Anyone else feel like they are totally accepting of the thoughts now and that they are now in the closet and this isn’t ocd anymore? I feel like I can live a normal life and I have this thought in the back of my head at all times that I’m gay. I just want my life back

absmcgee

201d ago

Yes

BradOCD

201d ago

Yes! I’m not totally convinced that I’ve never found the opposite sex attractive and I’ve never enjoyed sex. Even though I’m pretty sure I have. I had always had bedroom troubles so sex just was never a big deal to me but now it seems like this huge deal. All the times I had enjoyed it was when I was completely in the moment. But I had found being in the moment hard because of previous trauma due to a medical condition. So that was always my reason now this has become my new reason. I can’t tell whether it’s just an excuse to fix an issue or whether I genuinely am gay. I’m now thinking that all the sexual material I watched I was focused on the guy and not the girl even tho I didn’t think I was at the time or even if I was it didn’t mean anything. I still had never ever contemplated wanting to get with a man. It’s just so confusing idk anymore. I just feel like I’m in denial and clutuching at Straws and really I must be gay

allyocd

201d ago

Yeah I just feel so helpless. I feel like I’m geuinely gay now and it really sucks bc I don’t want to be. I want to be me again.

Lilyrosalynd

201d ago

yessss!! do you feel anxious though? i barely ever do and barely do compulsions anymore :(

allyocd

201d ago

Same here !!

Lilyrosalynd

201d ago

@allyocd really??? to this extent?

allyocd

201d ago

@Lilyrosalynd Yes. I don’t really get the anxiety anymore, well atleast I don’t feel it and my compulsions are low. Kinda just feels like I’m gay now. It’s tiring

Lilyrosalynd

201d ago

@allyocd yes yes yes!!! sorry but i am relieved someone else is going through this! if you ever need anything i am here <3

allyocd

201d ago

@Lilyrosalynd Thank you!! Same to you.

BradOCD

201d ago

Is anyone else scared that the reason they feel so slow is because they’re in the closet now?

allyocd

201d ago

Yes

BradOCD

201d ago

@allyocd It just feels so real, and I’m just depressed of having these feelings. And I’m scared they’ve always been there and I just didn’t realise. I don’t know who or what I am anymore.

allyocd

201d ago

@BradOCD I feel completely the same. Just want it to end

BradOCD

201d ago

@allyocd Everytime I read an article about HOCD or coming out. It just makes me more confused. I feel like my whole life has been a huge lie and I was just making myself feel things that weren’t there

193d ago

Hi allyocd, OCD is called the doubting disease for a reason, and doubting whether you have or have ever had it is one of its favorite tricks to play on you. If I may ask, what is the source behind your concern over your sexuality? If your concern is because of intrusive thoughts or dreams that you have had, remember that you are not your thoughts or dreams. I think most people have had questions about their sexuality at one point or another for varying reasons. I certainly have, as well as many of my friends and family members. As much of a cop-out as it may sound when you have the intrusive thought question your sexuality or who you are, just tell it “so what?” And try to go about your day not giving it the attention or rumination that it craves. So what if it’s true or not true, so what if your preference has or has not, changed, so what if you are or are not attractive to the same or opposite sex, you are still you at the end of the day, nothing will change that, not even your OCD.