Maybe you guys can help me out a bit - I think ive been experiencing SO OCD the past few years in and off but I'm also not sure. I have a lot of lesbian dreams, i really like romances between woman in movies, books etc. They turn me on a bit and sometimes i feel like i resonate with the characters (this might be because I'm a bit more of a "tomboy" and resonate more with more masculine depictions of women in media). I'm not afraid of being bi or being a lesbian - i was afraid of being a lesbian with the implication that i wouldn't really love my boyfriend :/ and the whole, what if I'm unknowingly repressing part of myself and would be happier with a woman? Being bisexual wouldn't be a threat to my relationship as much though, and I know I'm attracted to men. In the past i get caught up in checking attraction for woman a lot abd imagining what it would be like. Sometimes the attraction i feel, which might be false attraction, disappears completely abx ither times it feels real and i might like it. The reason i think its OCD is because I feel a urgent need to know for sure with certainty whether i am Bi or not - even if if doesn't bother me to be bi. Thoughts?

NOCD Therapist - Jenna O.

206d ago

The urgency is what stands out to me. Urgency can often be a red flag/give away that OCD is trying to dig its heels in. Sometimes there is a "need to know" element - going along with a fear that, somehow if I don't know I'll be uncomfortable forever. So maybe that's the fear you'll have to sit with- not traditionally the fear that you might be a different sexual orientation, but rather, the fear that you may never know 100% and that might make you uncomfortable somehow. There are some things in life we will never know 100%, many things in life / if not all are not 100%. So your recovery i think based on what you said will probably come down to releasing your need of NEEDING to know the outcome and being 100% sure.

ode

206d ago

Thank you so much! That is really helpful. This one was tricky for me because i suspected it to be another OCD theme, but it seemed different than what other people were saying about the fear of being a different sexual orientation. Thanks for your insight