intrusive thoughts.

@Debbie7 I just read it! Not triggering at all! So happy you found your way 🤍 One thing i’m super thankful about is i was raised with a very open mindset and some of my closes role models were part of the lgbtq (i knew what being gay was since i was six, and was encouraged to have crushes on anyone, but i just never thought of anyone like that except a handful of guys), and now my two best friends are part of the lgbtq It’s just hard because it’s not what i want, but i feel like it’s what i want and im just lying to myself, and the opposite with guys Like i want guys but also dont want them because i don’t feel attracted to them & i feel disgusted by them even though i dont wanna feel that way And i even fallen in love with a man and i’ve only ever been turned on by men and i’ve only ever been romantically attracted to guys, except now that just feels impossible

@Debbie7 And you also made some really good points on accepting the uncertainty! I suck at that haha

@hate_ocd.123 Yeah it took me a while to get used to it. Going with the flow as it were is not as easy as it sounds because there are always what if’s and the intrusive thoughts that stir everything up. In the end I am ok to be attracted to whoever i’m attracted to

@hate_ocd.123 also idk if this helps but as an asexual i’m not sexually attracted to people but people who are more masculine presenting are the ones I generally like regardless of gender. Also it’s ok not to have a label. Sometimes labels help people feel secure in their identity but I found that a label gave me so much anxiety because i felt like I wasn’t enough or measuring up.

@Debbie7 That’s what i heard from everyone. Once you accept the uncertainty things become easier

@Debbie7 Yeah….a lot of things freak me out too cause i’ve been through a lot of abuse done by men, whether sexual, phsyical, or mental, so everything just gets so confusing

@hate_ocd.123 Yeah. I’m obviously not a therapist but when you experience trauma it interferes with your life and how you view the world . It would be a good idea to discuss with a therapist about your experiences and their impact on your journey figuring out your sexual orientation and working through your so ocd