- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
It’s like “okay cool I’ve found an answer” and then it’s like but wait no that’s not true! And it’s attached with this weird sense of excitement
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- 3y
Yes!
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- 3y
I feel that completely. It's because the anxiety and questioning can become so unbearable that you're even deciding you'd rather be the orientation that you aren't or break up with your boyfriend than have to deal with it anymore. Totally normal and it feels the ocd more :(
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- 3y
@alexisrae1999 Fuels*
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- 3y
@alexisrae1999 Exactly! I’m dealing w so-ocd but it now does it with the same sex and it really feels like I feel that way
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- 3y
@cozycat Its super tough. But the more you do exposures it goes away trust me
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- 3y
@alexisrae1999 It’s gotten better for sure! But now it’s just telling me I feel like this and I need to pack my bags and leave. And I’m like wtf I was just so anxious why does it now feel like this
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- 3y
@cozycat I actually broke up with my ex because of ocd (I didn't even realize it was ocd back then) because my thoughts were making me feel so crazy. He was pretty toxic looking back though 😂 but it was mainly ocd. I battled with the same stuff as you did and always felt weird on and off and anxious on and off. Super confusing
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- 3y
same! For the last 2 months my brain has been convincing me that I have a crush on a guy I go to school with even though I love my boyfriend and would would choose him any day but it makes me feel so guilty and sad like I have to break up even thought I don’t want to but these thoughts about having a crush make me feel so depressed because I don’t want that at all, It’s so painful
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- 3y
I have and it's scary cause those thoughts aren't true but my brain makes me think they are
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- 3y
SAME. it’s like they feel factual. Or when it tells me I have a crush on people
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- 3y
@cozycat That happens with me too cause then I feel guilty that I think someone else is attractive when I already have my better half...
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- 3y
@Animaniash Yep. And then it all just feels true and I’m like alright please stop? I feel so weird when I look at him. And when I tell myself I know I love him it sounds like a lie
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- 3y
@cozycat YES! I do love my boyfriend truly but I always worry I sound fake when I say that after I find someone else random attractive because my brain sucks. I hate feeling fake even though I'm not it constantly scares me ...
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- 3y
@Animaniash Exactly! I’m at this point where I don’t feel scared but I know I am mentally if that makes sense. And I’ll tell myself I want to be with him and my brains like “no you dont”
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- 3y
@cozycat Yes exactly! He's so understanding of my situation and condition and says he will make sure nothing ever happens to us. But of course my brain comes back with the "does he really mean that? What if you're the reason he leaves? What if you leave him?" And I break down crying
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- 3y
@Animaniash Ugh I feel that. Or “you know you don’t love him just do it”
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- 3y
@cozycat That one is the worst one 😭
Related posts
- Date posted
- 15w
Hey everyone, I wanted to come on here today to just share this post because I’ve been struggling with this recently. I just wanna know if this is a common thing in relationship OCD. So last Friday me and my boyfriend had a conversation that was important, and my emotions were high and I got a little emotional about something he said and we had a long talk about it, the conversation went great and afterwards everything was okay. On Saturday I was so excited to see him after work and I was overflowing with feelings of happiness and excitement. Sunday was great and we stayed on FaceTime just enjoying the day together after he went home that morning, and then came Monday. I remember getting a thought like this, “What if I’m losing feelings for him and I’m just leading him on?” And even this thought, “I don’t really feel anything towards him right now, does that mean I fell out of love with him?” And then the anxiety came, I could literally feel myself breaking out in cold sweats and I could feel the pain in my chest after these thoughts crossed my mind. But what bothers me so much about this is on Saturday and Sunday I felt so content and happy with him and I was so happy and I didn’t have any anxiety whatsoever, and then Monday came, and I had those thoughts and I feel almost numb and I can’t feel anything else except the feelings of worry and fear and my anxiety has been at a all-time high and I keep feeling this pain of guilt and hurt in my chest and I just wanted to know if anyone else has experienced the same. Because personally one thing I hate is that one day I can be so happy and energetic and then the next day I can feel numb and feel absolutely nothing towards my boyfriend. I’m not sure if this can correlate with my menstrual cycle as well, but I’ve heard that that can also make your relationship OCD worse and cause you to feel differently about your partner. Just wanting to see if anyone has dealt with the same!
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- 11w
Hi everyone, I’m a 30-year-old woman, and I’ve been in a relationship with my boyfriend for 5 years. I’ve always felt emotionally close to him — he’s caring, supportive, and we planned a future together, including having a family. I don’t want to leave him. He means so much to me. But for a while now, I’ve been obsessing over the fact that I don’t feel much sexual attraction to him anymore. It’s not like I never felt anything — when we first met, there were butterflies, excitement, emotional connection… something real. He was never “just a friend” to me. But the physical side of the relationship feels like it’s slowly faded, and I’m panicking about what that means. I keep thinking things like: – “Maybe I chose the wrong person.” – “You can’t be in love without sexual desire.” – “If I was truly in love, I would still want him.” – “What if I’ve been lying to myself this whole time?” Sometimes my body reacts — I can feel physical closeness or even arousal — but my mind shuts down and says: “no, this isn’t right.” Other times, I feel tension, resistance, or even disgust during intimacy, and I can’t tell if that’s anxiety or if something is fundamentally wrong. What makes this even more confusing is that I truly believe that real love includes sexual attraction. For me, it’s all part of one feeling — not separate. So if the attraction is gone, does that mean the love is too? Is it possible that this is still OCD — that my mind is obsessing and disconnecting me from my real feelings? Has anyone experienced something similar? Any support would mean so much. I feel so stuck between my mind and my heart.
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- 8w
Right now I feel like I’ve realized something awful. Like maybe… I never truly loved my boyfriend. Maybe in the beginning I was just excited to be in a relationship. Maybe I confused that excitement with real love. And when the intrusive thoughts started, maybe it wasn’t ROCD — maybe it was the truth hitting me. I write this and it feels real. That’s the scariest part. It feels calm and clear and like maybe I’ve just been lying to myself all along, holding on because I “should,” not because I truly want to. I can’t remember how it felt to love him — and that makes it worse. I feel so disconnected, so numb, like nothing makes sense anymore. Every time I try to feel something for him, it feels like I’m faking it. Like I’m playing a role, not being myself. But the thing is… I’m not at peace. If this was really the truth, why does it hurt so much? Why does this “realization” come with panic, guilt, emptiness, and so much fear? I don’t want to hurt him. I don’t want to lose him. But I also don’t want to keep living like this — doubting myself, my feelings, and my past. I feel like I’m stuck in a cycle I can’t break, and I’m scared I’ll always feel this way. Has anyone ever felt like this before?
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