hey guys i need help rn , i’ve never rlly posted on here but now i feel so mentally tired and in huge denial about being bi. this all started 7 th grade i rember i had the thought of being bi or lesbian and getting anxious and basically what i’m going thru rn, i had lots of what i call “false “ attractions and crushes like i would think if i liked them and got so bad to the point where i questioned if i liked my aunt and sister and i ended up getting past them but now as an 11 grader in hs this all started again bcuz of a dream i had which was kissing some random girl and from their it went on. i started doing compulsions and started getting intrusive thoughts and i started getting worse and worse and then i got better but smth would trigger the ocd again. i began to watch a video on youtube of how some girl knew she was in denial and i immediately freaked bcuz in the video she says how she had girl crushes when she was little and etc and i didn’t relate to that bcuz all my life i had boy crushes but then at one point she said she had a bestfriend that when they fought that it rlly affected her and that at one point as their friendship got closer it came to a point where she felt like kissing her and that when her friend had a boyfriend she got super jealous and although the jealousy part didn’t relate to me some of it did 😭for example when we would fight it would bother me so much and also i remeber once on our way to knotts scary farm i felt so happy bcuz i loved going their and then idk how it was but me and her planned to peck bcuz we were like “oh malu trevejo and her best friend pecked in the mouth “ and we didn’t end up doing it bcuz we were kind of like weird about it but it literally proves by those two things 😭not just that but also at one point like a year before that u belive i got a thought that i liked her and i got anxious and got mad 😭😭and then with some other girl while gling thru hocd in 7 th grade i felt like she liked me and i started thinking like omg what if i like her and i got mad which ik is denial bcuz why else did i get mad and now idk if that was a false attraction or not 😭