Hi guys, I’ve been wanting to get a septum piercing, but I’m aware that the person doing it will likely be tattooed and stuff, which I find really attractive and I’m scared that I might just be doing it to be in close proximity to one of these people. I have cheating ocd and I have a horrible groinal response whenever anyone goes near me which makes it way worse and convinces me more that I’ve cheated when I’ve been near people. I get thoughts like: do I like this? Am I standing here because I want them to be close to me? So as you can imagine the idea of being that close to someone who I will probably find attractive is very distressing. I also tried to “figure it out” and when I asked myself “am I doing it because of that?” My immediate response was “that’s a big part of it”. Is this just OCD getting in my head and twisting my thoughts? I genuinely don’t know what thoughts are my own anymore. I ask myself questions like “would I still be going if I didn’t find them attractive and didn’t have this groinal response?” And my immediate answer is no, but I don’t know if that’s my OCD or my genuine response. I love and care about my boyfriend so much and I don’t know what to do. What also concerns me is that I often want to do the opposite of what I’m stressed about. For example, if I am worried about going to the shops because I’m scared of people being near me for the above reasons, I want to go to them more. Am I some kind of sexual predator or am I just trying to resist against compulsions? I can’t understand myself.

Relationship OCD

Sasha

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 4y

The signal that you’re interpreting is misinterpreted. It’s a distress signal, that makes you feel like you want it more, but in actuality it’s your brain wanting to “fight or flight” the scenario. It’s similar to if someone wanted to beat you up, you get a distress signal that you have to do something about it. Same thing happens here; not now it’s an abstract concept that isn’t even a real threat. In order to move past this you have to have this insight but also apply this insight. For example, I used to have groinal responses around children and it freaked me out and I would identify and create stories with them. Now I have a groinal response, and I don’t care. It’s just a sensation. I treat it like my arm itches. There’s nothing to do. And the response fades away. But when you freak out, you are reaffirming your ocd thought and basically giving the alarm to your brain to create stress response.

sunshineforest

Date posted: 4y

Thank you for the reply. I also suffer with it around children and I hate it, even though I know what it is, it makes me upset. I think the problem is is that I don’t understand the details, like the ones you explained ^ I think I can only learn to cope with it if I actually know what I’m dealing with. So your reply was very helpful. I’m on the road to therapy luckily! :) so hopefully all goes well

Sasha

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 4y

@philmitchellswag Yes. Studies show that people who gain more insight about the disease do better when they do treatment

Lotte93

Date posted: 4y

Sounds like getting the piercing could be a good exposure for you! Go along, do this thing because you've always wanted to, enjoy every minute of it and when the thoughts inevitably come, acknowledge them and let them be there but don't let them take away from the experience!

sunshineforest

Date posted: 4y

With the shops thing, yesterday I waited until the time I knew would be least busy and resisted going earlier all day. This is because of this questioning. I know that I probably just wanted to go because I was getting annoyed and bored, and I’ve told so many other people on here that ocd preys on doubt, but when it comes to myself it’s difficult.

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