cozymushroom
- Date posted
- 4y
SashaSasha
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 4y
Just let go. Just let whatever happens happen. Your desire to control the feelings and the experience is making you suffer. This is what OCD is good at. Not allowing you to accept the possibility of something. That’s why you freak out if it feels real, that’s why you freak out when there’s no anxiety, and that’s why you freak out when your recovering. Because your OCD doesn’t want you to live in this new feeling. I promise you this. If you can work on letting go, and accepting the possibility of breaking up with him and not loving him, you will find the peace and healthy relationship you’re looking for. But if you hold on for dear life, ocd will toss you around. It will torment you day after day. So what do you want peace and freedom, and maybe no bf. Or a boyfriend that you can never give full attention to because you are busy being tortured and destroyed by ocd?
cozymushroomcozymushroom
- Date posted
- 4y
It’s hard to accept that. I just want to love him idk why this is happening.
SashaSasha
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 4y
@cozycat I know. And I totally understand what you are feeling. Im telling you it’s going to feel crazy, but you gotta jump. You gotta take a leap of faith and accept the idea that you might not love him. Then your OCD brain will have no room to argue with you, and you will find the clarity you are looking for.
cozymushroomcozymushroom
- Date posted
- 4y
@Sasha It’s so hard. Like it just is throwing me for a loop. I just want to get through this with him not without him
SashaSasha
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 4y
@cozycat This is why OCD is so fucked up. This is why it’s so hard. Because the only way out of it is by accepting the things you fear the most. It requires you to be really brave. And I know you are. You got on this app. And you’ve been doing such amazing work because of how brave and amazing you are. But now you have to start taking that next step.
cozymushroomcozymushroom
- Date posted
- 4y
@Sasha I just don’t know how to accept it. Like I don’t know what that even looks like
SashaSasha
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 4y
@cozycat It’s like if you have two arms, and one arm gets blown off. You are so sad at first because you now have one arm, and you can’t do anything about it. But eventually you go “fuck it, I got one arm, I’ll live my life and still be happy.” It’s this ability to accept something and let go of this desire to “feel” a certain way. Right now you want to “feel” like you love him. But OCD is making you “feel” like you don’t. Accept that feeling and go one step further and accept you might not love him. When you do this you will get triggered. Don’t respond to the trigger, just let the trigger and obsession pass through you. It will be super uncomfortable but the more you let it just pass, the more you will start to feel sane again. I’m telling you this not out of theory or principle only. I’m telling you this because I did it in my relationship and after felt “fine” again. But I had to tell myself that I accept if I’m in a relationship I don’t want to be in, and I’ll just see what happens. But right now you are so stuck in defending your identity and your relationship, that you can’t let go. I’m asking you to just play a game of “I might not love him”. And see what happens.
Mixed Chick-Mental HealthMixed Chick-...
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 4y
Something interesting I heard on a thread on here about ROCD was, even if your OCD makes u question ur feeling, u can still choose to stay. Staying is a choice, not a feeling. If that makes sense
elsgomezelsgomez
- Date posted
- 4y
Something that helped me because I have the same feelings is I imagine what my OCD looks like and then I tell my ocd in my head. ‘Fuck you, you’re just a bully trying to make me believe things that aren’t there and you’re not going to get your way’ it’s a tool my therapist taught me, another thing that helps me A LOT is telling myself a thought is just a thought and keep repeating it
Be a part of the largest OCD Community
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond