I MIGHT ACTUALLY MOLEST SOMEONE. so i was applying makeup on my sister in a aggressive and hasty and twice i had the thought it doesnt matter if part kf your hand touches her chest which scared me. Then i started applying it on her forehead in the same more aggressive motion checking to see if my hand touched her chest. It felt like i was doing tue checkimg compulsion but also ocd assigns random meanings to random actions. If my hand had actually touched her chest it was mestation but it didnt. Im so scared it waa so automatic. I thought my brain knows not to do that kind of compulsion!!!! Like in class it happens a lot where i move a body part and it feels like a compulsion. Im so scared ill moleat someone as a compulsion. In class i was like my mind wpuld only do that compulsion if i was certain i wouldnt touch anything which makes sense cuz its her forehead so i wouldnt touch her chest anyways. Im so fucking scared.

Worried about situation that happened with nephew new memory or not idk I'm scared Worried about situation that happened with nephew I'm so scared when I was holding my nephew I thought " I wonder if this would sexually stimulate him" ( not the exact words don't want to be extremely graphic) I began to bump him like how people bump babies on their hips he was on my stomach cuz that's how he was handed to me. Now I fear I remember also thinking if his diaper would stimulate his private part or something like that IDK LIKE I FEEL LIKE I REMEMBER THINKING THAT BUT ALSO DON'T??? LIKE O FEEL LIKE maybe I thought this at a different time for whatever weird reason but then I'm scared that it makes sense it would happen when I held him. Does it change the situation?????I feel extremely sick because I don't know why I would think that or if it was my brain or me. Idk if it was or wasn't cuz I felt his diaper against me? Was I curious if it would? It feels like I was curious but wth why???Was it just something weird I thought? Am I actually a monster? I had been having disturbing thoughts I'm pretty sure that were related to my POCD in general for a while before that. Ik my nephew didn't get hurt but I'm so scared why would I do something like that I feel so sick and disgusted. I know away from that situation I have no sexual interest or attraction towards him I'm just so freaked out and disgusted. I don't wanna be a bad person and I don't want my worst fear to be true.

I feel like I did something bad now because I went to put the blanket on my brother and my hand was close to his back I had a thought before like “it’s time to touch him” and I stood up and he was on a call but he was sleeping so now I’m like why did I stood up? Was it to take the iPad or what exactly? I feel like a child molester I don’t remember touching his area or butt because I didn’t but I had my hand near his back I asked my brother if I did anything he said no I asked if I did anything when I put the blanket over him he said he was sleeping so that doesn’t reassure me So I almost acted on it?

I hate when my daughter tries to hug me. I try to avoid it if I can but I had an episode where I couldn't. She was coming in for a hug and I tried to stay still. I had a thought come up that if I turned a certain way she'd brush my bottom with her hand when she hugged me. I contemplated not doing it and then I felt like I wanted to do it and turned my body. When she hugged me, her hand did brush my bottom and I panicked after she hugged me. I feel so much guilt for this. Why did I feel like I wanted to do this and let it happen? I have POCD, but this is just too scary to understand What I'm scared about is I felt the desire to move that way to make it happen in the moment. I recall feeling some sort of desire. But it would've never happened if the intrusive thought to move that way wouldn't have entered my mind first.