Okay so I have a bad habit of imagining scenarios and gauging my responses to them to see what I like and I just saw a picture of Megan Fox like touching tongues with her boyfriend and I tried to imagine that I was doing it with her and I felt so many groinal responses and now I don’t know what to do. I am panicking slightly. I don’t want to just label it a groinal response because what if it was real arousal? Like I’m scared that I’m just in denial by labelling it a groinal response, brushing it off as a groinal response seems like something someone gay in denial would do. I’m so ANGRY, why can’t I just know who I am

I keep getting these groinal responses when I think about kids or see one and it's really distressing, I only just learned that OCD can make you feel that and it's not actually attraction but it's so hard to remember that and I've seen people talking about accepting uncertainty but I'm so scared to think "maybe it's attraction maybe it's not" instead of "no it's not attraction that's disgusting" and idk what to do

Does anyone else when they have the thoughts, they feel against it, but they still get arousal or tenglings sensations in the groinal area? Because this is what I experienced today and I feel like crap. This is going to be very triggering for a lot of you, but there are a lot of times that I notice things from kids. For example, there is a thirteen year old kid who looks very developed for her age, and I take notice of (and this already sounds creepy to me) her chest. Today with my thoughts, I imagined as if I were touching it, and although I usually "no no or "I don't want to do that", she is a kid, etc., I still get responses in my groinal area, and It felt very real. Even now, I feel as though I am faking it, even though I groan 😮‍💨 from it, and feel as though I am a fraud. Does anyone relate?

So I’ve talked to a couple of gay people and they all told me the same thing. They ALWAYS knew they liked guys and they have ever gotten aroused by a woman in their life. In fact they told me that they always found a woman’s body disgusting. Looking back in my life I’ve been attracted to girls for as long as I can remember even before puberty. All my fantasies were about girls and I can’t remember a time where I felt the same for a guy (because it never happened). At the end I can still get aroused by women and you can clearly see how much stupid this obsession about being gay is. Gay people can’t get instinctively aroused by a woman and like it. Groinal responses and sensations don’t mean anything because they simply do not bring joy or a feeling of desire. Instead they bring panic. I once got a groinal when “testing my reactions” and I was sitting there crying like my life is over. That’s not how genuine attraction works and no one has woken up one day feeling different and no one has been secretly gay and never noticed it and spent his whole life into women instead.