- Date posted
- 4y
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 4y
i feel like i’m lying to myself too :(
- Date posted
- 4y
Yeah I'm sorry, if you ever need to talk, I'm here for you, I ask cause we're the same age
- Date posted
- 4y
Not uncommon. I sometimes think that too. I think I might be a serial killer and OCD is just a fraud. Well thoughts are just thoughts you know. OCD targests right where it hits you. Don't be fooled or actually don't even be bothered after all they are just thoughts.
- Date posted
- 4y
Like it's like I'm trying to get help but my head is saying, "it's just bullshit, you don't really love her, why are you going through all this?" And I just wanna leave her but I feel that it's a compulsion becuase I always have this sickening feeling when I think about it. But then I think what if it never goes aways cause I'm with her, and I panic, I just wanna be with her
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 4y
@neverstopfighting literallt have this exact thought process
- Date posted
- 4y
@ anonymous Yeah! And I was doing better too, I thought. This is a horrible relapse. I'm so glad you understand me, but at the same time, I'm full of doubt :D if you need someone to talk to, im here
- Date posted
- 4y
@neverstopfighting Also I may be asking cause I'm alone for the weekend and I'm afraid of my own thoughts
- Date posted
- 4y
I can understand. I have been through ROCD as well and it costed me my relationship ngl. But thoughts are just thoughts my friend. You need to accept these thoughts. Don't try to find any meaning. Just accept, let them pass and move on. Move on even if you still have anxiety. But don't stop and start pondering. It's just a trap.
- Date posted
- 4y
Thank you, you've been very helpful, but how come I feel like blurring out that I need to leave? When this all started I used to say "I'm terrified of doing something stupid like leaving her and I love her so much" but it's getting worse and harder to say those things, I feel like I'm drowning. I hope it's ocd
- Date posted
- 4y
Also thank you im here for you if you need anything
- Date posted
- 4y
@neverstopfighting Thanks for your kind words. Really appreciate it. It's definitely OCD. If you think you need more help, I would suggest seeing a therapist as they would be more trained to help you than me.
- Date posted
- 4y
@akarsh9 I'm seeing someone on here tomorrow, this weekend is really tough and I'm having trouble getting through it tbh
- Date posted
- 4y
@neverstopfighting Do something to get your mind off it. I know it's difficult. But I tried meditation and it helped me greater than i anticipated at first. Try this video: https://youtu.be/dPvrwa95tEc
- Date posted
- 4y
@akarsh9 Thank you so so much for being kind, tbh Im kinda losing myself and I'm scared
- Date posted
- 4y
@neverstopfighting "There is no point in trying to wrestle a thought while you're in survival brain" This helped me a lot. I hope it helps you. Try the meditation video I sent you. I am sure it can help you.
- Date posted
- 4y
@akarsh9 Thank you so much, I just don't wanna lose her. And I believe that. I wanna get better, but at the same time I wanna leave, it hurts :(
- Date posted
- 4y
@akarsh9 So another question, how real was it when you were going through rocd with no help, did it make you physically ill?
- Date posted
- 4y
@neverstopfighting I wouldn't say physically ill but emotionally demanding. It definitely took a toll on my health because it wasn't just my ROCD but also my ex partner was abusive.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 25w
when i’m not thinking about a compulsion so i do things “regularly” does that mean it’s not OCD? i’m just confused is it all in my head? am i just faking it in my head all this time? sorry for posting so much my mind likes to go spiral lol
- Date posted
- 19w
How can i 100 percent ocd is lie? How does ocd always lie?
- Parents of OCD kids
- "Pure" OCD
- LGBTQ+ with OCD
- Magical Thinking OCD
- Older adults with OCD
- Mid-life adults with OCD
- Date posted
- 14w
hi yall im new here but not new to ocd. for as long as i remember ive had tendencies and ive had compulsions. when i was like 6 i remember counting my steps and that started this life long thing. i get looks in public because ive been touching each side of my face for the past 10 minutes because it “didn’t feel right”. about every one in my life knows i have severe ocd and that’s fine but my grandmother told my mom behind my back one night that i was ‘manipulating’ her and that my ocd could be fake. this is because i can’t take the trash out of the track can because i can’t risk getting sick from old food, i cant use cleaning products on my hands to clean them. i have no probably taking the trash out it’s just removing it from the bin. i can’t do the dishes because its not clean and ill have an anxiety attack because its just simply too overwhelming for my ocd. those aren’t the only things but the list is just too long to write out. but we don’t live with my grandmother anymore. when we did my ocd wasn’t as progressed as it is now and i was able to hide most of my compulsions and “rituals” (what i call them) in private, therefore she doesn’t see how much it can affect my every move. this happened a while ago but i keep thinking about it and i get in my head. when im really struggling it’s hard to not convince myself that i’ve been lying to myself and so many others for 18 years. all my compulsions and intrusive thoughts and the goddamn hallucinations i’ve had from ocd are in fact real but how can my own grandmother call me manipulative like i don’t get it truthfully. i cannot imagine a situation in which someone would go through the trouble of washing their hands 4 times, of blinking 16 times before shutting their phone off. rewriting a whole text to their boyfriend because i misspelt a word and so now the whole text is wrong or any other of these things i and SO MANY people who have ocd or ocd tendencies would go through the trouble because it is SO paralyzing. clearly i’m not going to explain myself to her because i don’t have that energy esspecially if she is going to ‘mhm’ me and then go again behind my back and tell my mom (who fully understands and has tendencies herself and knows i don’t make this stuff up) that im a manipulator.
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