- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
Same. For me I have been with my bf for 4 years and haven’t thought of anyone since we started dating. it was triggered when I met someone that showed interest me which hasn’t happened since before dating my bf and it sent me into an endless cycle of worries “what if you want to be with them instead” “no I don’t” “yes you do” & the thoughts are endless. I plan to marry my bf etc like as you mentioned with ur gf so it literally sucks when you have thoughts of being with someone else when u don’t want the thoughts
- Date posted
- 3y
I had the same thoughts about 8 months ago about the same girl but I don’t know how they went away I think I just let them be and they went away on there own and now there back my mind panics and thinks well it must mean somthing or you would have just thought about another person
- Date posted
- 3y
Yup ur brain convinces you that you have a crush on them lol so that leads to googling and obsessing and guilt. When in reality it’s just your brain trying to protect what you care about most (your relationship)
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- 3y
I literally googled sooo much cases of people not having a spark or whatever to begin with but then having the best relationships and it brought me some comfort but as you know with ocd it just comes back even worse can I ask what do you do to help you if you don’t mind sharing
- Date posted
- 3y
I still struggle tbh. I’m definitely a googler for sure. I googled so many endless questions that would just end up making me more stressed. Lately I’ve been doing my best to not Google because it makes every situation 10x worse. I think it’s important to realize that if you didn’t really care about ur partner and didn’t love them you wouldn’t care THIS much about the thoughts ans they wouldn’t cause you this much distress. For me personally, I value my relationship so much that my obsessions are related to the fear of losing my bf so I will obsess about anytning that could potentially ruin it (such as another person for example) and I will do anything to try to prevent it from happening (thus leading to the rumination of these other people). I take it day by day, some are better than others. I focus on my goals and what I want in life. Focus also on yourself- make sure you are exercising, eating right, journaling if applicable helps too. We have to realize that we just care a lot About our relationships which is why OCD latched on to it and we have to let the thoughts just float by without worrying
- Date posted
- 3y
Thank you so much for your reply it means a lot iknow how much I love my girlfriend when I first had the thoughts about what if I liked this other girl more months ago it turned into so does that mean I don’t want to be with my girlfriend and then that was the thought that got stuck but because this time I’m not letting it get to that and I know it’s ocd it’s just staying at what if you like this girl more because of this stupid spark or whatever you want to call it but what I have with my girlfriend now means more to me than anything I just don’t want to have these thoughts anymore I had to tell my girlfriend about everything she is so supportive with everything It just makes me love her even more I hate having to tell her I’m having these thoughts but I feel like I’m lying to her unless I do
- Date posted
- 3y
Yeah for me I tend to keep all my thoughts to myself because I know it’s just my OCD talking. Personally I think they’d do more harm then good in my relationship so I just tell him that I am struggling with my mental health and let him know how he can help etc instead of telling him every thought that I have.
- Date posted
- 3y
Do you not feel a guilt or like you are lying to your S/O
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- 3y
And does it convince you that you actually like that person like you feel like you do ?
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- 3y
yes OCD convinces you of many things but you are not your thoughts.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 14w
I suffer with a constant worry of what if I’ve cheated. You name it I’ve thought I’ve done it. I’m quite flirty at nature and also insecure. Sometimes hand in hand I don’t think they balance each other out as the constant need for attention to validate myself can backfire. Although I have the best partner ever and she makes me feel nothing less than beautiful I still crave validation from others. That being said someone I used to work with left over half a year ago and when they worked at my current place of work we were very close. Text everyday, phone calls you name it. However looking back I was extra flirty as I wanted him to fancy me. I wanted the power to turn him down to make myself feel better. Awful I know. Now all I can think about is what if I’ve done something. What if I kissed him. What if I’ve slept with him etc. I’ve kept our whole conversations from the minute I got his personal number. I constantly search key words to see if my intrusive thoughts are real. I can except the uncertainty my therapist tells me about as if I have done the worst and cheated I would loose my partner and our 10 year relationship. I love her so much she is my life but I can’t stop thinking what if I’ve cheated. Does anyone else suffer with the same theme? If so how do you cope?
- Date posted
- 13w
Hey guys so I have been suffering with sexual ocd due to the fact that I don’t feel that romantic spark with him anymore, I love him and I know I do but I get to much in my thoughts thinking about why can’t I feel that anymore what has changed what if I don’t wanna be with anymore I’ve been with him for 4 years and at first I think it was ROCD but now I started thinking what if I’m into girls now I’ve always been the type to say oh a girl is so pretty or I like this about her but now I feel like every time I see a girl I’m like do I see myself in a relationship with her oh she’s pretty oh I like her voice do I find it attractive and sometimes I do !!! Which is killing me I feel disgust thinking about because what if I secretly am no shame to people who are my sister herself is but I just feel wierd because I wanna be with my husband and feel happy there not with a girl and feel like a man because I see myself in the mirrior and I’m like do I myself being a man do I look lesbian? Do I act lesbian or bi? What if secretly I wanna be a man or I imagine myself being a man in a relationship with a pretty girl and idk what to think
- Date posted
- 10w
it started when i simply worried about my partner losing feelings because she was being a bit distant and so i obviously spiraled and started thinking “oh yeah she has to be losing feelings of some sort” she was only being distant because she was preparing for her confirmation party (this is important) and me and my friend hung out the same day and ended up walking to her house to say hello to her as a joke. but i was already way too deep in my spiral. right after that interaction with her, she literally reassured me right then and there that i was “cute” and that “she really likes me” but i was so caught up in the idea that shes losing feelings for me that i couldnt accept the reassurance and kept having intrusive thoughts that shes lying to me and that she doesnt mean it. but whatever, i wasnt THAT worried because her confirmation is coming up and she wouldnt lose feelings for me before something like that right? a couple days pass by and im at her confirmation party, shes being a little distant but only because shes tired (evidently too) and so i was still in a spiral. but then i met her family, and her mom let me have her number (in case i wanna schedule something with my gf) and that sparked a whole episode. i talked to her mom a couple times and started worrying about if what it would be like it i left my gf and how it would affect me and her family and quickly a thought followed up with all her physical imperfections and how much i dont like specific ones. and then another one came up. i saw one photo pf my partner and swore it looked like someone in my math class who isnt attractive. i managed to get rid of that thought the first time, and had to deal with the imperfections idea thing for a whole month. recently tho, the unattractive girl from my math class is popping up in my head again. i cannot get it out of my head, any advice? what is this phenomenon and also im pretty sure im the only person who has dealt with all of these thoughts.
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